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Sam Oct 2016
Something that goes through your mind constantly.

Someone who always sneaks up into your thoughts.

A feeling so strong, so powerful.

Something that will never be forgotten.
Love or Hate?
You choose.
For me? it changes, and doesnt stop
Sam Jan 2017
Sparkling through the body
Stretched across the face

shaking from fear
whirling with confusion

nags at the heart
resumes it's former place
These emotions probably happened in a span of 1 minute
I guess I just have to take any happiness I can get
but the sadness that overcomes afterwards hurts more than before wasn't for me.
Sam Dec 2016
Sat there, thinking about anything.
Feel the sudden surge of saddness,
and try to cry, but realize your body is too weak?
Sam Feb 2017
Sharp cool air blows through the brown wave
Air is taken in deeply,
Cold is felt all around,
but she is not cold.

The lights pierce the blue pools that fall one by one
Single sound of a breath,
The birds and bugs have silenced,
but her mind is not quiet.

Beautious ***** of fire stretch above the shingles
Miles above stretched forever
Wishing all the lights to go out
but she just stares
Sam Dec 2016
Not talked to someone all day,
then the moment you see their face
or hear their voice,
your heart feels warmer
and your day gets brighter,
One uncontrollable smile at a time?
Sam Dec 2016
Emotional me, cannot bare,
that you, my friend, are not in my care.
I pray and wish that you may be,
Though apparently my lock, does not fit your key.
Yes, our lives are separate, ever so far apart,
But don't worry, my dear, you'll always be in my heart.
Wherever I go, Whatever I see,
I shall always be looking and thinking of thee.
I will never find you, because you are so far.
If you ever get lost, just follow the north star.
I'll be there waiting for you, as cheerful as can be,
And we will lay there smiling, knowing you are finally with me.
Okay reading over this, it sounds like a love poem.
It actually is meant for a long distance friend.
I was watching reuniting videos online today, and it just reminded me of when I visited her over the summer. God, do I miss her so much. 320 miles is a long ways away, I just wish I could hug her sometimes. I know she needs it, and so do I. We are literally two peas in a pod, I can even begin to tell you everything we have in common. I just miss and love her so much. I know she won't be reading this, and I know it is kind of weird to be saying all of this, but it's 11:25 p.m. and I still have most of my homework to do.  So, this is a better use of my time.  That chick has listened to me complain and need advice over the same things over, and over, and over again. I'm surprised she hasn't just blocked me out of her life, it is probably very annoying. Anyways, I had a point to all of my blabber, I think?
Hold onto something special, hold onto that friendship.
She left me 2 years ago, and hell I still tell that girl everything.
Meeting someone new, always having the old, something to always treasure.
Always tell them how much you love them, and how much they mean to you. You never know when, well I won't get into that, just always tell them they are worth something, and, if possible, never let go <3
Sam Jan 2017
Felt the desire to hug someone,
and send your love so far,
but know deep down
*you may never get the chance to?
•A little inspiration for the Daffodil•

I know-going against my goal a litle bit
(with posting quick things)
but some little things are worth it ^-^
Sam Nov 2016
Sixteenth Note.
Hard to keep up with, Hard to understand.
Can be played only by some, those with experience.

Whole Note.*
Keeps everything together, all in one.
Everyone can play, but doesn't take away from it's worth.
Sam Feb 2017
felt terrified of what was,
scared of what could be,
and petrified in the moment?
Sam Mar 2017
had someone walk in
and you just freeze
because their stunning beauty
took your breath away...
Sam Nov 2016
I wake up.
Tear stained pillow,
Blankets thrown everywhere.

I have to get up.
It takes so much energy,
to push my body onto the paper covered floor.

I don't want to get up.
Wrapping myself in what's left of the blankets,
wincing at the pain felt as my body moves.

I lay there.
Mind whirls already of things that must be accomplished.
Can't I have just a moment of peace?

I get up.
My body aches as I step over the forgotten homework and ***** laundry,
Dizzyness and Lightheadedness cause me to stumble my way to my closet.

I walk.
Putting on clothes to cover the night before,
and starring at the unrecognizable figure before me in the mirror.

I get ready.
Making food that I'm never hungry for anyways,
and forcing my eyes to stay open.

I leave.
To go to a place I am scared to be in,
but sometimes is better than the place I left.
I apologize, this is really bad
Ill fix it up later.
Sam Oct 2016
I know now I have the ability,
I was scared for so long that I was broken.
But turns out, I wasn't.
Because water doesn't flow from the vase,
unless a crack has been put in it.
Sam Oct 2016
To me, you know, you can't deny,
for I can see the suffering in your eye.

This is more than a battle between me and one,
because now I see, who is holding the gun.

Put down the rifle, take out the mag,
for these bullet's are not yours to drag.

I paid for the mystery box, plain and simple,
It is my turn to take out the rocket launcher missile.

I tell you now about Juggernog and Quick-Revive,
because they aren't enough to keep us alive.

I've got you're back, and you've got mine,
as we battle through the challenge of the canine.

Board up the windows, blocking us in,
as we wait for the next level to finally begin.

We are together through this, one and all,
yet you won't always be there when I fall.

Let me take the ray gun in my hands,
as we travel together through the badlands.

I want to hear and feel the thrill,
as the voice around me whispers *Insta ****
This is entirely based off of a video game...
Sam Sep 2016
All the answers desired,
no answers given.

Questions wanted to be asked,
No courage to ask them.

Forever wondering,
Forever waiting,
In curiosity.
Sam Nov 2016
Fists clenched so hard,
Nails piercing the skin.
Memories flow, like an endless river.
I am not alone

Searching for the answers,
Tearing through the fantasy,
Digging through the graves of the past.
I feel so alone

Pushed against the wall,
Forcing away my breath,
Feeding the fire kindling in my heart.
I can't be alone

Eyes darting back and forth,
Wondering what wall will tumble down,
Scared that my every move will cause pain.
*But I am alone
Sam Oct 2016
I have friends who love me,
A family who cares for me,
even a dog who greets me at the door.
Why do I feel as if nobody is there?
Why do I feel enclosed in a box?
Why can't I ever break free?
I am not alone, I am never alone.
Then why do I always feel it?
Sam Sep 2016
Have I turned it around?
Am I doing it, too?
I'm afraid.
I don't want that.
I can't do that.
I can't lose them.
I need help.
Sam Oct 2016
I read the book,
I wrote the notes and I interpreted.
I came in to school,
and the teacher told me wrong.
I my interpretation was totally off,
even though I had resonable proof for my assumptions.
I just don't see, what others see,
Ya know?
Sam Sep 2016
I hear your crys.
I am here for you.
We all are.
A community of strength, love, and happiness
Though happiness seems to be lacked
We all join together
Parade our Pride
It doesn’t stop the hate
The wounded
The innocent victims
The Death
Facing Inequality and injustice
Standing up is the only way to stop it

For whom you ask?
The Fallen Angels.
I love this because it quite honestly looks like an angel.
(In between the story, I will add poems like this)
Sam Nov 2016
"You are so innocent"
"You are so cute when you are angry"
"Oh, shh, you could never hurt anyone"
"You are too nice to do anything bad"
"Awh, look at you trying to be tough"
"Violence and you aren't even remotely related"
"You? Jealous?? But you're life is perfect!!! What more could you ask for???"

oh honey...
You haven't seen anything yet
I hide a side of me, no one is wants to see
Make me jealous, one more time, I dare ya
Hurt my friends, one more time,I dare ya
Break my family, like you've tried, I dare ya
Just if you do, watch your back
Sweet Revenge will be waiting around the corner

Just little things make me ****** lately.
I know, this isn't good-> I'm afraid I may Ill lash out at the wrong moment. Anger can only be held in for so long....
Sam Sep 2016
Food is good, They say.
Sleep is good, They say.
People are good, They say.
Funny how only one is true,
But even then, sometimes it's zero.
of what you ask?
Sam Jan 2017
525,600 minutes.
Minutes in a year.

How many of those minutes, will you be happy
How many of those minutes, will you feel on top of the world
How many of those minutes, will you want to relive?

Really Think.
How can you make your minutes happy?
How can you make the best out of your 525,600 minutes?

It can simply just be, to find happiness in the smallest things
therefore no matter where you are,
no matter what happens
There is always ONE thing, that you can turn to
That you can feel happy for-
Whether a person, place or thing.
pet, note, or song.
Doesn't matter.
As long as you know:
You have the ability to be Happy <3

Now go make those 525,600 minutes,
the happiest you've ever had.
Sam Oct 2016
for nobody knows the true reasons,
some things just happen.
i cannot choose my emotions,
for they are chosen for me.
i am incapable of the hate being spoken of,
i will never be capable.

for doing things to me does not cause hate,
it causes disappointment.
i will only hate, if something was done to those i love.

lessons will be taken from this,
i do not have to be the one enforcing it.
because you are hating yourself,
more than i deserved to hate you.
you are punishing yourself,
more than anyone ever would.

so now stop this hate,
stop desiring the hurt.
because i will never give you the hate you want.

give up on trying, because it will never work,
you can try to convince me of the hurt.
i will not take it, i will not budge.
i stick to my guns

*i do not and will not ever hate you
Sam Sep 2016
I'm sorry.
I wish I hadn't,
because then I wouldn't be this deep.
I'm sorry.
I wish I had,
because then I could see clearer.
I'm sorry.
I wish in general,
because it only leads to confusion.
I'm sorry.
I wished for you,
because it only lead to heartbreak.
I'm sorry.
I let go,
because I now am lost.
I'm sorry.*
I'm sorry.
After realizing I cant change this back to private, please ignore my lil dramatic self.
Sam Sep 2016
Thank you.
I needed to hear that.

For you patched the hole in the wall,
instead of hanging a poster to cover it.

Moving on will be tough,
but I'm lucky to have you as a friend by my side.
Sam Sep 2016
Is this how it feels?
Is this what a true friendship is?
To have trust,
To be able to tell everything.
Never worrying about how they will respond.
But wait, time goes by
Now you worry about the responses.
You worry how you look.
How you act.
You try to be funny, likeable
You like what they like,
Feel what they feel.
This is more than a friendship,
This is a stronger feeling,
Relationship wanted
Relationship denied?
I don’t know
I never tried.
June 20, 2016
Sam Nov 2016
I hate stepping on hot coals.
I try to avoid them,
but it takes a lot of energy and persistence.
I thought eventually a callus would form,
that way my feet would be numbed from the burn.
Turns out, that's not how the body works.
When again can I walk down a sidewalk,
instead of the burning path to hell?  

*the serpent slithers away into the darkness,
knowledge gained, and is ready to fire
Sam Jan 2017
Sometimes, and sometimes not,
Feeling one thing, but not the other.

Feeling so, gives joy for others,
joy for ourselves.
When we aren't, it tends to overshadow.
Cloud our judgement as to why,
and persistent to figure out how.

Overthinking, Over exaggerating
Thinking of what should've been done,
what could've been done

True growth is shown
through making a better effort
for the hours to come

Its nice to feel so,
but it won't always happen
Remember why it doesn't
Sam Oct 2016
Going through the motions,
Without looking back.


Take a moment.

Reread your past,
Relive those fleeting moments that won't return.
Revive you.

Step back into your moments of hate,
of love,
of happiness.

Feel yourself take the time machine back
into times of crises,
times of confusion.

Look at who you have become,
the tragedies you have faced,
and the strength given.
the joy you have experienced,
and the memories to remember.
the love you have shown,
and the endless amount yet to come.

Your life is precious
Take time out of your busy day,
and check your archive.

Reflect, Remember, *Reread
Sam Dec 2016
I plan.
plan out all the **** I want to say to you.

I tell myself, Next time.
Next time say it.

Every time, I don't.
I don't say what I want to say.

*I am a failure
I was looking through my private and unlisted poetry today. Sometimes the things you keep hidden from everyone else, you keep hidden from yourself.
I learned a little bit about the past me today.
Its funny what you find, what you wanted to shelter.
Needless to say, this is an old poem, one of my private.
Sam Oct 2016
My head travels.
Was taken out of one,
and put in another.

No matter where I travel,
it will follow.

The constant dizziness,
The constant spinning,
The constant cycle.
To talk is to analyze
To analyze is to speculate
To speculate is to hurt
To hurt is to...
Sam Oct 2016
It starts with one,
Expands into many.
You only see a few.
These were the beginning.
There are many more hidden,
Never to be shown.
They still hurt, maybe even more.
Continuing to grow
Until there is no room left.
June 20, 2016
Sam Oct 2016
I am being pulled back,
Well, I am already back.
I was improving,
Then stuff happened,
and I'm back where I started.
Why did I let go
How did I let go
I try to make up metaphors but they never work so I apologize for my blantely obvious poems that **** anyways :).
Sam Oct 2016
It will always hurt,
the pain will never go away.

Knowing what is known now,
Knowing the hope given for the future,
replaces some of the hurt, with hope.

Memories are never to be forgotten,
yet the past is the past.

Dwelling on what can't be changed,
hinders the continuation of life.

Picking up the baggage will take some time.
Moving on all together will still be the hardest thing to accomplish.

But when the final bag is put on the truck,
and all that has to be done is to drive away,
I will smile, reach over to the dial, and turn on the car radio.

As I pull out of the driveway, the radio will be at its highest,
because looking back, I'll be able to say,
That the music had never faded away.
Thank you for a sense of peace and hope for the future.
Never forget that I, as well as Mom, is always here.
The friendship may have died,
but the sisterhood lives on forever,
even if spoken words are never shared between.
Sam Dec 2016
We call the outcasts, to stitch these wounds together in our beautiful remains.
Children surrender knives and pens,
they give up their perfect weapon.
The mortitians daughter, carolyn, brings up all your hate.
Fire rages in irony as it is heaven's calling.
No matter how tough times may be, never give in, never back down.
This is our sweet blasphemy.
We Stitch these Wounds Song titles-Black Veil Brides
Yes there is still a meaning  behind it
Sam Oct 2016
The very last person on your mind before you fall asleep is either the reason for your happiness or your pain

It's a funny thing to think,
Pain and Happiness
In such a close parameter.

It is so hard to tell,
who is which.
It makes me question, everything.

How many days was it actually pain?
How many times was I hurting myself more?
Where is the happiness I was wishing for?

Happy thoughts travel through my mind as the moon rises.
The stars illuminate across the sky,
just as the perceived happiness is in my mind.

Could my happiness be entangled in the pain?
Are the strings of my emotions being weaved,
to the point of not knowing?

The power of knowledge.
Knowledge is power.

The happiness of pain.
Pain is happiness?
A silly game played can turn into a mess of thoughts
Sam Jan 2017
It's okay, not to be okay

Learning this phrase, not to long ago,
has given me a false sense of reality.

It is? Oh, Is this what this feeling is?

Never noticed, never classified,
moved on, and pushed aside.

I guess I'm not okay*

Now I know, and Now I can say
Rather than pushing my thoughts away.
Sam Dec 2016
Shoved to the ground,
Elbow to the arm,
Ball to the face.
Visable bruises form, sore to the touch.

Screaming through the wall,
Ignorance of the people,
Suffication of the culprit.
Mental bruises form, sore to the mind.
Sam Nov 2016
Don't. you. dare.

Rage builds up again,
Fury spills over,
A burning passion smothers all else.

Hypocrisy discovered,
Attitude noted.

I don't think you realize what you're doing.

Adding kindling to the fire,
sending an explosion through the blaze,
letting the flames roar more than before.

Going into harms way,
Walking into the inferno

This is you're *
and only warning

*Back. Off.
Actions are never forgotten.
Sam Sep 2016
Sitting on the shelf,
collecting dust.
Used as decorations,
rather than their actual purpose.
To be read is what they desire,
yet that is something they shall never acquire.
So they sit, as life goes by,
being forced to comply.
Their wish may not be granted,
and it is the wish of others they follow.
If their's isn't, someone else's should be right?
So, as decorations they sit,
hoping someday, their wish will be granted,
and they will benefit, once more.
Sam Sep 2016
A piece of jewelry hung on the wall,
Always stared at, never worn.
Some may take it down, try it on,
but it is always put back.
Its never gone to a fancy dinner,
Its never seen the light of day.
All the other bracelets are being worn,
but why not this one?
This one is broken,
This one is old.
Nobody wants it,
Nobody has the patience to fix it.
So it just sits there, collecting dust.
Waiting for the day, that it can finally be worn.
Sam Dec 2016
Can't this just, stop?
I laugh now because there is nothing else to do.

There is a saying that goes
Every decision you have made, leads you to this moment

People stretch this to be more magical than it really is.
But if you really think about it,

That morning I was deciding to have a pop-****, or no breakfast.
I chose pop-****.
What if I ate no breakfast-where would I be today?

It's a silly concept, and a lot of people won't truly get what I'm saying
but what ifs always get me

What if I didn't go...
What if I didn't want...
What if I didn't hear...

Caught up in the what if's instead of the what can's
Sam Jan 2017
Dare tell me not,
those things
on your tongue

of what you want
me to hear.

Never shall those
words, part
from your lips

i swear
i'm making this clear.

It is not to be
said, it is
not to be done

for this
is something i fear.

Never shall you
speak, of them
in that tone

if i am
the one who is near.
Sam Mar 2017
Castiel, dear Castiel
be careful in your brave fight.
Your wings, their tampered,
battered and broken.
You fly ever so slightly
above the earth unspoken
Your heart has diminished.
Been tampered with and
beaten over.
Yet you still give the love
the love they once gave.
You pursue and persist,
never giving up on the fight.
I believe in you dear Cas,
I am here by your side.
Never shall I let you go,
without a trusted guide.
I whisper to you
what you already know
The strength you behold
is greater than most.
Just don't use it all up,
on one tiny ghost.
TRUST ME, I know what I'm talking about
Sam Oct 2016
What is in my head, is my buisness.
Unless I tell you, then its our buisness,
but not the buisness of those around us.
Same goes for you.
What you don't tell me, I don't need to know.
What you do tell me, Is your buisness alone.
Not hers, his, or theirs.
Your secrets are safe with me.
I've learned my lesson before.
Telling nobody, is better than telling all,
because it saves confusion in the end.
Sam Dec 2016
Around and around the bees fly,
above the colorful flowers.
You'll never know when they'll try,
To gain what's rightfully ours.
Sam Dec 2016
Violet and Red no longer grow,
only dark shades of green seem to replace.
The gardener can come, and dig with a ***,
But the deep rich colors, can no longer glow.
Sam Oct 2016
I can't take back what I said.
I can't travel back in time to reverse the outcome.
I can't magically make everything perfect.

I can sit here, and wait.
I can get up, and move on.
I can switch back and forth, never finalizing a decision.

I can't choose,
I can't know what the future holds,
I can't forget.

I can keep asking,
I can keep clarifying.
I can stay.

Can't I?
I don't know, I just, I need, I want, I can't, I-I just don't know.
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