The moment at night. I am supposed to. I have needed to. For many years. Again and again I find myself at this point and failed.

I can blame the world, but it is I that has failed. I failed myself.

Only I am real, nothing else is real. None of you are real.

Just lines, shadows, white paper and crayon.

Good night.

What is this feeling at night?
A long drawn out cry
Hurting me
Be free, be free
Be free, be freedom
A heavy heart hurdles a beat

I can't breath - I can't breathe - I can't breathe
Help me, help me

Mom, Dad
I miss you
I even miss parts of you I never had
I miss being your son
I am the son you never had, I am a mask

It was at this point
He stopped caring about A to B
He dared to breathe
He dared to be
He cared for peace
He cared for sleep

He stared at his heart and mind until
in his bed he was blessed to be blind

He pulls a sword from a rock
And the crowd cheered
And he was worthy
And he will bring war

To those who are unworthy
.
And he will graze their fields
.
And he will burn their temples
.
He will reveal his true form, eating all the children of those who are not worthy
.

I cannot die ~ even if you carry me out of here

I cannot die ~ if you separate me from myself

I cannot die ~ if no one remembers me

I cannot die ~ if I refuse to believe it

When I looked at the night sky, I felt a deep sense of loss.

The stars, were too far away.

I packed jars into the fridge, so that they preserve all I have left when I come back.

It was a plague, a silence, that followed and sputtered life and people were scared.

But I got to see you. Goodbye.

And when I got back, I starved with little I had.