I used to filter my words and actions to meet other's demands. Thankfully, I've gained confidence in who I am.
Because, I would rather be myself, frankly.
I'd rather have my flaws than yours and boast about my imperfections than pretend to be this socially acceptable girl.
Trust me, I'm far from perfect. This I know.
And I'd rather be that than put up a show.

I used to crave for acceptance, but instead I felt pushed away by cliques and clichés, realizing that pretense came with no gains.
Now the filter is gone, and I'm sticking with those who've been with me all along. I choose to be myself today. My life is better like that anyway.

Then the day came...
The day when I realize-
I realize that I'm not living anymore-
Jusy trying to survive

...Might not even trying
Just for the future
... Just hoping

he was once a boy
a face in the crowd
which brought me no joy

we talked once or twice
didn't mean a thing
timing not right
I was else where
dreaming of someone else
who didn't want me on their shelf

so this boy whom I didn't feel for
liked me just so much more
but I couldn't see
him so perfectly
for I was looking elsewhere
at one who didn't care

...so this boy told me I was looking in the wrong place
and I couldn't see the beauty in his face
my mind still caught on someone else
I was stupid to not see
who it was that may have been right for me

for the boy that cared
I didn't have those feelings shared
but time went on
I stopped dreaming of the guy that was wrong
and started friending this guy that felt for me

though he had gotten a girlfriend
he became my best friend
and I'm getting close to this boy who once wanted me
but now he's taken
and I sit around crying
about a boy who once felt for me
about a boy who now isn't loving me

We called ourselves the heroes of tomorrow,
not knowing we were living our today-s
in all the wrong ways

There was once a boy I sat with in science,
He couldn’t tell the difference between a Bunsen burner and a kitchen appliance.
I didn’t like him and he didn’t like me,
This forced upon seating arrangement made neither of us happy.
I found him arrogant, a pain in the ***,
He had no motivation and didn’t care for a pass.
Yet others still saw him as something of a god,
I still couldn’t stand this full of himself sod.
He questioned me why? I gave zero *****,
And I told him, you’re rude and clearly lack wits.
He seemed so surprised, not knowing what to do,
He simply replied "I’ll work on you"
And too my amazement he started to try,
I couldn’t understand for the life of me why?
He asked me questions about my life and my day,
Seeming genuinely interested for what I had to say,
And we started to work more together in class,
Maybe he’s not such a pain in the ***.
My respect began to grow for him,
As what I see now is far more genuine.
Then one day he sat down and said,
Looking down at the table his cheeks turning red,
"I had to work really hard for you,
You weren’t another beggar lined up in a queue,
But I’m glad you made me work for this friendship,
With all of your sassy comments and giving me lip,
Because I feel like now you like me for me,
Not the pretty boy most people see."
I replied with something I never thought I would say,
I’m so glad I was made to sit with to you that day.

-NCx

No one could be red
Quite like her, a crimson-
Caped gal full of rogue
Thoughts like fire storms
That burned for revolution.
If I wasn't so afraid of setting
My dry-leaf life ablaze, we'd
Be more than just two grey
Facebook users playing the
Block game. But from those young
Days and long nights, the vague
Inklings of camaraderie linger. I
Remember her velvet soul, a fine fabric,
Tough and royal but always
Twisted. She kept roses in her
Wild hair but thorns in her
Tongue. Light refracted through
Her ruby body, beaming out every
Color of the human psyche,
But all I remember was the red.
Perhaps I saw the blood in her
Lips, the glow of passion, the
Spark of something I couldn't yet
Understand. Perhaps I was nothing
More than my fears. Perhaps I
Simply mistook her for a mirror.

Graduation came early in the month of June

I stood in line, waiting to enter the room

You were right there, beside me with a look of gloom.

you asked out loud, "do i really need to wear this [cap] the whole time?"

and i was the only one to answer, "of course! we're graduating."


I watched you the entire time, clapping louder than everyone when you were called.

However, unlike my cacophonous clapping. I remained silent, even though every fiber of me wanted to tell you,

**I've been in love with you since junior year.