Unlucky,
considered by many.

Cursed,
as many said.

Considered as bad luck,
like a black cat.

The thirteenth,
it is feared.

Only a handful can see
the divinity underneath..

such as hers;
her eyes differs
in what it sees

I think it can see rainbows
in a monochrome facade,
an angel
from a fallen devil,
a poet
in a psychotic patient,
the positive
in a double negative,
a person deserving of love,
although it hated its own blood.

It's a complete wonder; a mystery.

But as the Italians say,
"fare tredici":
hit the jackpot
with the numero trece,

More than what she can see—
that is what she is to me.

Has it only been 41 months?
I feel like it’s been long, like a lot
Lots have been said and done
Trying, fun times and some

I still remember how I fell for you
I shouldn’t back then; but I had no choice but to

As cliché as it may sound, it was all slow motion
You laughed at something I said, and everything became background noise
I wished to always make you laugh, from then on
Your smile became my priority, first and foremost

It was a love I have never thought will come realized
I thought of giving up; even stepped back
But you turned around and took my hands
Walked with me and never let me out of your grasp

It is fun to reminisce these
We have come a long way, truly
To more I love yous, shall we?

2052, 2069 or 2075?
A bottle of Coke everyday
Much earlier perhaps

An accident?
Due to old age?
For sure it'll come so sudden

Ah, I should prepare a list
Of accounts and passwords
For my sister to access

She will have to put a year after '1992 - ',
Update my status to 'deceased'
And respond to the grieving comments too

Brace yourselves for the loving messages
And stories of how amazing I was
That will sure flood from my funeral's guests

They will range from people I hold dear
To people I barely know
And from those who doesn't really care

It will be fun to watch from the sidelines
And a little sad too
To see them desperately hold on to what's gone

I guess that's the joke of life
You'll know its importance once its out of your hands
I guess I'll have fun, while I'm alive

Oh the irony!
I am celebrating my birth
By writing a poem about my death

Smell nothing
from scents

Taste nothing
from sweetness

Go deaf
in the silence

Go blind
in the light

Go numb
in a touch

Only sense by
your third eye

I wonder if shellfish are selfish
Or if the rain is already tired of falling

I wonder if the ocean is tired of being blue
Or if Mr. Cactus wants a hug too

I wonder if snows ever felt warm
Or if the words "It's cold!" ever came out from Mr. Sun

And finally, I wonder if God also prays

The manager who seems obliging guides us by saying ‘this way’,
Turning on the light on the long hallway, she says ‘Red to the right’,
The destroyed revolving door; bird of paradise flowers on the floor,
Tarantulas crawling on the satin walls, I turned back and laughed

Where’re you going baby?
I wait on this chair; don’t open your eyes until I count to seven

Pret un, the dewdrops of night on your neck; to the extent that you lost your voice,
Deux, a castle made of blocks that ***** together, to between your fingers,
Trois, the spider web which entangles and entangles like this, continuously,
The sandclock which started to go backwards to 9095

The noise that echoes throughout the long hallway, ‘Have we met before?’,
‘The blue to the left of the red’,
The rusted angel’s wings; yesterday’s dream that has been deferred,
Concealing your eyes from the direction of the claps

Who are you? Tell me baby,
That’s when you put your hand into a mirror that reflects nobody

Et quatre, the scent of nostalgia even on your back, your hot breath,
Cinq, the eyes which rise even in the darkness; if it’s not permitted,
Six, if your tears are reviving, then somehow,
The remains which slowly come to live in 9095

Don’t try to find anything more than this for I’ll be by your side,
Even though you can’t go back once you have opened your eyes,
If you still like it then, silently,

Pret un, the dewdrops of night on your neck; to the extent that you lost your voice,
Deux, a castle made of blocks that ***** together, to between your fingers,
Trois, the spider web which entangles and entangles like this, continuously,
The sandclock which started to go backwards to 9095

Et quatre, the scent of nostalgia even on your back,
Cinq, the eyes which rise even in the darkness,
Six, if your tears are reviving, then somehow,
The remains which slowly come to live in 9095

I have seen colorful rainbows
And breath-taking sunsets
But I can't get enough of both
I can't get enough of nature

I would like to witness
Fireflies flying through the darkness
With their lights dancing around like in parties
Seeing it would really be great!

I'd love a show
Of falling white snow
Its cold touch on my skin
All I can do is to imagine!

But my biggest dream is
To see an Aurora Borealis
I'll permit even death
After I see this beauty

I grew up in a tropical city, you see
So nature became a mystery to me
They're like fairies asking for a chase
An exotic flavor I'd love to taste

But if the Shinigami comes to me first
Before I can check these off my wishlist
And if I can't bargain anymore
I'll calmly come with him and say, "Sure.."

"I have already enjoyed Aurora Borealis
In my lover's eyes long before
And I had several fireflies in my stomach,
Plus I have fallen for someone like a snow."

So no regrets
I'll check you all out in my next life
I'll leave to the living the rest
To take care of these wonders for the reincarnated

I'll get out of my shell
And I'll spoil you a little
Because for you I fell

I'll take you to dinner
At the tower of Eiffel
Give you everything that shines, everything that is fragile
Hang on your ceiling the most extravagant chandelier
Fly you inside a balloon fueled with hot air
Buy a yacht and set sail
Start our love story to beat any existing fairytale

I'll buy us rings and send invitations to every mails
You and I will walk the majestic aisle
I'll lean for a kiss after lifting your veil
And in celebration, they'll ring the church's bells
But first, say you do, please do tell
And wear this round-shaped silver around your finger

But if all I wrote fails
I'll just love you a little
More everyday

Allow me to stutter
B-Because this is something i really can't admit
ExEmption—that is what you are to me
GanGin' up on me like little squirrels
AsphAlt-dragging cuddly bear
InducIng pain and ecstasy
Lalala-Lullaby of nightmare and desire no one should see

It really is something
N-Nah, you really are something
InItially something from my peripheral vision
E-elEvated like a server administrator
GoonG! a golden mic when you didn't auditioned
"OooooOoooh~" cried the wolf in a human form

Let me be your darkness,
so you can shine your brightest.
Let me be your devil,
for your angels to ****.
Let me be your villain,
for you - the protagonist to reign.
Let me be your nightmare,
to hear your sigh of relief once awake.

Let me be the stain,
you cannot wash away.
Let me be your curse,
that you cannot run away from no matter what course.
Let me be the memories,
you want to erase.
Let me be your past,
that will continue to haunt you as time passes.
Let me be your sin,
that you desperately confess again and again.


Let me be these..
for me to be a part of your life, at least..
Oh let me be..
*So you can never be whole, without me.

Love, you see
Is very easy
Easy as 1, 2, 3
As A, B, C

I give my heart to you
You give me yours
Ooops! Don't break it!
For I'll also drop yours

I point a gun into your chest
And you're free to do the same
Because in us, we trust
That our fingers that can pull the trigger, is too numb

I give my all to you
You give your all to me
I'll promise forever to you
Will you promise forever to me too?

Love is easy, it should be
It's just a matter of give and take
A symbiotic interaction called mutualism
A law called equivalent exchange

But love isn't easy
Emotions, situations, make it so hard
If only it was easy
Poetry won't exist even now

If love was as easy as a barter system
I'll offer you my all, you can take them
And I'll succumb to all that you've given
But love isn't easy at all, love just isn't

Oh my darling,
your beauty comes in many shapes.

You are the Sunset;
you are the beauty before the darkness.

You are the Moon;
you are the beauty in the darkness.

You are the Sunrise;
you are the beauty before the mourning.

You are the Rainbow;
you are the beauty after the rain.

A mortal and a maiden
Loved each other
So much that they didn't thought back then
That they'll end

A god betrothed the maiden
Leaving the mortal broken
But after loving himself
He should fight, he realizes

But the only way to fight a god
Is for the mortal to become a Beelzebub
And because he knows their love is mutual
He became the devil; sacrificing it all

The mortal waged war with god
Fights with the maiden on his mind
Fights with all his might
Fights a losing fight

And as the god's final blow struck
As the mortal's body drops
His evilness slowly leaves out
Along with his life

The maiden runs up to him
As they heard the god laughing
"It wasn't a fight that he could've won.
But yours, the maiden's decision."

The mortal heard the maiden weeping
Reached for her hand, with all his strength left
"Even if it was just for the love exhaled from your exhausted breath,
fighting a losing fight was worth it."

Someday I'll let go of you like a kite
But I'll hold on to the string

Let lightnings strike
Discover my grip tightening

A love that can easily be mine
It's already in my hand
All I had to do was to grasp
But it was left undone

A love that came back
It still won't come true but
It was still in my hand
And I was taken aback

Being the weakling that I am,
My heart wavered and I was shaken
To the past, I felt regret
To the present, I felt guilt

And now I'm stuck
Which way? Left or right?
And since I can't decide
I am dropping them all, leaving nothing behind

Go! Go all away!
Leave me be for this is where I'll stay
In the middle of nowhere is my imprisonment
To the future, I feel nothing

Love? I won't ever fvcking wish for it
Just let those love I've let go to find it instead
Let them find peace, and maybe someday forgiveness
At my sanity's expense

Three buildings
No, I didn't miss these
The curved road
The way to prison

Sheep at the entrance
A wolf inside
It passes through them in a blink of an eye
Its acting is oh so fine

An innocent angel glides
Staircase marked with the devil's hands
A seemingly dried paint
Staining who dares to touch it

Avoiding gazes
You couldn't see me
A power of an introvert
That is to never get noticed

With a preserved key
Into an unchanging door ****
What is security?
Heh, you've let your guard down

This place is rotting
To the extent that it sent shivers on my spine
Garments still hanging
Even something that was mine

"Sshh!" Quiet baby!
Hush! Don't be too surprised
I am so glad to see
Your narrowed yet rounded eyes

The wooden chair creaks
The once soft sofa is now stiff
Now, now, don't sniff
It should be me, with all these detergent scent

Little cockroaches running around
Hiding, popping in and out of the cracks
With what you said I felt glee
You want to be like them, free

Why just now?
You could've done it before in rewind
How does it taste?
The pain from twenty-o-one-five

Beauty-less vanity
With that can you foresee?
I just unmasked your true colors
Uglier than any other monsters

Ooops, I cut too much
Of what he considered as his "life"
Now, what?
You will never ever be satisfied

He never knew me anyway
How did you like my introduction?
He can't even take sufferings like my way
He turned the switch on

Alas! It didn't work
Of course it won't
Behold! Humanity at its finest
Do you see the laughing saints?

We have now reversed our roles
True, it is quite forcing
You've made me like this for so long
Is it to your liking?

Red, violet, black, blue
The color of the rainbow signifies me
I'll paint these colors to you
See the root of my tree

With your voice
That's already hoarsed
To me it is pleasure
Your nails have to endure

You're holy? No!
Neither I am
Your tea has gone cold
As I dream with eyes wide open

Going home
What is remorse,
When it was what you deserved?
Alarms go off

Beware of them
As a lover or a friend
As a family or a foe
As a passerby or a neighbor

Because they hide as they stand on the stage
They put you on a mind-boggling maze
They set you on an endless chase
With no one else but with your own tail

Because they shout in silence
They scream using pen
Using only pseudonyms
They want you to both understand and not understand what they mean

Because they conceal as they express
Behind figure of speeches
They'll have you take a guess
When you do, you're already checkmate in chess

Beware of them
Because they are contrasting beings
Living in a world of what-ifs
Living between reality and dreams

Dreams for family, rage for a foe
Feelings for lovers, concern for a friend
Observation in a passerby, rumors from a neighbor
They turn it into words, rhyming at the end

Because they are but they are not
Because they do but they don't
Because they are cowards but they have guts
Because they will but they won't

Because they are two-faced people
Because they are at different places at the same time
Because they push and they pull
Because they have truths and they have lies

Oh beware of them
Because they're simply complicated
Because they're famous yet anonymous
Because they'll always have you choose

What I am to you
Is an ant in a bird's-eye view

Stalking..
Lone wolf
Walking..
Without any particular destination

Gotta do what you want on your day
Wanna see? Why then stay?
Gotta learn to enjoy yourself's company
You yourself is your best buddy!