final option: exit in sight
shall i walk this way?

rachel, eva and samuel being in the room
my tribewords for what i consider family

final option: exit in sight
shall i walk this way?

while you are remaining in this room of memories
while samuel is crying
while eva is sobbing
rachel - dem kid's mother - being desperate

you know what rachel?
we are akin to each other
like characters in sentences:
dots

unlike the undertones of
exclamation marks and exclamation points

samuel is crying
eva is sobbing
cause you guys are in another city
far away

you sent me a message:
"i have to protect the children"

tell me:

from whom?
from what?

estimate: how many fathers does a child have?
spell out how
man and woman
wife and husband

become able to defend and favor their
shadows lips and wishes

is there any meaning?
am i flaying my skin daily?
i am not a snake
i am darkness and light
like the rest of us
bizarre billions made of
languages moral values religions

do i have to skin myself daily?
does this have to mean even a bit?

i don't know bambina
but i am sensing that we are ONE:

blood boomerangs bound
boomerangs bound blood
blood bound and boomerangs

the devil cracked our bound
he grinned and said:
"my lost son i am
looking at you: a man full of doubts

ain't no thang though
i am confirming on oath:
i will be getting rid of your doubts
colorfully
they will be gone

we just need a gimmick

hereby i am passing on the golden goblet to you
there is some stuff in it
to be found in lies and magic"


young jeezy (me ok)

harold hunter (kids, larry clark)

falco (rock me amadeus)

ali (mobster)

dmx (my ******)

fassbender (angst essen seele auf, in englisch: fear eats up your soul)

robin williams (comedian?)

benjamin von stuckrad-barre (writer and addict)

whitney houston (who was really crying?)

angelina jolie (in the land of milk and honey)

sigmund freud (will you lead me to the origins of golem?)


they daily drank from the goblet
the list of my friends is long and enduring

some of 'em died
some continued to live
some decayed with numb limbs
in musty chambers
closed curtains

glossing ghosts above the head of
west indian archie
once a powerful gangster now a broke burnout

but this is one of many countless chapters
my son
ain't we good together boy?

i am confirming on oath:
i will be getting rid of your doubts
colorfully
they will be gone

successful people drink from the goblet;
they are in charge of their lifes
my son

the golden goblet is like heat in the coldness
the golden goblet is like cooling down in the heat of the desert

water
purity
nature and leaves
chemistry and magic

my friends are global
my friends are cosmopolits
by the time some lose the "r" on their path:
they become fiends

but this is one of many countless chapters
my son
ain't we good together boy?

all cultures
all religions
all languages

all my friends love the golden goblet
more than themselves
cause the golden goblet procures them

dear deception

all my friends don't love themselves anymore
but the golden goblet
all my friends don't love themselves anymore
but the golden goblet

devils hang out beyond rehab centres
they listen to the
conversations of addicts
they want to figure out their weaknesses
analyze and exploit them

devil flapped his arms
high up in the skies
cheating god's position
between trees and snowwhite castles in bavaria a state of germany

while the devil was listening to the addicts he held
the golden goblet under the moon's reflections thereupon

the golden goblet was ablazed with light
like a constellation superior to the earthly ghosts of weakness
the golden goblet sparkled

the addicts perceived it
as children perceive candy
as teenagers perceive the defeatable supremacy of grown-ups

they perceived the sparkling
as if you were listening to your favourite song

addiction is emotional
addiction is the blind quest for meaning

the golden goblet twinkled over the roofs of the bavarian rehab centre
and one of the addicts a young woman
looked up into the blackness of heaven
frankly speaking it was sparkling everywhere

the woman suddenly thought:
i have twins
i worked as a *******
i am not permitted to see my kids

in deliverances she spoke:
"i was a *****"
"i have twins"
"i order 'em precious clothes"

a sheen coming from the devil's
pupil
as she expressed her fate

she sighed and said:
"nut doc give me prescription... first i
don't wanna take 'em ***** though
they called (...)
and (...)
and (...)
and (...)

after slinging though" she proceeded with a shivering voice
" my feeling like gold"

her mouth opened widely as if she was hungry
golden sheen

a darkred eyebrow
vibrating ******
bald head full of

holes scars blood

since the beginning of memorizing
devil has been breeding horror:

not to mention the death of g.t.
leaving parents in a daze

not to mention the death of a.k.
leaving siblings in a daze

not to mention when a mother passed away: t.z.
leaving children in a daze

since day one devil has been embroiled in torment
born from the fight of brightness and night
the creature awoke

only in darkness
hidden by the star's twilight
beyond distances
we recognize him

when he is far away from us
like glorified past
on earth though
he embodies the shape of human beings
to be between us
to expose our weaknesses
that's his guzzling his brew and his - blessing

our failing strenghtens him
he be muscle

our illness strenghtens him
he be tizzop

Betrayal, lies and fire
All gather and conspire
None of them ever tire
In the game to ruin me.

All is dark where light go dies
Rotting flesh and buzzing flies
Acid rain and burnt-red skies
In the place where evil resides.

A hell all inside a person
Where the adversary would be found spittin’ and cursin’
Several demons mix up a death potion
A sea of red, a burgundy ocean.

Oh, and I mustn’t forget
This is the place your personality is set.

The feeling that someone watches
Everywhere I go
The feeling that someone listens
To everything I say
The feeling that I'm not alone
Even in the darkness

That Feeling haunts me day and night
And I cannot brush it off
Cannot choose to ignore it.

Because it beats at my mind
My pulse echoing along
Until I am driven crazy

Because it hums a different melody
To the one I am singing
Until I am forced to change song

Because it slithers along my skin
Fighting through the soap I layer on
Until I continue to feel *****

Because it is the very devil
Trailing after me
Chuckling at my misery
Smiling at my fury
Cackling at the guilt
That ever deepens

It's that feeling that drove me to do this
So farewell
And tell my stalker
That it was fun.

cut open the lamb
give in to your scars

there's only a whisper
to comfort your soul


wandering the lands
searching the stars

world's going to wither
back to the cold



find me in your dreams
strangle my breath

look away when i scream
you don't have to be here
with me inside my head


you're torn at the seam
in same ways as i

i'll tell you all that i've seen
only if you promise
you'll be here when i die



in the forests green
where the devil spies

will you find me there
even if i never tell you why ?

Satan only ever killed one,
     God planted the evidence.


       Falsely accused, planted sins..

Sunday never came for me.
Straight from Saturday to Monday.
No church for me, no,
I'm forsaken by God.

The devil's on my shoulder
the days are growing colder.
the nights are getting longer
Yet Sunday never comes.

I pray for a different life
I hate living in constant strife
I don't want the life that has been chosen
But Sunday never comes.

I'm not a believer
I've never been one.
So maybe that's why,
Sunday will never come.

Disintegrated wings,
Even angels fall too.
A glance up to the sky,
Caught a transcending view.

Landed on two feet,
An angel's new terrain.
Only few will sit and worship,
But most attempt in vain.

The sky was never cleared,
In fact, formations all the more.
A rabbit, a cake, an astronaut,
Even rain would still downpour.

Following in hopeful doubt,
Freedom's symbol is no chain,
Bare in mind, no change occurred,
The droplets were always acid rain.

Caught in fair deceit,
For my fault was to submit.
When glancing from the outside,
I didn't see the whole of it.

Because angels never fall,
With wings upon their back.
For a fall is cunning foolery,
And we're victims of attack.

Stuck in hypnotic values,
Our worth seemed to accrue.
But we must've forgotten the fact:
That the devil walks here too.