I will walk until I feed the soil with my bones
and I will not stop for food or water
as I do not need these things for where I aim to go.

I will not look back at who I leave behind,
at who will age and crumble where they stand
as these statues do not line the halls of where I aim to rest.

The years will pass beneath my feet like dreams within my sleep,
and names will fade from faces and those faces to the distance.
Of all the places they will haunt not one will be my thoughts.

My soul will ware with each desert crossed
leaving pieces of myself at every corner turned
until I walk on bruised and ****** heels leaving crimson prints behind.

The heat will bake my skin, the rain will wash the dust,
and this coat of skin hanging on these bones will fall;
I will be then just my core, only bones outside an empty husk

Bones are brittle and will break, marrow staining resting rocks.
This last effigy will fail, falling forward with momentum
pointing in direction one last time at where I aim to go

I will then be free.

Sitting in the front seat of a rustic truck,
whose paint has seen more thunderstorms
than my skin has years,
you look so still,
like a porcelain doll,
with the fading light of the tired sky
casting its blue blankets over both our eyes.

Through the pitter-patter
as raindrops splatter on the roof,
in time with the erratic static
of the radios endless loops
I can hear you breathing in...
and out...

And as raindrops trickle down the windows
their silhouettes becoming waterfalls;
shadows running down your face
and over your cheeks to your lips...
down your neck,
and under the warm thick folds of the blanket
that hides wordless fingertip games.

The sound of your breath like slow tide
interrupted by a tidal wave;
a thunder clap so loud we shake.
An electric explosion so bright it wakes
the souls of the living that were secretly sleeping,
safe and sound with the darkness deepening.

My arms pull you close
and your arms pull you closer,
pressing your ear to my chest
and my chest to your ear
so tight that it's easy to hear
the my own thunder inside.

Your eyes close,
your heart slows,
and as your pulse settles down
the trees start to dance and sway,
gently, side to side,
through the wind and rain.

Our stories begin to unfold
in sleep and in dreams
as the rain begins to fade.
And through the clouds
a different trickle,
a leak;
a lonely sun beam
warming your cheek.

Sometimes I'll go for walks
long walks
down long roads.

Sometimes I'll have a nap
not a long nap
and just dream.

Sometimes I'll read a book.
a big book
one that takes me weeks.

Sometimes I'll phone a friend
a close friend
one I left behind.

And other times I'll just sit and think
for hours
about you.

Maybe read the Author Note first**

\
I won’t be your Romeo,
in fact I refuse to be.
I’m not what's best for you,
I’m not what's best for me.

//
I refuse to be your princess,
because even I can see
you’re not what's best for you,
you're not what's be for me.

\
You won't end up my Juliette
I don't want you to
I don’t want a perfect girl
You’re just right being you.

//
I don't want a knight in shining armour;
I can wield a sword on my own.
I'm not looking for love,
you're just better than being alone

\
I won’t be your king,

//
I can’t be your queen.

\//
But together...

\                                                    //
You will never be my Romeo.     At least we'll be something.

A cannibal of currency
You’re not yourself anymore.
Became your purse long ago,
Sense of self tied to coins
Of which you’ve never held.

Little man, little man,
where is your home?
The house on this hill
Just an empty shell
Painted like so much canvas.

There for the eyes of your peers
But your peers aren’t your friends
And your friends aren’t around
Tell me please, where did they go?

Little man, little man,
Do you hear the sound?
No one is calling your name
Where did they go
And where are they now
And why aren’t your friends in their homes?
Little man, little man
Do you hear the sound?
They’re making it plain as day.

You ate their income
Ate them of their house and their home.
A cannibal for currency-
Consumed all your friends,
Fat little pig on the hill.

Little man, little man
(You) can no longer ignore the sounds
Of ten thousand mouths
All hungry for you.

You ate their money
But you couldn’t stomach
The pure human spirit inside.
Now they have crawled back,
Out from the ghettos,
Starving and hungry for you.

Forced to eat each other,
You’ve all but raised cannibals,
But this time of flesh and of blood.
Little pig, little pig,
Can you hear the sound,
Or have you become deaf
To your own cries as well?

No one will miss you
You don’t have a home
Your friends became food
A long time ago.

(Die Geld von die Leute Sie Essen gekauft
Sie isst ihr Geld,
Mehr jeden Tag,
Kein Geld fur Essen
Sie isst Sich,
Jagd nach dem Hunger,
Fett kleiner Mann,
Jetzt der Jaeger ist Essen fur jeden Mund
Kleinen Schwein, Kleinen Schwein
Konnen Sie den ton horen?)*

Greasy lip smacks
Sound like ten thousand claps,
The only applause that you’ll ever hear.

I know that heroes often die
but I can not feel their pain

like footsteps in the dark
I can not see a face
but I know you're walking there,
going someplace- I don't know where.

So is it so terribly strange,
to want to be at your side?
Through all of the days and through the nights
Leaving starlit steps behind.
Strange
how it is so hard
When stillness hurts the most


And when all you do is strain
to make the next sunrise

It's when I need you the most
'cause while your embers start to dim,
I see they still cast a holy light,
a warning, a welcome, my beacon in the night.


So is it so terribly strange,
to want to be at your side?
While fighting our way to the sunrise,
leaving scarlet steps behind.
yes it's strange,
how close that we are,
the distance is too far.

---

And I know that heroes often die
And I can not feel their pain

Only the absence of her voice,
and the echo of his cane.

You know, their silence fills the night
And I can not see a flame

So is it so terribly strange
to want to be by your side?

Where do we go when the lights go down
what do we do in the dark
when there's nowhere to go
and nowhere to play
save for monsters in our heads.

don't turn the lights on baby,
don't turn the lights on now,
the nights not over
and i'm not ready
for you to see me
while I'm playing with
monsters in my head.

look away dear
please hear me now
I'm not always like this
not always not like this
please
don't ask me to change
I don't know what i'd
leave behind anyways.

who am I
who am I to you
who are you to know (that)
what you think is true.

I guess I am just what you made me
what you parade me 'round to be
but after dark
when the lights go down
and there's nowhere to go
and there's no one to play
'cept the monsters in my head...

...do I feel at home,
with the
cold
sweats
shivers
fingernails in my neck

the eyes that are watching see me at my best
the voices tell me (that) it's somebody's worst.
-still,
tough love is true love and no one pushes harder,
the monsters are the only ones who push me to be better.

don't turn the lights on baby
don't turn the lights on now,
the night's not over
and i'm not ready
for you to see me
while i'm still working on
just who
I really am.

---

Cause i'm a monster baby
a monster now
turn the lights on if you want to
I'll cast a shadow down

you'd better be ready
for what you're 'bout to see though,
the voice in your head
is only faceless in shadow

(if) you wanna see your fears
then you wanna bring up the sun
and if you want them to be real
just gotta look them in the eyes

oh, turn the lights on baby
please turn the lights on now
the night's not over
and you're not ready
the dawn isn't coming
you'll never be ready

I've been in the dark for so long
do I even have a face?
haven't seen myself since I was someone else
do I even have a face?

turn the lights on baby
turn the lights on please
I've got to know if I am still here
I cannot tell if I am real.

Turn the lights on baby
turn the lights on now
I've got to know if I am still here
I cannot tell if I am real.

Turn the lights on baby
turn the lights on now
turn the lights on baby
turn the lights on.