Broken beyond repair
Someone call the doctor
The lights slowly dimming
The picture fading

Fearing this is the end
She looks in the mirror
hoping to see a smiling face,
but staring back was the cracked
image of what was

Broken beyond repair
Those lights now a soft glow
of yesterday
That beautiful picture now
black

the flash of a camera
is a tumultuous thing
a blink of light
a subtle ring
behind your eyes
as you blink in surprise
shying away
from the flash of a moment to stay
immortalized on the tiny screen
no guessing however unforeseen
you pull your cheeks
you face feels tight
only the smile you chose when you saw the white
in the blinding vortex
of a camera light

Sext: do you remember what my nails felt like, digging into your back?

If only you were here
Oh
The pictures we would take
The beauty
Of moments
Barely captured
For a split second
Because life
Seems better
Than the actuality of it
Through a lens
Doesn't it?

run, run
     run, run
            run, run
                 run, run,
                           far
                              far
                           ­      away

                                     because we
                                          both know
                             here, we
                       do not
                 belong,
                      and maybe
                            that is why
                      when you and i
                look at the
                           trees we
                                   see lyrics
                     rather than
                                     l
                                        e
                     ­                     a
                                          ­   v
                                                 e
                                                     s
                                                        .
     ­                                                     .

I pull out your picture
Smooth skin and hazel eyes
Even in photographs they hypnotize
Calling my name in whispers
Pounding at my *****
Electric shocks to the groin
Waking the senses
Feeling revived
Revitalized, alive
There, ever unchanged
Your gaze upon mine
Motionless, emotionless
Frozen, in time
When you realized I was she
Perfection
Unwavering
An alternate reality
Returning affection
A two way street of romantic love
Unseen. Unnoticed. Unrealized
Yet real just the same
Innocent, unthinking
With no one to blame
Knowing you want me
That you always did
Nothing but glimpses
Of an awkward kid
Turned man
Turned desire
Lascivious by design
Liquifying resistance
Wasting no time
A bit of shy
A hint of coy
Vanish all remnants
Of that innocent boy
By the light of the screen
I lay here
Alone
Feeling the heat of you
Making me moan
Desire unabated
I finish unsated
Abusing your picture
In ways you condone

She lived in that white mansion
Up up on the tar hill
All her life she was wrapped in it
Look closely to find her
Between Christmas trees and patio
Spinning under them wishing so hard
She was a fairy and prayed for a wing
Late evening, she creeped under
this tree she doesn't even know
the name of it
Molding foods out of sands
Driving in a plastic car with her feet
Accidentally her right foot was under the car tyre
But kept trying to drive past this root from this big tree
Crossing over drains so gracefully

She told me the good times
When people praised
That she could write her own name on a markerboard
Or when people said she was pretty
In scarves even though
She looked like hell
She told me it reminds her
Of Fleet Foxes 'White Winter Hymnal' lyrics
With scarves of red tied around their throats
To keep their little heads
From falling in the snow
Her scarves was all red too with ribbons pinned on it
That she regret losing it now

Right back when she could wear dresses
Without remarks from her mom
That it felt good when people don't talk
About her hair that is bad everyday
Chocolates were shared without even a thought that she did not want it
Turtles can be kept because there
Were still aquariums
But they went missing the next day
Just like her hamster named Michael
Also this cat she left at a fish market a few time
But got back home like there's a GPS, itinerary and atlas all in its head

When her dad had to work until daylight
She will have to sleep upstairs with mum
In that little space there are microphones of which
She sang songs that find ways until 3 lanes behind her house
She hated the smell of the sofas
She wasn't afraid of heights but
Everytime she looked outside the windows she just get the chills
At nights engines revving on roads
Passing by frightened her so much

Once a burglar got into the room
Where her aunt sleeps in
When dad was working she slept to the room next to her aunt
At 4:00 she heard a distant cry
Up to this day, she doesn't like
The holes on the bathroom walls
She said she could feel someone
Watching
And still there's this trail of size 7
On the white wall under the window
Images of a flower *** moved to the front door
To stop us from running away,
that *******

Now she is out of her own
Beautiful tragic cage
Now she can be found beside this road
Her last step out of the black gates was no tears
I can still feel the echoes from the pictures of her mansion
Like a phantom limb hanging
The air that surround the mansion now
Is straight out of hell
The fog like a poltergeist in her head
Making sounds and moving things
Oiling cogs in my head
And sow the longing deep underneath
To come back in summer and search for her red scarves

A frigid night--
the frosty air.
I shiver in the wake..

My fragile, numb fingers
attempt to touch my face.

I'm frozen....

The crisp, biting wind
gusts violently toward me..

I exhale a visible breath
and trudge onward
over the frozen lake.

Step into my minds eye, feel your hand on your chest and feel nothing and nothing
The world is a screaming rippling blur, a dropped boulder in a pond, someone has asked you to repeat yourself, you still talk to fast
Water stills and you are blinded by joy and pride someone laughs at that thing you said
The sun and the moon are running opposite races, the speed of light is the speed of a word, darkness rushes in, thought wishes it was faster
A hole jumps into your mouth at the sound of voices, hammers on gongs bring you to your knees
"your father is on the phone"
"I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt you"
"I need you to drop me off"
"I'm sorry there is nothing we can do for her anymore"
"You look just like him"