To the days that matter & to the days that
don’t
May we find laughter in the ever existing
woes

I told mama I can’t do this no more
Ma said she don’t know what to do
Go see someone new
Don’t be so blue

I told dad I can’t do this no more
I wanna die
He said you’re invincible
You can’t die my girl, it’s impossible

But maybe that’s why I feel like death
Let me find peace

The water holds steady
as my tears did
Lush green surrounds me
I could fall asleep now
The water looks like a song...

“....you’ll still be around in the earth, the wind & the stars.”

It’s been years it seems since I last seen your face in person
Now I’ve adored you since I’ve first been around
Your absence is felt & I’ve barely known your presence
How foolish does that sound

Yet the least foolish is your laugh
So gratifying that it would be a shame if anyone were not able to enjoy it or your smile
I feel as though that this thing that’s present is too fragile for me to say aloud
I love your mind,
Your presence.
Your humour.
Your...

Why is it so uncomfortably comfortable
to drown yourself in your emotion
by basking in the sadness of a song
torturing yourself so much by having it on repeat
but you can’t pull yourself together
long enough to change the song
you just wanna cry all the sadness out
but then you do it so you feel numb
so you don’t have to feel

You feel like a lukewarm brush of air on a summers evening
You remind me of a sunflower
in the way they are bold
in the way they outstand everyone else
behind the greyish blue sky; like an ocean in the middle of a light rainstorm.
You smell like a home
light & comforting.
Our memories
faded & subtle.

The feeling between is a mystery
Spoken to n touched too soon
I had hoped it would be a caress on the skin but your embrace is no longer soft
There’s loving intent
No one to impress anymore
But the way we were present
isn’t there anymore
We’re just
& I must be okay with that
Because you’re not here anymore
And that’s that

The lukewarm air is no longer noticeable
Sunflowers no longer impress me
as well as the frigid air
that caresses you after rain fall
Memories fade
& lord knows I’m absentminded when it comes to love
Light & comforting is too comfortable;
that it is uncomfortable solving your mysteries

I’ve come up with so many words of discomfort as to why I should stay but the only one that makes me most uncomfortable now a days is
I love you

On days like these
When the sharp air of the night
Matches the happenings of the day
I feel as though this is what it means to live
To really feel life

The pure joy of the moment with laughs so genuine & innocent
The laughter after a cry because you know it’s going to be okay
The feeling of embracing the unknown & faith
The feeling of heartache & scarcity of love but feeling okay

One of those nights to feel the air & know you’ll see the stars if you look up

I didn’t want to be one of those people
& live in regret with what I’m doing & what I’ve done while I’m doing it.
I realize
But the depth is,
Luring

Tell me this ain’t so
That I know happiness & not only woes
Reaper take me down
Warm me up
& rip out my heart
For its blackened state is no good
in this house

The ripple of the lake looks like a song
Dancing in formation as smooth as my stretch marks

Poem per lover
No fret
Poems of hunger
Drowned in so much thought
It’ll make you melt
Even though the sun is low
We’ll see the day
We’ll see the day that a love is truly felt

First thing on the horizon
Yellow lights twinkle in the distance
Windshield wipers squeak as it wipes
snow from my windshield
Sparks playing lightly in the background
Head heavy
drown in the haze of my tears
Salty lips
Smooth melodies
Light strums
Give me some time

And what is to come of my spirit when
I
dissolve myself of all essence due to lack of
What’s the word
Love?

I wish I could forget about
the scent of coconut pear
But you’re engrained in my thoughts whenever I touch my lips
I wish I could forget about strolls we took on lukewarm days
Standing hip by hip

I wish I could rid you of my mind when I think about what it means to feel
or be in a dip
Or the way you spoke so passionately
Like it were the last thing to escape
from your mouth
I wish I could forget about
the way you drank guineas
like it were smoother than my heart of steel
Or how you couldn’t keep your bun from being wild like the way you always feel

I hate that I think about you every
other day if not every time I fall asleep
I hate that I can’t help but to think
of why sunflowers are my favourite
every time one passes me by
I hate that I didn’t kiss you when I
came to see you & told me I could stay, I just walked away
I hate that I know I’ll never have you
the same
That’s no bad thing

But I hate the most that it took me so long to find this wrenching feeling
because we made love feel folly
We were young
We had reason
I wish we both got to experience us thrive
I’m so proud of myself & lately
I don’t need much reason
I’m so much of the same & so much not
I’d like to meet again, get to know the knew plot

Maybe somewhere in the mountains
If not, we’ll meet again through the stars
I wish I could forget so many things
No words are worth the choking to try express what I miss of you,
so much
I’ll just say goodbye for now
Be content, that’s all.