When the noise of exterior souls exceeds standards, I turn it off.

"Yo soy el rey"

My dominion stretches as far as my head to the soles of my feet.
And I'm walking the opposite way.

Like a genie who gets paid commission, you come to my space and exceed the noise standard.

"Yo soy el rey"

My dominion stretches as far as my head to the soles of my feet.
And I'm walking the opposite way.

They say I walk away half the time.
I get looked at funny.
I'm the local eyesore.
I swear, I'm not self-destructive.

When the moon turns crimson,
and the tide reaches the grass,
I'll say that I have the pizza you wanted.
The flavor is crowbar.
Your big head will be swollen.
God will **** you down to the flames.

"Yo soy el rey"

I swear I'm not self-destructive.

My dreams whisper sweet things
And surreptitiously speak to me
My waking words are rote and empty
-spilling with hypocrisy
Yet their comforting embrace
Simply bring smiles to my face
Filling my mind while I'm asleep

They send messages lined with silver That vanish when I wake
To bring about a dull and listless form Who is shaping my last mistake
You see I wake in a storm
Simultaneously feeling constrained
To my bed
I can't get up while there's no filter
For the rush of noises in my head

If there's a difference between
What you know and what you believe Then why is it not as easy
To imagine my reprieve
Why can I only experience a vivid life
While I sleep
Then once again wake up
To this Fear Doubt and Anger
Choking me

Invoking me by pushing buttons
Of their endless promises
To for certain be found in youth
While my vision is livid sinning
Contemplating and pinpointing
Who too close is uncouth
You sit there and feed my veins
An explanation to your lies
With all the compromised
Washed up water
Memorized methods
Coping mechanisms
While it's your heart that remains
Aloof

Then sit there in desperation
Reiterating as if you know
The deep introspective answer
When any fool can see your wisdom
Is wrought in the vanity
Of a talented dancer

If you lost the truth of sanity
Would you retrieve it for ten cents
Or would you search inside
Before hiding from the confines
Of a necessary moment
I'd rather die or sacrifice my life
Before cowering from what's hidden
The message so raw
That counts your flaws
Like there was some proof
In what is missing

But ultimately I guess
It comes down to the small decision
The chip on my shoulder
That became a boulder
When I reached out
For my inner vision.

So while I feel so disparate and alone
In the trenches losing my senses
Will I be the hero or be the villain
Will I let the poison make me it's toy
Or take the penicillin

*Some days my life feels as heavy
As that last breath left over
From how loudly I shout
But I guess a general synopsis to you
Of how I sometimes feel inside
Is a decent first step to waking up
While I'm down and out

Green was his favorite color.
He hated spinach.
It was funny, the face he made when he had to eat it if he wanted ice cream after dinner.
He loved Clifford the Big Red Dog.
He wanted a dog just like him.
He was a very sweet boy, one that everyone loved.
I loved him the most.
He was my son.
I stood over his casket and my tears dropped on his face.
I almost thought he would wipe them away for me, "Don't cry, mommy. I love you."
It wasn't his time.
He was 4.
You took him away from me.
I want him back.
Give him back to me.
Please?