I've opened up to the wrong people in my life now i'm completely shut down when it comes to the past ,present ,and future i move quietly azabache always with me to much evilness.

I am supposed to be happy,
but I am green with envy,
as green as the grass on the other side,
these thoughts are rotting on the inside.
Envy is an unwanted companion,
she fools me with compassion.
I have tried so hard to be content
and yet everyday I am in torment,
I see people walk through the doors
that closed for me while I lay on the floor.
Everytime I thought I found the key,
I was told it didn't belong to me.
Scared to look at my reflection,
while stuck in a cage of rejection.
I am looking for someone to blame,
tell me who is the source of this pain,
who put me here, why am I not free,
I shudder and realise,it was.. it was me.