.....I miss having your lips on mine
and your hips on mine.
     The echo of you
on me,
lives on in all my senses
     in memory

Does anyone remember when
Baseball fields were full
When you always saw a hundred kids
When you drove by every school
Pick-up games of baseball
On every field you'd pass
But now the only scrub that's there
Is just overgrown, clumpy grass

I drove on by a park today
One that I used to play baseball on
The backstop was all broken
And the dugouts, they were gone
The field was full of garbage
Weeds and echos of the past
I remembered times between the lines
With a long forgotten cast

"HEY MISTER...MOVE...WE'RE PLAYING HERE"
"CAN'T YOU MOVE SO WE CAN PLAY?"
"HEY BATTER, BATTER, SWING NOW BATTER"
"YOU'LL NOT GET A HIT TODAY"

I'd crossed into a baseball game
One from many years before
The ghosts of players long deceased
Were still playing here some more

I crossed back to the dugouts
Stepped behind and they were gone
But, as I stepped back to the old coaches box
I could hear their haunting song

"HEY BATTER, BATTER, BATTER, SWING"
"WE WANT A PITCHER, NOT A BELLYITCHER"
"HEY BATTER, BATTER, BATTER, SWING"
"WE WANT A PITCHER, NOT A BELLYITCHER"

I sat there watching the game take place
On a field not worth a ****
At least not in the present time
Then a kid hit a grand slam

He touched them all as he ran by
I saw it plain as day
The only thing I wished was that
I could join them and play

"HEY MISTER, STAND ON  HOME PLATE"
"THEN COME WALK OUT TO THE MOUND"
"WE KNOW YOU WANT TO JOIN US"
"WE KNOW IT'S HALLOWED GROUND"

I did the tasks directed
I joined the players from ago
And as I ran up to the rubber
I went as fast as I could go

I could feel myself get younger
I didn't know if it was real
But, they say as you get older
You're just as young as you may feel

I pitched two good strong innings
Then the echoes chose to fade
I knew it was just imagination
Of long lost players I had made

"COME BACK AGAIN TOMORROW"
"YOU CAN THROW THAT PELLET KID!"
"WE'VE GOT TO GET ON HOME NOW"
and...go back...you know I did!

Errant, vast, my expanses
in the depths of hypnotisms
so ancient… still so spicy…
Reverberation of distant essences
is the adamantine wake
of dreaming satellites.
I collect rainbow sparks,
exalted
by craters of inlaid borders.
I would feel a silky tinkling
echoing in my throat,
but without a key,
the unknown does not reveal the intent
of me put down on this world...

There are echoes in my bones that shake me to the core, but all I have to offer is the whisper from my lips.

From my lips, the sound that escapes me the silent cry of a million aggrieved souls.

From my lips, the sound earth shattering in its own right, but unheard by all.

From my lips, the remnants of the shouts cast into the mountains of my mind.

They crawl like centipedes in my thoughts
So many feet crawl inside as each step is
Falling like tears on my reflection so do
Words echo not of my own conscience.

Words repeat, heeding their twisted wanting's
Never gathered upon my shores. But waves
Realise eagerly on my shores eroding my
Minds cliffs falling into unclear thoughts.

Confused vision of a sight now seen, not through
The perception of one but many that are witnessed
On the feeling that is entwined  in many confused
And different thoughts. My voice needs to be heard.

I am one in the pool of many but I must swim alone
In a sea of sharks. Each wishing to take a bite, but
Never getting close enough. I went fishing caught
All that were there, now they swim in a tank in solitude.


They call to me, but I never feed them in .confined waters
They now swim And my subconscious is free of whispers
That flooded my thoughts. I heard many voice echoing
Within, but now they are echoes shadows disappearing.

**"My thoughts are echoes of me, but sometime I fear their not,

Can you hear me?
The echo bouncing and traveling through your mind,
Have I lost stance within your graces?
Or like me,
Is there still more to find?
I know your soul,
Just not to its full extent this time.
Will I remain within your kind love?
Or be pushed out without a second rhyme?

I'm a puzzle waiting to be solved. Complicated. That jumbles their minds. A puzzle with my broken pieces scattered all along the lanes and roads on the map of my dark dark life. They try to find my fragments and they fail. I'm built of shattered words of hope tripping on trails of self doubt.

And with strangled emotions ricocheting against the walls of my soul. The hollow echoes of those sweet lullabies that reverberates through my mind, making no definitions, leaving me empty.

And it's only numb pain rebounding within my veins. As they crack open my walls of security. All there eyes scruntinize me under their cruel disgusted gazes as I slump to ground and shiver, bleeding my wounds again and again.

I can't be who I am.

And after a million lost battles I surrender.

And accept its only darkness that defines me.