fear is a tiny seed
planted in my lower belly.
the seed sprouts suddenly,
its roots extending toward my feet.
my thoughts are consumed by the seed,
which grows into a strong, sturdy tree
whose branches wrap around me,
paralyzing my whole being.

when her heart flutters faster
than the wings of a hummingbird,
his steady heartbeat anchors her
to the solid ground underneath their feet.

even as your heart drags you through the circles of hell
and your knees buckle under the weight of life,
a soft, confident voice rouses the parts of your soul
that nudge your spirit back into its natural rhythm.
you slowly rise, feeling the ashes under your feet.

for the first time in my life, I'm not hiding.
I stand with my walls down and my heart open.
my legs are shaking, and my breathing is shallow.

he wraps his arms around me to keep me steady.
my head rests on his chest as he strokes my hair.
I close my eyes for a moment, finally able to rest.

I look at him carefully, and I see no armor.
his walls are down and his heart is open.
his legs are shaking, and his breathing is shallow.

we hold each other until our love grows roots.
then we let go, and our smiles illuminate the world.
he takes my hand in his, and we walk together.

she stood in front of the headstone,
the past whispering in her ears,
encouraging her to remember the unsaid.
her strained eyes rested for a second
as she heard footsteps quietly approaching.

she looked up at the last person she expected to see
his eyes were rimmed with pain, his face stained with tears
he took one look at her, and he crumpled to the floor.
she stared at his heart, which, for the first time,
was weakly beating on his sleeve.
dagger-like shards poked out
atop numerous bruises and scars.

she took him into her arms, closing her eyes,
caressing his heart with gentle fingers
after a while, she whispered, "you okay?" and he said,
"I saw you here for years, and I couldn't approach you.
You would leave, and I would visit this headstone
right after you, and the sins weighed me down.
I finally had the strength to approach you today.
You can leave me here - it's your choice."

she looked directly into his eyes, tears streaming down her face.
her voice broke as she said, "I'm not leaving you here.
You can release these sins and we can walk together.
You can heal your heart, and I will stand with you."
she felt his heart pounding, saw the doubt in his eyes.
she stood up and extended her hand towards him.
he placed his hand in hers and rose to meet her.
they quietly prayed in front of the gravestone,
then walked away, hands intertwined.

behind them, the spirit -
the inhabitant of the gravestone -
smiled and began her ascent,
surrounded by the purest,
whitest, all-encompassing light.

I walked around, arms always crossed,
never speaking until I was spoken to.
I kept my head down, subservient to a ruler
who knew and preyed on my every weakness.

Lately, I've been fighting back.
My arms are outstretched, accepting what comes.
I released the anchors that sank my heart for years
without waiting for anyone's approval - only mine.

My head is held high.
The ruler can't weaponize the truth anymore.
My acceptance drained the poisonous power
of the ruler's previously potent weapons.

Now I am not ruled by anyone.
Try as they might, they'll never trap me again.
I'll never let them for as long as I draw breath,
and my spirit can finally soar to the greatest of heights.

"i think i'm over you. i still imagine telling you everything, but without an undercurrent of romantic love. in my mind's eye, innocent smiles replace the longing stares. hugs replace the imagined romance. honesty replaces the moments when my tongue was tucked away within my palm.
sometimes my mind sings a sad song, which sends chills through my body and cracks my heart in the right places. the pain seeps through, and it hurts to breathe.
yet as my eyes succumb to the quiet pull of slumber, i see the light. when i wake up the next morning, my mind is clear, and my heart is free."