I can't escape from you
You're keeping me
Hidden away
Not letting me love
Anyone else
Your smile is paralyzing
Your eyes are heart-stopping
Everything you do
Brings me back farther
I can't escape from you
So why should I try
Can't run away
From the way you look at me
From the way you glance down
From the way you smirk
You're deadly
But somehow
You're keeping me alive
I'm bound
To your soul
Whether you want it
Or not
You can try to push me away
But absence makes the heart grow fonder
You're the definition
Of angelic
I can't help
But think of you
Every time
I breathe
Every step
Is meant to get closer to you
To touch your skin
Feel your lips on mine
Revel in the friction
I can't escape from you
But then again
I don't want to

In the ocean I picture an easier world
Keep me locked in a cage
You once told me I wasn't good enough
How am I supposed to find the key
Around my cage you forced me to build bricks
Now no one can free my escape
Tears burn my tired eyes

When you told me I was beautiful,
I soaked it up like sweet honeydew.

When you held my hand to your heart,
I imagined cupping it and keeping it abeat.

When you lay your head against my cheek,
I savoured the flow of your hair in my hand.

When we went to restaurants and cinemas alike,
I imagined you one day making it a date.

When I told you my fears,
You listened whilst wiping away my tears.

When you played with my hair,
I’d close my eyes and just feel the bliss,
Only the bliss.

When you touched me,
I imagined what it would feel like for you to make love to me.

When you left me,
I waited


And waited.
But you never came back.

Yearning
Tempted so
Just a drop
A little hint
A moment to flee these things
Colliding in my mind
Leaving nothing untouched

Just a second
Just a time
For one such as I
To unwind
To come clean
Then all that hear
To forget
And just love
Despite ones failure
Despite ones mistakes
Despite ones awful thoughts
To understand
To empathize
With open-mindedness
And acceptance
Beyond what can be placed into words

One slip up
One mistake
Remembered
But there are one too many
Overtaking the brain
Spewing rage from each
Onto the cause
Making all worse
Slowly killing one
Until it is no more.

- Jay M
October 8th, 2019

there is a sense of hope
i can feel it truly
don’t know where it comes from
hold on, it’s holy

nothing compares
to the lightness of being
just one little firefly
is enough for
escapes to be seen

i need to preserve it
so precious and perfect
protect it from ember
and scream: i deserve this!

Putting my hands over my ears
Intent on blocking the world's clamour
Once again alone with you
In this darkness of the voice within
Your sweet existence in my head
Saying 'I love you'
Caressing my name
Singing songs I'll never forget
For once, I just want to get lost
Carried away by things that don't exist
Forever walking in a dreamlike trance
Hand in hand with you
To this fabricated reality of our joint souls
Hallucinations, are you?

She was drown in the shadows of a past she dare not escape.

Bound by an invisable chain, anchored, and weighting her down.

In a painful comfort of dysfunction, this chain rubbed raw places in her mind.

Like an addict in her ways, kindness and happiness slipped through her open grasp, so she could wade into the familiar waters once again wrapped in her sadness.