How I tire of you and the looks you give me in the mirror
How I tire of bleary eyed sunny days  
(Like I can't see) sun thru smoke fog

Alone I wake, semi truck barreling down my street towards highway
Gray skies do nothing to muffle the noise in the street do nothing
About the metallic pulse in my head groaning dread like a 56k modem

My dowry for this disease of madness - my middle class inheritance
Her white wedding dress and my silymarin milk thistle distress
Equal  distance between us like 'we hardly knew ye'
But You, You were to be my wife

Where did you go, who is this woman
Eggshell grown gown olive skinned melanin beauty
How I tire of pretending to like the new you
Like the old me, he that used to be before
It got to me  - before the bottle bought and sold me
Tarnished ink blot
Instead of the other way around

Stopped the car, narrow country dirt road red
Backing up now rapidly as can go, in reverse, still too slow still
feels like too little too late, slow out of the gate as always (idiot)
No great escape from falling to saving grace
No night and day, just greater shades of gray

Damage done, iron wrought, frostbitten fingers failing me  
'Fate crusades against me'  
Yell paranoid eyeing empty white dusted bottle
Sleep paralysis nightmares of bedroom closing in prison cell
Loom over like human beast double lobectomy
Reptilian brain no higher function
Choke down tears of pure amygdala flight fear

A Beast shakes me awake.

I am lying next to you,
and I watch your chest slowly
rise,
fall,
rise,
fall,
your soft breaths even
except for
the occasional sharp inhale;

A Beast  tilts my head the other way.

I am staring into empty space,
but soon enough my brain recreates
my cacophony of thoughts,
shredded wisps of what was and what
has yet to be.
A woman with honeysuckle skin
trails her finger along my jawline,
and I melt into her.
She is not you.

A Beast makes me look into your eyes.

You're awake now,
and your eyes glint with enigma;
They flicker with something unknown
before you look away.
You are not honeysuckle.
You are as sharp as each of your
pen strokes on paper,
crisp as a newly typed  narrative,
a Colossus of all that was
and all that has yet to be.

A Beast asks me if this is what I want.
He tells me he knows the answer.

The heart of the beast is pounding, pounding, pounding

Your legs are pumping, pumping, pumping

Its growl deep and head low

Watching you, its pray

Ready to pounce at any moment

But then, whoosh, it's gone

Into nothing, thin air, emptiness

You keep going because you're scared, unaware

The edge greets you

Instincts take over and you stop

The silence is deafening

Where did it go?

How are you alive?

It only took a moment to realize that the beast is inside

And in that moment, you deside

To fight the thing with yellow eyes

Aloud you say "Come out to play."

The sword is somehow there

You grab it and fight

For love, for life, for fear

The final blow is brought down

So is a crown

You slayed the beast that ruled your thoughts

Now it's your turn

Show them who's boss

Flickering light, images flow by
of cats and vamps and wolves on the sly
the undead tango with the dead
oh.. the books I have not read.

When something happens, something small
turns the whole place withall
popcorn doesn't pop no more
it's all a matter of blood and gore.

For when in the jungle, the quiet jungle
the lion roars tonight
the baser beasts fail to mingle
and move out of MY sight!

Welcome to the malevolent
I am the intersection between Bad and Evil
The very genesis of sin
The bitten fruit
Man couldn't refrain from eating
The slick nasty sinister beast
Woman couldn't help but listen to
I am the Night with twinkles of Star lights
I am the intersection between Dawn and Darkness
I am the Temptation
Cajoling voices nagging behind your head
Mix the Filthy, the Slicky, and the Nasty.
You get me.
I am the sin
Christ came to bound
The sin lurkin' in your shadows

Half moon is hanging like an evil hook.
Im drawing your warmth in my mind.
Im a space traveller, look
I travel by closing my eyes.
My quest is full of questions.
You drew a light inside me
In that sunless summer.
In that sea of sorrow.
In the world where no one's trying to be someone.
You drew a heart in a hollow beast.
A reason to be strongest.
You drew a rope when I was falling into abyss.
You drew a promise.

The window’s left open
And yet I can't sleep

The door is shut and my fan is on
But my eyes still creep open

And that’s when I feel its hand on my stomach
I feel its breath on my face.

The great beast has crawled out of the closet
I’m just it’s snack.

The great beast snarls words I can’t understand.
It has long black nails and a large mouth.
It has the sockets for the eyes it now lacks.
It has flesh like mine and thoughts like mine

The great beast snarls again and 3 words shine through
“Me
And
You”

The great beast removes it’s hand and makes it’s way to the window
“Me
And
You”

It’s louder now and clearer. I understand that I must follow it

Through the window, to the outside with its arm around my shoulder
It snarls no more, it’s nails no longer black, and it’s eyes in its head look like mine.
It guides me to the road with a comforting sigh it let’s go.
Back it turns to the window
Back it climbs
Back to my bed where it rests its head.

For the road in front of me leads to a window
The window’s opened by another reckless soul
Their cells dying as they wish to do themselves

In the window I see my reflection.
The great beast I am.
The great beast I’ll create.