I love you is the heaviest and vastest sentence I know.

I spend my days trying to work out if im being crushed under it.

... Or drowning in it.

I open my eyes.
I’m drowning.
Dark water surrounds me,
I can feel them.
I see nothing but water but I can feel them watching me.
Laughing at me.
I can’t breathe.
My lungs burn.
I can feel their gaze on my skin.
I can’t do it.
I have to breathe.
It goes dark as the water fills my lungs.

floating...
white noise...
coldness...
so bright...

numbness...
closed eyes...
speechless...
too much...

white clouds...
vast skies...
bound here...
can't fly...

smiling...
hurting...
frozen...
lying...

moving..
stilln­ess...
turning...
falling...

so weak...
so sick...
so meek...
so wrong...

"be busy"...
"be something"...
I get it...
I'm nothing...

nowhere to go...
running away...
I wish for...
a gentle place...

dreamless...
wretched...
childish...
end this...

"move on"...
"can't die"...
who decided that...

breathing,
drowning;

loving,
killing;

crying,
living;
­
crowded,
lonely;

what's the difference

Take a deep breath
they say it'll help
but I don't know how

Even if I did
how could I breathe
when I'm drowning
under the waves

Stress
           Stress
                       Stress
It never ends
Just continues
Due to
Family
            School
                        Friends
                                     Depression
                                                         Expectations

                                     STRESS

It weighs on your lungs
Suffocating
Drowning and going
Down the
        W
            H
           I
        R
           L
        P
      O
         O
       L
of stress

They say our body is compiled of 60% water, and everyone runs around preaching self care but my glass is metaphorically full but physically empty.
I can’t stomach another drink and I’m starting to to feel like I’m drowning.
I’m overflowing from the inside out.

Is there anything in the world
sadder than unrequited love?
I’m not talking about romance;
that’s a completely different story.

But I mean loving someone
so deeply only to find
they barely think of you.

Missing someone so much
and crying yourself to sleep
only to find they get annoyed
when you reach out to them.

Craving their love and attention
only to find they think you’re needy.

This. This feeling. This is what I believe
is the equivalent to swallowing sand
every time you talk to that one person.

Breaking apart inside and drowning
as you slowly realize you are nothing.
Nothing special to the one you hold dear.
That is what I consider unrequited love.