Bored on the internet, so see what I find.
I'm taken back to that moment in the past
When I met the droop-eyed star and starlet.
Look what Twitter has. Their pale face framed
and recreated, pixel perfect, inundated.
Talking in circles.
Talking highly of
Your self --
Like you're above the tower seat of power,
In the clouds. You're a mental case. How
you gonna love yourself so much?

Golden brown or yellow livered
a field of blows await
Spring to be delivered
as waters turn from
snow to dew
Your yellow crown peeks and pushes through
over summer's flowers bloomed too soon
underneath Your shadow wilt and swoon
as long as roots can drink their fill
remain reflecting in Your windowsill
Echoing I'm your Daffodil

i wonder if the need to talk about myself comes from the stars;
narcissism is a common trait in all three of my signs,
taurus, leo, and scorpio;
or it could be the fact that i'm an artist;
a person who tells their own story over and over through means of different media.
i've always said that artists are narcissists,
we come built with an inherent fixation on ourselves,
an insatiable desire to fill the world with us;
we need to be seen, need to be heard, need to be felt.
but i'm not so sure if that's it.
artists, we want to be known for our work;
i want that, and i want to be known for me.
i want to be thought of when i'm not around,
i want someone to hear something and think of my face.
i want to talk someone's ear off.

i live my whole life in a jar;
i don't speak much,
and i'm often too quiet to be heard from behind the glass.
can the world be about me, for a minute?

i can't control how people see me inside this jar,
i can't control the weather,
or the future.
i have no control over anything at all;
can i explain myself?
can i explain?
can you hear me?

The Narcissist

Attention is the oxygen that feeds this phobic mind
Abandonment is death to them, they'll not respond in kind
Ignore them at your peril, adore, or see their wrath
Their self is false and hollow, they’re only worth is death!

You’re adoration gives them life, dependent on approval
They’ll laugh at you but not themselves, their temperament is cruel
He’ll goad and taunt and torture you, he’ll take you to the brink
It’s me; I’m mad and paranoid, that’s what he’ll make you think.

But if you dare reject them, they try to rip you down
They cannot stand to be the ****, or lose their bogus crown
Their ego is but all they are and you supply the rest
They look to you for solvency, will **** you’re dying breath!

Get Rid!

Humans accept the love they think they deserve...
and I hate myself.

Maybe that's why I always stayed.

I enjoyed the pain...
Thriving on the punishment... I abused myself,
so it never mattered if you joined in on the fun.

I crave the hurt...
desperate to feel anything at all,
the pain is better than endless nothingness.

Toxic yet addicted,
ruined yet held together... yours to destroy.

Over inflated view of self,
Need to see what others see.
To know the real person you are,
Closely look who reflects back at thee.

Don't just live in that self-made bubble,
It will eventually close in on you.
Better to include few wrong others,
To make you more aware of your troubles.

Even though this world is cruel,
You anyway are not entitled.
So be humble of your fragility,
Accept that you need the humility.

The whole life is contradictory,
Right and wrong are subjugatory.
You never know what is in store,
Better to have few people ashore.

A life with only 'I',
Ain't it narrow and purely a lie?
The truth will only be revealed
When two fates are eventually sealed.

We are merely a speck in the universe,
Which is by the way doesn't revolve around you!
The moment you see over this fact,
A more humbling world is right before you.

Let go of the self and the ego,
Be one with others and the world.
You will step into a universe,
Which you thought was beyond your grasp....