I'm sitting here eating peanut butter straight out of the jar

Thinking about how we talked the other night

How I couldn't stop laughing and how you teased me for being short

How I got offended and called you a giraffe hybrid but couldn't stop laughing

How you said I sounded like a 9 year old and I couldn't even pretend to be angry

How I thought the fact that you wrote about vultures was hilarious and how we both stayed up talking far longer than we were planning to

How when I insisted I wasn't interested for 2 hours, you insisted back for that long

How I fell asleep smiling and thinking that maybe my life was getting better after all

How I was embarrassed the next morning and pretended like it had just been a crazy shared dream, like the kind in Inception

And how you told me it was only going awkward if I let it be so

There is a knife in my hand
And I could use it-
To **** the beast inside of you
But I won't
I have to protect the human

So, who are you?

What are you like?

Who is the last person you cried over?

How stupid I was

To think that I was the one

Who could calm your chaos

He lit up matches

That engulfed my heart with fire

Leaving only ash

Forever didn't last that long

My mother's mother loved someone she didn't marry
And married someone she didn't love
Just for the sake of her own mother's approval
As I was falling asleep last night, I couldn't help but think
I would rather die before spending my life beside someone
Because it was the proper thing to do

Surrounding yourself with other people



Feigning interest day after day




Just to forget about that ONE

I've had a lot to deal with, but that's just life
Gotta learn to roll with the punches
I don't expect that I was very missed, as talent is overabundant here and, well, I consider my writing to still need a lot of refining. I did not expect to return so quickly (some of you might say two months is a long time but it depends who you're asking) but, well....I missed writing. I still wrote, of course, but I felt rather odd and sad at just scribbling things in notebooks only to collect dust later. If even one person finds one of my poems enjoyable, then it was worth posting. Anyway....here I am. I apologize for the sudden spam, I just...I needed to get some things out. You know how it is. You all do. I apologize for the language used in a few of my recent ones but I have always had a problem with keeping my vocab clean. HelloPoetry is a lovely website, and being able to contribute to the poems here is an honor. I did and do still feel that. It's good to be back, HP. Although, I will mostly just write and post poems and do minimal socializing, as..well, midterms are quite time consuming and finals are approaching as well.

I hesitate for a moment
This is how my mother must have felt
When she was a girl and there were wars
Going on and she would sit in the darkness
Only being able to hear the sound of death
Yes, I think I can survive this
Like she survived that

She has a quiet heart and gentle soul.

But if you push her far enough, you'll see the part of her that is fierce and determined.

The part of her that steps in when she can't take it anymore.

I want to write a poem
But I’m not a poet anymore
I can’t breathe words and turn them into dioramas that people look at and admire
I can barely read without getting tired of seeing words
What is going on
I could only live in words before
But now I want to live in life
Now I want to breathe crisp air
And I’m greedy for the trees
I want to go and splash in puddles
Which I’ve done before
But in a different way
Not because it’s something nice to do
But because I want to enjoy the water before it goes back up
It’ll come down again
And my moods will fall too
But I’m here and I’m looking
For anything
Anywhere
Inside my own story
That I don’t have to rely on my own pen
To find.

There is thunder in my heart

I'm sorry you fell in love with fiction

Before you go, spend time with me
Let's create more memories
Before you go, let's make amends
For often our emotions bend
Before you leave, just share yourself
My soul longs for no one else

I wonder how many lives you touched, before mine

How many heartbreaks you caused and how many you tried your best to mend

How many times you closed your eyes and wondered what the future would bring

Not knowing it would include me

I have stopped waiting for you.

I have stopped nurturing the hope that you will someday change your mind.

I've stopped waiting for someday.

Because you've always had today and keep throwing it away.

Autumn-when we met
Winter-when I ran from you
Spring-when you'll forget

I think one day you'll understand
Why I kept my words in
Why I locked up my heart
And threw the key into the ocean
That surrounded me at the time
I couldn't bear to let you drown
In the endless chaos that was mine