WHY DID I EVER THINK YOU COULD BE MINE WHEN WE ARE LIKE THE OCEAN AND THE SHORE, CONSTANTLY CRASHING ON EACHOTHER BUT NEVER HARMONIOUSLY FLOWING THROUGH THE SAME WAVES AND WHY DID I LET YOU LET ME FEEL SPECIAL WHEN I KNEW YOU WOULD SLASH MY HEART AND CHAR MY INSIDES WITH YOUR SWEET LIES AND SOFT HELLOS THAT WOULD EVENTUALLY LEAD ME TO MY DEATH

I saw you yesterday for the first time in months and oh god your eyes still shine with the same glitter and your smile is still as lively as ever and I never exactly pictured us speaking again but oh my god do I hope you could see the way my face lit up when you peaked around the corner

and if you are still the way you have always been, you're the lucky ones because most of us have taken ourselves apart down to the very molecules we are made up of and rearranged them to someone else's liking

and if you are still happy then you're the lucky ones, because most of us are so depressed we are willing to lather our stomachs in alcohol and burn our throats with smoke for fun, or to forget that person who made us feel like we were sitting in a haystack of needles, stabbing and wounding every inch of our skin

and if you still strive for your highest hopes and dreams, then you're the luckiest ones, because most of us settle for less, and only climb the ladder until we think we have reached the top

and if you're in love, you really are the luckiest of all, because we are all mostly bitter over those we have lost, thinking we are unable to find someone that will bring us the same happiness that the other person used to bring

Tears rush down my cheeks
My nose runs
I desperately scrounge for Kleenex
You stand and stare awkwardly
Unapologetic for your cruelty

You're safe for now; I'm still crying
But once this flood stops
And I figure out exactly how much is your fault
You'll die

I still have ten seconds of bawling

You have ten seconds to run

Run to Ecuador and become a drug dealer

******* the Yakuza in Kyoto

Double cross a gang of Trinidadians

Become an alcoholic gold miner

All of these are less consequential than what I plan to do.

Any place is safer than in front of me, so you'd best be fleeing.

Ten seconds *******.

I heard your name today.
It sent shameful chills down my spine.
How can something so full of life feel so cold.

I thought about you a little bit after.
It made me smile.
I could feel each laughing memory on my lips.

I was happy, but it hurt.

I like to only remember the good times,
But I need to remember all the bad to remind myself why.

I never knew a person could make me feel so guilty for their own mistakes,
But you were amazing at it.

I had always been one to stand up for myself until I met you.
Never had I ever felt so small until I took a stand right next to you.

I can see you in my mind.
You branded yourself and then you left me.
Left me to feel the flames all by myself,
Left me to hear all my demons without a defense,
Left me to ponder every action and every mistake.
Maybe it was all my fault.

No.
It wasn't my fault.
******* for making me think so.
******* for manipulating me,
Making my think you were someone you weren't.
I could blame the monsters in my head,
but you were the real monster.

You are the evil that entered me.
You are the drug you encouraged me to take.
You are the hysteria I let myself travel with.

how mad are you
from 1 to 10?

2 is the guy that
despite being left-handed
always puts first the right foot shoe

6 is the woman that
like a little girl
can not step the joints between the pavement

9 is the man that
has full arguments with his inner self
and then write poems about it


we all are a little bit mad
mentally unstable
remains to know
in which numbers should we stick the label

**** its been years since this thoughts had popped in my head
some of them were good , some were bad, some caused my life to be dead
i cry from tears of joy, sadness, and anger
sometimes i can really put my life at at a risk, at danger
so many dates, and still its a gashly fade
wouldn't be myself if it wasn't for the memories i made
i saw my mom cry for the endless addings of the problems
i saw her giving me her hand when i said i don't know how ill slove them
i saw my nephew being born again and again until i see the signs
im stuck in addiction, and i cant figure out why?
i saw the cop chasing me down to a dead end stop, until i got to the ground
i saw myself lookin at my stupidity luaghting at everything around
i dont see a childhood, and i cant see my future
but i can say what i am know , i need the help, a injection with a cure
i dont sleep and don't eat and only cried about a few times
i still see myself on the corner street asking for nickels and dimes
im sorry mom i love you, i committed the hugest mistake
but this situation isnt just a piece of cake
i see my self walk and talk about gibberish crap
i dont like this stupid cheessy unsexual rap