Please stop playing with me.
I can't take it anymore.
I really like you,
Like really.
It's that like where I know I want you and only you,
That I know I would do anything for you,
That forever and always,
But you don't feel the same.
And even though I know you don't,
There are times where I think you do.
Like when I catch you looking at me for a little too long,
When you tell me things that you say you haven't told anyone else,
When I feel my skin shock cold after your lingering touch vanishes,
When you talk about me to other people,
And of course,
When you hug me.
Now that's my favorite,
Hugging you.
I don't want you to ever let go,
Because it feels so perfect,
Warm and safe,
Like I can stay there,
And nothing bad will ever happen.
But then it's over,
And something always does.
So I convince myself that it's better to keep away,
I go through the same process everyday,
Delete your texts,
And tell myself I'm done.
That's it.
But then I look at something,
And it reminds me of you,
Or something happens,
And I want to tell you,
So I go back and forth,
Until I cave,
And I text you.
Sometimes you reply,
Then other times you make me wait,
And I can't think about anything else besides you.
I check my phone,
Over and over again,
Waiting to see your name,
But all I see is the same ugly wallpaper,
And the time.
So I calculate how long it's been,
Down to the exact minute,
And I get angry,
I know you've seen it,
There's no way you haven't,
And I tell myself that I hate you,
That I'm done and that's it.
And I really believe it.
But then I see your name,
And every bad feeling magically floats away,
And I'm right back to where I started.
Thinking,
Wishing,
Dreaming,
Hoping,
Of an endless future,
Of me and you.
