As insecure toddlers, we were often told by our parents that inner beauty is more important than outer beauty. This is how they were able to instill in us the confidence we may have today, whenever we represent ourselves in front of other people. However, this is something I find to be quite inaccurate.  If you ask a random person about what they find beautiful and attractive, most of them would probably begin to describe a person’s physical attributes than the internal attributes.

Beauty is defined to be the perfect balance and harmony with nature, which may lead to feelings of attraction and emotional well-being. Since the attraction is subjective, the term “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” takes place. Many individuals would like to believe that looks are never important, and that judgments should be based on a person’s internal well-being instead of its outer counterparts.

In our modern society, external beauty is more favorable since everything becomes more convenient, than when you only have internal beauty. People will always see your external beauty the moment they see you and not that beautiful mind and soul of yours, and that’s what makes them attracted to you. Just like with expensive cars, the moment a car is put into the market, the consumer who will buy them would first look at their exterior first before they would look for its driving ability; no matter how good its performance may be, these people would always look at its exterior. Also, external beauty can help you be successful, it can land you jobs, earn more money, and help you be treated with more respect by strangers than those with internal beauty.

The preference for external beauty than internal beauty is what is wrong in our current society. We live up to the evolved norms of society that we have started to grow backwards. Outer beauty fades, and no matter how beautiful you are on the outside, once people get to know you, you’d be nothing but a simple less attractive human being than you once were. I would leave a wonderful quote here written by a great author: “A tree may look as beautiful as ever; but when you notice the insects infesting it, and the tips of the branches that are brown from disease, even the trunk seems to lose some of its magnificence.”

Adversity is one of the things we can’t escape in our lives; it is also one of the biggest hurdles that we must overcome for us to become better individuals. However, is this meant to be a negative, cynical assessment of what we must look forward to? The answer to this question is no. There are several effects that adversity can bring to our overall being, it can be either positive or negative depending on how you evaluate them in your perspective.

One of the best things about adversity is that it’s a forceful being that tears us away from our comfort zones. It is like a strong wind that brings us to the places that we want to go but with hesitance to do so, it also removes the things we have grown fond of but are holding us back from what we should be, leaving us to be in the best shape that we can ever become instead of just imagining it from afar.

Despite the best thing that we can get from adversity, it can also ******* us if we become too stuck in an unfavorable mindset wherein fear and pain comes to play. We think so much of the unknown that we forget that we have to move on, until when we do so, so much time has been wasted.

Adversity is like drowning in a river of neutrality; we drift to the currents of the same common thread and forget every bit of unique trait we have upon us, and while we face life like lost ravens drifting through the darkness, searching for traces of non-diminished skies, we find meaning in our lives as we find that small patch of white light at the end of every misery we have conquered.

Life is a continuous matter of common observation. It enables us to realize, that each one of us, is a vivid and complex mortal living an epic story. One that carries on and on invisibly around you, like an anthill sprawling deep underground with several elaborate passageways to thousands of lives that you won’t have the chance to know.

As time passes us by, we can’t help the rushing flow of frightening responsibilities coming through our way. As a result, we tend to focus more on these perennially problematic things, instead of looking at the bigger picture, which hinders us from exploring the beautifully intricate world we live in. However, as human beings, even if we choose to neglect these duties and just start enjoying the moments we have to explore this diverse environment, we’d always be afraid of what’s going to happen next, or the consequences of our actions to the unknown future. It can’t be helped, as we are all fear mongering creatures, crippled by uncertainties that may never happen and not even affect us at all.    

Despite our poor condition as temporary mortals in this world, we must always keep in mind that we exist in this universe to see our world unfold on its own beyond our imagination. To be risky enough to find our own adventure to keep us sane from the struggles we face in life, to see beyond barriers that others find to be a simple dead end, to draw things you love close to empower you to do the best of what you can with your abilities, and to find your true purpose in this life to be able to feel alive with zeal and vigor. That, to me, that is the true meaning and quintessence of life.

Another day, another passing hour
Dwelling under uncertainties that linger
From a bad decision that turned everything sour
Until time was even cursed just to turn seconds over

How simple it is for us to fall for someone
Yet continuously die of agony trying to move on
We spend so much time in nonchalant effervescence along a loved one
And weep once they've decided in our lives to be gone

Abandoned without any explanation
Continuously questioning, "Where have I gone wrong?"
Whilst shattered and confused under cruciation
We forget to seek simple answers from crevices in our heart's song

Indeed words are never enough to explain our emotions
Leaving us hollow and empty but filled with something powerful
A thing that can never be explained or envisioned
It leaves us chasing for it like a desire that is sinful

I'm running from a man
Who will catch me wherever I am.
I can hide from him but in nowhere.
And in nowhere, I am.

I have begged him dearly
To correct my wrongs.
Yet with a melancholic smile,
He can only say no.

I've loathed him then.
Calling him a foe like no other,
Cruel and unfeeling as a murderer.
But he was still the same man I knew.

As I've passed through dawns and dusks,
I finally realized that he's nothing but my dear.

For so long, I thought of him as a criminal.
Lingering around until a tick starts to fade
And snatches it away before anyone grieves.
Yet never has it been.

He's willing to fix the wrongs,
But from listening to lessons of the past.
Forgiving what was once broken
And forever shall future be mended

He gives before he can take,
In silence he bears mockery,
While he keeps composure and clockwork fine.

I salute and endear you my friend,
Forgive my cruelty for wasting my moments badly
Yet, I regret nothing but I am grateful
Thank you for my time, Time.

Hello. How have you been?
It's been a while since we've talked
Do you still remember me?
Maybe not. But can you spare me some of your time?

I want to keep it short, and so do you.
Time passed by so fast and I've forgotten what made us fall apart.
Maybe you still remember, but I don't.
Please forgive me for forgetting so quickly.

I can only assume what has taken place,
But I can never be fully right

Time might be a factor,
Leaving us busy with all our endeavors,
Meeting new people along the way,
And forgetting me and others that have been pages in your previous chapters.

Or maybe a feud,
Tearing us apart with bitter hearts,
Poisonous tongues matched with sharp words.
Killing us whole and erasing every cherished memory.

Whatever the cause of our unfortunate falling apart,
Leaving us to just be a page in  certain chapters of your life,
I hope we're worth remembering.

I'm sorry to  consume some of your time, But I shall leave you now in peace,
Knowing that my unsent letters and messages have been finally delivered personally.

Was there a beginning of something?
Or just hints of plausible fragmented chaotic ends?
Maybe they were there like pieces of cracked nothings,
But perhaps not - like endless cosmic scends.  

As your red lips curved near the crinkles of your cheeks,
Everything came to a dull gray blur.
My heart did beat as if you're the one it seeks,
And I couldn't help but feel weak with sudden anxiety and amour.

You've produced a crevice inside a forgotten vessel,
Leaving fear instead of the usual nonchalance.
Dreaming that I rest in your unearthly cradle,
Where I'll lay beneath death and living without constant balance.

"Be careful", my dearest conscience once said.
Curiously, I asked her why.
But she only looked at me with those soft eyes,
And smiled kindly.

I was angered and impulsively roamed the path of danger.
I knew she was worried sick,
Yet I didn't care, and she didn't seem to mind.

I came across poison and drank from it,
And suddenly she faded away.
Long enough for me acquire any vice I desire.

Years have gone by,
I suddenly craved her worries.
But it was too late, and I was far gone

I walked back to where I last saw her.
She wasn't there.
And so I looked for her ghosts far and wide.

Until I asked myself in frustration,
"Where have you gone?"

A small voice inside me spoke up:
"I was just waiting for you to have me back"

And I wept from day and night,
Softly feeling a presence surrounding me.
It was her hands caressing my watery cheeks.
Telling me everything is going to be alright

I've tried and tried once again
To forget the past that haunted me
The ghosts that once tore my soul
And left me with nothing but emptiness

And yet here you are
Unknowingly leaving your marks - your words
Searing me with burns and pain
Bleeding and screaming in the blinding darkness
That surrounds this eternal cycle

Should I concede and accept my defeat?
Putting a mark on it for my relief?
It is not selfish, oh dear no
I'm just trying to be obedient nothing more

Never weep if I decide that I shall pass on
I'm just granting you a wish
That I've always postponed

I have reasons and doubts
You are one cruel monster
That I can't always live without

You're tired of me
And I'm tired of my life
Nothing will stop me
I already lost the fight

But I accept no defeat
And I want a ***** battle
Which I want you to suffer
Until the end of time.

Hundreds of words left unsaid,
Between parting lovers' morose cries and hatred.
Silently mourning over cheery times spent together,
In a once upon a time hoping for forever.

Hundreds of miles away,
For both to forget every pain felt on that day.
When neither were happy and words said were nothing but harsh.
Yet despite the distance both still feel like they're on the same marsh.

Hundreds of chances given by fate,
But either were too hesitant to approach the other, and now it's too late.
Both wanted to give out a proper goodbye,
Yet again, they let fear rule their hearts and left the chance to fly.

Hundreds of years to move on,
But when one hears the name of the past lover, tears will be let on.
Because no matter what happened,
They once both loved one another  and that will never be forgotten.

Hundreds of poems written for one another,*
Yet neither knows about them meaning for each other.
For they are now strangers with remarkable memories,
In silent calm hours cherishing and reminiscing reveries.

Sometimes I wonder,
Is it a mistake to be born?
To face the harsh realities
To suffer under tyranny
To feel unwanted by all
Why bother living, the point of it all?

Does anyone really matter?
If all we do is die after a while
Chained to the idiosyncratic mediocrity
Unwittingly bestowed upon us all
We cease and decease like effervescence
Do we even have meaning?

Will everything be the same in death?
Or will our consciousness cease?
I wonder if someone succumbs to it,
Will they really leave anything behind?
Will people notice their absence?
I wonder.

I wonder.  
I wonder... if I die

Will I really die at all?
I'm ready.
I hope they are too.

Have a little faith
Have a little patience
Sit tight and he might come round the block

Have a nice chit-chat
Have a cup of tea
Is this what awaits thee?

Pretend you're awake
Pretend you're ever nonchalant
Until you're slapped by truth

He won't come
He doesn't love you
What have you been waiting for?

Nothing was ever mutual
And you were tranced
Tranced into false pretense

Hello, my dearest one.
After a bunch of failures, I felt like writing for you today.
For a while now, I have been torn and astray.
I wonder, where are you now?
I hope you are well and cheery.
Rest assured, remember that I'll always wait for you.

If this letter arrives to you a little bit late,
Please understand that I might push you away,
Or ignore you all the same
Forgive me if I do so, I've already been hurt by cruelty of the world.
I've been starting to think that nothing will ever change,
And yet nothing will ever stay the same.

Please allow me to tell you a few things,
Don't give up on me, even if it's easier to leave than to stay.
I'll always come around, no matter how broken I seem to be.
Keep your promises no matter how small,
Because I'll always treasure them all the same.
You don't have to shower me with lavish gifts,
Your presence will always be the best present I'll ever have.

I feel like I'm asking for so much now,
And I do apologize for that.
If you've done everything I've asked you to do and nothing works,
I am afraid to say that I am already far beyond repair,
And I can no longer turn back.
Let my old self thank you for trying.