I found myself and lost you.
I let go of your hurt,  found my strength anew. Picking my pieces up off the floor,  realizing you mean nothing anymore.  You were an addiction,  a haunting,  an affliction.  A monster terrorizing me,  and my pride that had given up helping me, depriving me and calling it love. And there are sometimes I'm completely ashamed, my strength in vain.  Because I'll look for you...the monster under my bed that hasn't yet truly left my head.

The river of time keeps on flowing
I'm standing here in the knowing
All things will pass and fall away
As we flow from day to day

But the memories seem to remain
Be it happy ones, or the ones that torture our brain

Be it the rivers smooth ride
Or around the bend where rapids hide
To stay in the boat is the greatest challenge
For sometimes things become so unbalanced

Sometimes we are thrown overbord
Most of the time not of our own accord
As we try to keep our heads above the waves motion
Trying not to drown in all the heavy emotion

Sometimes all we can do is hold on to the boat and get dragged along
Other times we're firmly planted dry and warm in the boat singing our hearts song

But whatever waters we transverse
We all know time will do it's worse
It's not the trails we will be judged by
Or even how much we cry
We'll be judged by how we responded to the storm
What eventually becomes the norm

How time changes us inside
If we get angry, spiteful and mean, or if a heart is opened and we try
To help our fellow man
To lean on each other so we both can stand

So try to enjoy the river of times flow
Sitting there watching through the glass the sand steadily go

the tips of my fingers bleed
sore feet crack beneath me
there is no one holding on

iron trees
everything you love so dearly
the tips of my fingers bleed out

i am hurting
and there is no one holding on

I hate getting drunk, because I think of you.

I hate getting sad, because it started with you.

I hate thinking of you, because I cant stop thinking of you.

I hate shedding tears, because Im sad for you.

I hate when my mind drives, because it races towards you

I hate when people ask if Im ok, because I know the answer is because of you

I'll never love again, because I'll never love anyone but you

I hate smoking green, because it would remind me while I drift

I hate sitting still with my thoughts, because theres too many of you

With this liqour, green or sadness it'll all surround you.

You would swear you were the greatest thing to this world

But only because I made you that way.

I love getting drunk, because I think of you

I love getting sad, because it started with you.

I love thinking of you, because I can't stop thinking of you.

I love shedding tears, because I'm sad for you.

I love when my mind drives, because it races towards you

I love when people ask if im ok, because I know the answer is because of you

I'll never love again, because I'll never love anyone but you.

You made me a bitter broken soul
But my stubborn heart won't let you go