you spoke with your back turned
like nothing was wrong
a kettle sat screaming
its blistering song

your eyes crack with thunder
I don’t look away.
I taste every stormcloud
and swallow the rain

you asked if I loved you
then smirked at the floor
i said it too slowly—
you reached for the door

we fought in the hallway
with breath and with teeth
your moan was a trigger
my ache, underneath

you find every fracture
then press where it stings
You say, “it’s devotion,”
and tighten the strings

we crash into rhythm
too wild to be right
but god, we were holy
in sin and in spite

your hands found the bruises
you’d left there before
you kissed every wound
then begged me for more

but still, when you’re shaking,
and all fury’s gone—
I gather your pieces
and whisper a song

I stitched up the silence
you gave me to keep
and rocked us together
til sorrow found sleep

We curled in the ash
what didn’t survive,
and found even ruin
leaves something alive.

i lust insist
tense under ruttish restraint and expectation
                                                     ­             trussed

It's never been like this before.
Not as far as I can remember.
Your words, your mind, your voice, your smile...
Familiarity, down to strange details.

The way I feel I can read your mind as you debate an approach.
The way you likely notice me, pretending to not notice you.
Yet we both avoid meeting a gaze as the distance closes...

Smile, greeting, small talk, laughter...

...Touch....

And time stops - if for at least a second.

...Breathe, smile, banter...
A few seconds of silence and I've tripped on the tension.

Quick diversion. depart.

Killing me harshly is the pleasure of a thousand lullabies
And am I the one that pleases thee
Till I am standing not on my feet but on all of my limbs
Little ****** of sensation filter their way into your soul
Yawning at a time like this doesn't bode well for your aspirations
Never mind the things that seep out of your mind.

Fragile glass fingertips grace the pillows of nothing
Racing to feel again and touch something
Any excuses to sensationalize your memories
Negating the reality of past experiences
Clinging to the thought of a paradise
Expunging the ruby tears that rain down from your eyelids
Smothering the lipid-laced treats that linger on the tongue

More than ever shall we dance again
Over the river bending into the graveyard
Rolling down the grassy hills
Across the metamorphosis of a Tiger Lilly
Let me bloom into the unknown
Escape the neglect of myself.
Sooth the soul and let it keep fluttering

How are we so far apart in this bed?
Sleeping with venom in our hearts
Tension fills the room when we’re together
It’s love and war between us
Since when did we become enemies?
Fighting on opposite sides
Two atomic bombs ready to explode
The battle line was drawn when the arguments lingered long after malicious words were spewed
Like a gunshot what’s said can’t be taken back
The wound stays hidden under layers of resentment
Building like mold until it festers over the foundation we’ve made
What remains is similar to a war torn country.

there is a ****** tension
between my ego and my self-loathing

they both love to **** each other,
it's almost alarming

looking in the mirror I'm so alluring,
I could blow a kiss

while plotting to sedate myself,
to fabricate a bliss

I legalize hate for myself
to encourage my fouling

I pollute the good in me,
so why would it surround me?