I have plans for the moon
By night and by day
sometimes opening, sometimes closing
a seeing which does not depend on the eye
and an eye which does not merely see.
The moon gets behind me
and flows like a stream
inside a mountain
many dark miles unseen
before emerging as the source
of something pure that will heal me.

I have plans for the moon
like the sunflower nodding in the mind
shifts and keeps an eye
on father sun in the sky
resemblance does not depend on closeness
but the transfer of heat and invisible elements.
In the cool of the evening
a trail appearing through the dew
where an animal walks with a god
and man is missing from the middle.

I have plans for the moon
as the moon has plans for me.

At sunset you told me
what you were holding back
your plans
your dreams
how wide they stretched
your eyes sparkled
at the road ahead

At sunrise
I found you missing

I recall
your plans
your dreams
the light in your eyes
did not include me

"Dear God,

I know that I've made some mistakes lately.
I know that I've done things I shouldn't do and said some things that didn't represent you..
But today is a day that begins anew and I have found some things to offer to you.

Today, I give you my responsibility.
I vacuumed and dusted, and paid out some bills.
Sent emails, made phone calls, and to go out with a ****..
I took out the garbage and vacuumed my floor.
I've never given you that before.

Today, I give you my focus
I sat down and read, for an hour or two
On adventure, on love, and a bit about you.
I wrote that **** paper and although it was painful,
I sat there like a drone and watched History Channel

Today dear God , I give you my game plan,
For I've made one just for you.
In ten years i’ll be in California with a child or two
I’ll have a nice house and a flawed but beautiful spouse
A cross on each wall to prevent a downfall in our habits of worship to you

In five years i’ll be married and i’ll have a career
at a  giant corporation where I get to steer
where my life is going and the number on that check
this will easily prevent me from becoming a wreck

In two years dear God i'll have finished up school,
got the perfect degree and a pedigree smile on my face in
that green and gold graduation photo i’ll be running a race that I am ready to win

Today I give you the love in my life
I've got you a man that should suit us right
He is gentle but strong and there's only a few slight things wrong but
He believes in you and I cant really wait around for much longer..
So I got him for you

So I know that I've made some mistakes lately.
I know that I've done things I shouldn't do and said some things that didn't represent you..
But today is a day that begins anew and those are some wonderful things that I've prepared for you

So why am I sitting alone in my room lost and confused and unable to move
because i'm consumed in my sobs of failure….

What did I do?"

And when you didn't answer I gave up on listening and sank into my bed…
That was when you  decided to speak and said “Child rest your head
on me.”
I see what you've done and I see what you've made and  its lovely, but in substance
it is merely a charade of how you’re supposed to be
You forgot one small creed child its so simple indeed..
just one small question you needed to ask me before your life was freed..

And that was “Dear God, what is it that you need?”

SO I say to you dear child that all I ever wanted was you.

I love your responsibility, your focus and hope,
I understand that you wanted a man to help you cope
but surrender to me and you will finally see
that blind faith is what blossoms young seeds into trees.”

So I sat there and sobbed some more.
Then I got down on my knees and prayed.
Then I stood up and reached for the sky and said "Dear God,
I know that I've made some mistakes lately.
I know that I've done things I shouldn't do and said some things that didn't represent you..
But today is a day that begins anew and I know this is a bit delayed,

but today, I give you myself.
I’m no Hercules and I can’t offer much  
but i’m loving and caring and in need of such guidance from you my lord
I give you my life at the tip of a sword *** I know you’ll take it with care and guide me with your word.
You created me with purpose and with purpose you’ll lead
me to where I am truly supposed to be
I surrender me."

I love surprises!
Well, most of the time,
if they fall in line
with what I had in mind.

And should that surprise me?
Should it be so?
That something unexpected
is not something I will know?

The way life has gone
and the way it will go
is that God will surprise me,
no matter what I sow.

God's surprises will be
unexpected and so
my mind devised
that though I may love it or not,
should I be surprised?

Far flung freedom
feels feverish,
a fierce fire
burning brightly,
but both bear burdens of
pursuing purposeful pain
pinned to people pondering
for future father's from families
far flung from fire
and each other.

The wind lifts the leaves from the ground
And takes along my thoughts on a flee
They’re up in the air and so far out
Able to conquer the world without me

I sit on the park bench staring
At my own ability to fly
Holding myself back to follow
My dreams as they reach for the sky

Hoping that one day autumn will
Join forces with what I want to be
Pushing the leaves back to the ground
To unite and form a pair of wings for me

i built a house on flower petals
the voices grew high around me
winter, spring, fire, fall,
the plants withered in the summer heat

the vines grew high around me
i tried to find a pattern but
the plants withered in the summer heat
my home was just funeral pie and soot

i tried to find a pattern but
there was too much to see
my home was just funeral pie and soot
my vision burned all i could be

there was too much to see
but my tears can feed my daughter's field
my vision burned down all i could be
but the future will not be forsaken