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I was dying
Last night,
Under the covers of my sheets.
The waves of hurt were crashing into me.
I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t breathe.

I called out to you, helpless,
“Please, save me, please!”
I cried for you, I cried for you.

“Heyy” - 10:17 PM

I cried for you, I cried for you.
I needed someone to lift me out of the sea,
To save me from my hurt,
To relieve me from the pain;
The pain of the crashes of the waves of everything
And nothing.

I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t breathe.
Where were you? Where the **** were you?
I needed you so badly,
I needed somebody, anybody.
All I needed was a “heyyy” “hii”, or even a funny cat GIF
Anything, anything to tell me that you were there,
That there was someone who would respond to my message at 10 PM
Someone who would hear my cries and serve as my anchor from this ocean of pain.
But no, nobody.
I was drowning,
I was dying.

I cried myself to sleep
Last night.

“Sorry” Too long after AM

Every
Single
Night
I am dying.
But I just can’t seem to ******* die.
Kay Nelson Oct 17
i write my comfort wearily at night
the gooseflesh brought upon my skin by cold
a broken screen, the splintering of glass
all held together by a feeble glue

i find it easy to forget my place
within the realm of things that really are
at midnight, maybe past an hour or three,
when white noise drones within my empty skull

they ache, my eyes, and tether me to earth
one second gone consumes the midnight whole
the crowbar glow is wedged between the lids
the fading world resigns to pure mirage

in hours' time, the cycle will repeat
my sense of who i am will surely ebb
first post, im proud of this one
Ariannah Oct 3
I can accept the feeling
Even tho it breaks my heart
I can accept the feeling
But ill never get the answer to why
I am like this when he's with you

I can accept the feeling
Or at least that's what I tell myself
Cause I can't escape tears and the pain they put me through

I can accept the feeling
I'll let it eat me alive
I can accept the feeling
Maybe that's why I feel numb..?

I can accept the feeling
But I would never accept the pain
Cause it turned my sadness into fifty different shades of grey

And I will accept the feeling
Of failing the things I wish the most to come true
And I'll let it devour me
Like I never let anything through
To get to my feelings and to help me keep you

So I will accept the feeling
In order to keep on having you
I learned to accept the feeling
When I most needed to

I learned to accept the feeling
Just to understand what I'm going through
It wasn't nice, it wasn't easy

But I learned to accept the feeling
Even tho it brought me pain
I learned to accept the feeling
Just so I don't lose you
Robert Oct 3
Alone I stand, an image of a child stares back at me. He seems so familiar, but I know he couldn't be. His smile so joyful, his eyes so serene. It feels like he and I are one and the same, but there's such a difference inside and between us. The image, so surreal, so keen, begins to fade. Suddenly, I'm left with the reflection of myself and my numb expression. Then I wonder, if I am that child, and that child is me. Where did I lose my happiness, and when did I stop being the child I used to be?
H AE MZ Sep 24
I look out, to see nothing
Only shadows that refuse to speak.
I look in, to feel nothing
As if my soul forgot how to breathe.

Once, I held hope in trembling hands,
A flame that flickered in the storm.
But winds of sorrow snuffed it out,
And left me cold, without a form.

Now i drift, untethered, unsure,
As a stranger to life I knew.
Is there a path beyond this dark?
Or is my fate to just pass through?

I've made the changes, stitched the seams,
A patched up heart, but no relief.
For what is better if hope is gone?
An empty vessel that holds my grief.

The days move on, yet I remain,
A drifting form, caught in between.
I reach for light beyond the dark,
But linger where no hope is seen.

So I exist, without a dream,
No spark to guide me through the night.
I wander through the haze of time,
A fading star, devoid of light.

Will hope return, or is it lost?
A question I may never know.
But even in this endless night,
I'll keep moving, slow and low.
"Where Am I Going" is a deeply personal poem that captures my own  sense of being lost, both internally and externally. Using imagery of shadows, storms, and fading light, I express feelings of numbness, grief, and the absence of hope. Even though I've made changes in my life, I recognize that without hope, those changes feel futile. I'm still searching for meaning, drifting in uncertainty, unsure if I'll ever find the answers I am looking for. Despite the darkness, there's a quiet resilience in me, as I keep moving forward—slowly and without clear direction. The final stanza leaves the question of hope open, reflecting my ongoing journey.
Malia Jan 17
I am too rational
To fall apart completely
Like a crumbling leaf
In the autumn breeze
But here I am.
I am a piece of machinery
With a faulty circuit board
With a touchy circuit breaker.
Tiny signals
Trigger a robust response
Because anything larger
Exceeds my design limitations.
Joshua Phelps Sep 2023
I want to trade my days
Away for
Something better.

I want to let go
Of the light
So I can repair,

Falling in the
Black, desolate,
Void and

Stuck in this
Never-ending
Fixation on
Despair.

I wish I didn’t care,

But a part of me
That died left the
Feeling that lingers on,

And now I’m numb
and in disrepair.

With every new perspective,
I wish that I didn’t let the past
Pull me in every direction.

I know there’s no reason to
Focus on the matters

But all I see is old reflections.

Hearts drift away,
And I remember
Just like it was yesterday.

Memories are never
Gone, but sparks
Get crossed, and now I’m
dead and gone.

I wish I didn’t care.
I wish I could repair.

But right now,
I’m feeling numb,
And in disrepair.
A M Ryder Aug 2023
In a senseless
Explosion of
Sound, you are
Reduced to a
Crawling thing
On the margins of
A disintegrating
World with a
Lush numbness
And peace that
Lulls the mind
Making death
Seem so easy
Malia Jul 2023
I’m not here
All the way so I
𝑷𝒊𝒏𝒄𝒉 my skin
Between my nails to
Try and 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 something but it’s
Like 𝒌𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 a stone and
𝑾𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 if the rock 𝒉𝒖𝒓𝒕𝒔.
don’t worry, I’m okay
Josephine Wild Jun 2023
I feel that my presence as a human
isn’t needed much.
I don’t contribute much to life.
I’m slow at making lunch.
I’m not a big help ‘round the house.
I don’t make much money,
and I’m surely not an ideal spouse.

What is my purpose?
Bringing people joy?
That’s about all I offer.
I am just a toy.

I’m creative, but does it matter?

I’m athletic, but does it matter?

I’m resilient, but does it matter?

My presence on earth won’t last forever.

I’ll just become dirt again.
When I do,
then maybe I will matter.
Feeling worthless
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