what is sand
but the finest of glass?

and what are bones
but the finest of ash?

and you may try to crush
me down into the finest of elements,

reduce me to nothingness,
******* to the wind.

but I have a talent
for rising again,

oh yes.
you cannot keep me down for long.

After Hell and back

to hear your voice

all deep and gravely

on the other end

of the phone receiver

makes all the difference



When my belly's empty

and I'm about to collapse

Oh yeah, I already did!

I called you up

biting my lip

and you answered

on the second ring

enthusiastic about

some new job thing



I'm a foodie, I said

I noticed, you answered



I'm a girl with a BIG

appetite, who cares so much

about other people's well-being

that she burns out quicker than

a single sheet of paper

to a lighter's fine flame

when the going gets rough

her thin skin gets tough

what a shame!



After hell and back

there's no more of

the same



is there…?



What's left is but the ash

stuck to the bottom

of the bin in fine dust



and after hell has burnt me

to a crisp and worry seeps in

I try to not cry

but tears invade the corners

of my eyes

stinging and ringing

a fear so contrite



but if I avoid the things

that scare me

I'll never find freedom

and that's all my charred

feet want--release from

first time jitters--



and you're real



you're actually real



and that's the scariest part of all



it really is time now

to break down my wall

Then you will suffocate me more
Till I run out of breath...
And I linger in the garden of despair and mess
Where shards of your dreams pricked my feet
Your incessant turmoil stabbed my blurry eyes
In the heavenly friction when worlds collide
Flares your flowing colours and mine died
Stillness in your stone stature remains in flow
I burned and turned to ash left hanging by smoke
You layed lasting in between death and resurgence

He always kept candles, loved
to watch their silent vigil stand
bright against shadow.
He lit them, letting himself
get lost in
their seductive mirage--
only long enough to
snap out of a haze
and extinguish the light between
his fingers.
In a way,
he lived for their death,
the curling of pungent smoke, mingling
with stale bedroom air.

But he also thrived on their rebirth--
the glowing ember, *******
breath from the smoke and
regenerating from ashes.

Always loved fire,
Daddy the matchstick, Mommy?
she was the pyre.

Between ******* the ash remains
Slowly I watch as the smoke dissipates
Just as I watched you  fade away
Slowly, slowly, day by day
You were a light
With a soot filled cough
Bright and cheery
With a lung turned black
And with every puff that I blow out
I challenge Cancer to a bout
Cruel and cold
The worst of foes
Dark and dangerous, uncontrolled
The best the worst he takes them all
But now it's time for his curtain call
So I'll beat Cancer to a pulp
Or I'll die trying 
And see you soon
                  Either one... is satisfying...

​Roses and ashes- a world is awaiting.
a mistake and you fall,
but you won’t be regretting
all the screams and the cries,
the unholy you’re creating.
Rome is falling
or burning-
there’s no difference in unmaking.