Your voice used to warm my heart.
The sound takes me back,
All the way back to the start.
When my body was brand new,
I truly could not see through,
I always let them have their way.
I said no,
And you pressed on,
But not paying much attention,
To my pleas.
Other protests went unheard,
Never escaped my mouth,
The lines were always blurred.
I thought I was loved,
But that was untrue.
I was being shoved,
Into a small dark place.
A place where you could do,
All you desired to.
I let you have me,
Before I knew who I was.
How beautiful those photographs are
It brings back the memories of the past
Whether its good or bad
Photographs will always be there to last
Photograps made me feel,
That people are unchanging,
Even when the person is gone,
The memory and the feelings remains unforgotten
All I can recall from my hectic childhood was a very early memory that played in my mind like a dilapidated recording tape,
Scenes flashed before my eyes, capturing my imagination as an entirety,
Lights passed by so quickly, I couldn't even keep track of what I was picturing.
It was as if a small portion of myself separated and I was tremendously taken into a dreamlike dimension,
This frightening cycle of not being able to differentiate between actuality and fantasy grew overwhelmingly rapid like the constant flood of blood running through my veins;
My attempt to wake you was so regrettably disregarded,
So control took the lead role over my body and simultaneously woke me from my hasty rest.
Shivers creep on me in the post-orgasmic ecstasy
as I light a cigarette and blue smoke crawls up my skin
Almost can feel you touching me
Giving love to my body
Inhaling the smoke brings back flashbacks of you
Suddenly we are in your room, drunk and young
I ask you to kiss me and you make me a slave
I taste you on my fingers and you taste like sin and whiskey
You pin me to the wall and we share what I thought was air
Rotten lungs and pretty eyes
My cigarettes now burn faster and you are lost in a fog
And although you destroyed me day by day
I never felt more alive
so I find myself reaching for your fire to light just one more cigarette.
Today is a rough day
I'm feeling all alone
There's some I could reach out to
But none will help me through it all
Nightmares and flashback are haunting me today
Visions of fear, helplessness and pain
Happy thoughts of mine just float away
Held back tears flow down like rain
I know those remembered time are over
Though I still feel vulnerable
No ones coming to throw me over their shoulder
But who's next to show me hell?
There's that one song
It was ours
Even if we didn't say it was
We both just knew
Whatever we had is extinct
But the song, now toxic, lives on
It makes it harder to forget
When I hear it, flashbacks replay in my head
That time I felt on top of the world
-"Trees on Fire"
Have a beer, drink and cheer,
chug it like yo mama made it
don't matter if it's barely noon
let's party till our bodies heave it.
In this town of forever children
we're suppose to be bold and reckless
our only chance to be stupid
so pop it, tap it, run it, work it,
gather the fools in their dirty best
round up the prettiest little liars
get ready to make some beautiful mistakes
Responsibilities? Duties? Homework?
Not today my friend!
They can wait, you have fun to take
and have it all day and night,
and day again
grab a partner and dance
grab a memory and hold it tight
unless you want to forget,
that's even easier!
there's a drink for that!
there's a solution for everything here
Drink it, smoke it, dance it, fuck it,
fight it, cry it, drive it all away!
Won't matter tomorrow, it's all in the game
Neverland with Rock N Roll,
waterfalls of beer and
dirty minded darlings
This is a scoundrel's heaven
there are no rules, no out of bounds
no time outs, no take backs
just take it all in,
this may be your only chance
to act like the animal everyone tells you to fear
soon you'll wish these days never ended
these might be your glory days
the days of glorious recklessness
The "Who gives a shit? We're in college" days
you're suppose to be devilish
nothing will ever be this easy to forget
nothing will ever be this easy
Bro City is Candyland for adolescents
so grab a roof top and grab a cup
you're only regret will be you took it too seriously
Celebrate, and if you must be celibate
be sure you at least enjoyed every minute that mattered.
You didn't know that my notes were actually love letters
And no matter how sad I was, you knew how to make me feel better
That every picture I drew of you was me trying to impress
And it was so hard not to watch you undress
I didn't know that our drunk kisses meant nothing to you
That all the nights we spent cuddled up watching movies was just what friends do
I buried my feelings for you
Because I knew we could never make it
It took 5 years and a lot of tears for me to finally admit
That what I felt for you... was love.
My sanity has been rung out like a soppy washcloth.
The only thing worse than the quick glances and glares is
not knowing why. Headphones can only drown out so
much and I begin to wonder how such beautiful melodies
can now haunt me to the point where the chords of “O Holy
Night” stab me in the stomach with rusty knives. Somewhere
I was once so proud to call home is now my personal hell
without any rationale. The snow resembles the ashes of my
soul as I follow the path along what once was green. The
frozen puddle on the cracked ground reminds me that it’s
hard to loathe the eyes that look back into my own. No one
ever tells you that two plus two plus a few more equals one.
Words weigh me down and suddenly I am immobile. I swallow
each thought one by one until I run and collapse over the toilet.
It’s such a shame that no one gives a damn until you’ve hit the