I heard your scream through the wall
She’d said,
You were shouting about a great fall,
Did you end up dead?

I heard your scream through the wall,
She’d said,
And then you started to ball,
Did you forget to take your meds?

I heard your scream through the wall,
She’d said,
You said they made you feel small,
Did those voices ever leave your head?

I heard your scream through the wall,
She’d said,
To the soundtrack of thunderous rainfall,
Did you think you were on your deathbed?

I heard your scream through the wall,
She’d said,
I ran in and saw it all,
Did you think I’d leave while you bled?

i'm drowning in my own thoughts

no one can hear me screaming silently
i'm trapped inside with no way to the surface

my whole body feels as heavy as the whole world
why did i shut down?
i don't want this anymore
i don't want to live like this
with my chest feeling so heavy
with my breath being not steady

silence is the loudest of all screams.

‘I don’t know’.
That isn’t an excuse. That’s not the easy way out.
I genuinely do not know the answer to the question you’re asking.
Oh you’re frustrated?
Imagine how I feel!!
You just asked that question.
I have been asking that question my entire life.
“Why can’t you just..?”
I
             DON’T
                                   KNOW !
I want to scream,
to cry,
to be heard in some way !!
and not because I need the attention but because I genuinely have something to say..
Something worth hearing..
I’m scared of what’s in my mind.
I’m scared that I’m running out of time.
I’m scared to be alone because I don’t trust myself.
Not around scissors.
Not around pills.
Not around myself.
Do you know how that feels?
Do you know how it feels
to not trust yourself
around yourself?
I am at war.
   My mind
        vs
       Me
with my heart as a witness,
my soul as the prize
and my body, the battlefield.
I wonder..
Will I be a causality?

It is a tumor, a cancer, spreading within
It leads me to stop and quickly give in.
It is a fear, a fight, an attack without sin
It is a tumor, a cancer, waiting to begin

It is an insect, a bug, eating my skin
It gnaws, chews and swallows again.
It is a hornet, a thorn, a venom akin.
It is an insect, a bug, drinking me in.

It is a shriek, a scream, yelling herein
It wails, bellows a terrible shrill din
It is a banshee, a siren, a death grin
It is a shriek, a scream, breaking me in.

scream
loud,
be
heard,

its ok