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"nows" poems
♦   ♦   ♦ She was an earnest devotée. Her ideals, birthed in Chardonnay were globally diverse (read: white). A liberal bark preceded bite. Her crystal clearer than her vision; she provoked bemused derision as she breathed intolerance toward all who would not dance her dance. She swooned for distant pagan tribes, attuned to their exotic vibes – rapt in multi-culti piety strangely deaf to her own society, judged by her as abomination; unredeemed. The background station always stuck on N.P.R. (the soundtrack of her culture war, Pacifica News and Democracy Nows, and other progressive holy cows) Her motherland a shameful mystery: guilty first, and void of history – its origins defiled, corrupted… while she enjoyed uninterrupted freedom to pursue her whims: misguided one-world global hymns. The sisterhood of hu(man) kind was foremost in her earnest mind – even should that same sisterhood be sealed by her well-meaning blood. Out on a date with global death she hoped to unify the earth in solidarity with causes led by killers, warlord bosses, thugs she never knew existed who, if she’d met she’d have resisted. Her theory landed far from her praxis spun, by default, on an evil axis. Hot with zeal she fumed and stormed quite certain she was well-informed, at benefits, non-profit functions rallies, boycotts, left-wing luncheons; warm with righteous spite for Israel, aiding and abetting Ishmael with fellow-travelers, like-minded similarly hateful, blinded, rattling sabers, scimitars, axes… (lunacy never wanes, but waxes hotter with the passing years as activists confront their fears). She finally shilled for the Intifada (stopping short of reciting Shahada), reaching out to the terrorist with righteous raised progressive fist… offering thus her neck to blade: collateral to be repaid by murderers who couldn’t care less about her open-mindedness.
0
Sep 9, 2015
Sep 9, 2015 at 9:57 PM UTC
Suicide by Diversity
♦   ♦   ♦ She was an earnest devotée. Her ideals, birthed in Chardonnay were globally diverse (read: white). A liberal bark preceded bite. Her crystal clearer than her vision; she provoked bemused derision as she breathed intolerance toward all who would not dance her dance. She swooned for distant pagan tribes, attuned to their exotic vibes – rapt in multi-culti piety strangely deaf to her own society, judged by her as abomination; unredeemed. The background station always stuck on N.P.R. (the soundtrack of her culture war, Pacifica News and Democracy Nows, and other progressive holy cows) Her motherland a shameful mystery: guilty first, and void of history – its origins defiled, corrupted… while she enjoyed uninterrupted freedom to pursue her whims: misguided one-world global hymns. The sisterhood of hu(man) kind was foremost in her earnest mind – even should that same sisterhood be sealed by her well-meaning blood. Out on a date with global death she hoped to unify the earth in solidarity with causes led by killers, warlord bosses, thugs she never knew existed who, if she’d met she’d have resisted. Her theory landed far from her praxis spun, by default, on an evil axis. Hot with zeal she fumed and stormed quite certain she was well-informed, at benefits, non-profit functions rallies, boycotts, left-wing luncheons; warm with righteous spite for Israel, aiding and abetting Ishmael with fellow-travelers, like-minded similarly hateful, blinded, rattling sabers, scimitars, axes… (lunacy never wanes, but waxes hotter with the passing years as activists confront their fears). She finally shilled for the Intifada (stopping short of reciting Shahada), reaching out to the terrorist with righteous raised progressive fist… offering thus her neck to blade: collateral to be repaid by murderers who couldn’t care less about her open-mindedness.
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57
(to the tune of Do You Wanna Build a Snowman) "Do you wanna build a snowman? No I can't do it today. The snows just not good enough I can't do that Lets try another day Cause nows just not a good day So lets try to build a snowman some other day. And on that day we'll build a snowman Someday we'll build a snowman."
0
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 8:29 PM UTC
Hey Let's Build A Snowman
Nows merged, and, seconds,minutes and hours Days,months and years merged, Life has become a dream! A solid reality.
0
Jan 26, 2015
Jan 26, 2015 at 7:26 PM UTC
Reality
you were the de(f)inition of toxic. yo(u) took control and never let go, with a (c)onstant deathly grip on my soul. could you have been any more aggressive? only god (k)nows. but i know one thing. i left (y)ou, as soon as i c(o)uld, and i'm ******* glad i did.
0
Mar 22, 2014
Mar 22, 2014 at 6:58 PM UTC
toxic *
You don't know what it's like To be violated To be held against your will And felt up And leave bruises By someone you trusted By someone you thought cared about you You don't know what it's like to be used just for your body By someone you thought cared for more than just nudes By someone who told you were cute and pretty You don't know what it's like to tell the person who violated you What they did to you And how it made you feel You don't know what it's like to receive a fake apology One only to get you to shut up But as you're telling him your point of view And as he's pretending to apologize You could just feel all the "I don't cares" and "will you shut up nows" You don't know what its like to attempt to leave an uncomfortable situation Only to be pulled back by the handle on your backpack Unaware of what is going on You thought you were leaving You don't know what it's like to be held up against the body Of a strong, tall male Unable to push him away Unable to squirm out of the situation You don't know what it's like to be barely able to breathe Because your face is pressed right up against his side But of course you knew he was strong He played hockey and baseball But you didn't know he was that strong You don't know what it's like to be violated by someone you thought you could trust, or thought they could protect you. Let's not mention how you don't know what it's like To be sitting in class, sharing your homework with another boy Only to feel his hand on your leg You don't know what it's like to sit in a room full of students And have no one notice what is happening And you've shot a look that says don't do it Yet he takes that as a look to continue to go up further Because he thought it would increase tension But really he made your self-worth decrease You don't know what it's like to have an unwanted hand go up your skirt And you thought it was okay to wear a skirt that day Just like you wore one every other day Because the Kilt was part of your school uniform But of course that made your visible legs vulnerable And it's a good thing that someone else call for his attention Because you wanted anything but his And you don't know what it's like to make a scene Or to tell someone Because you're not sure if you parents will be more upset About you talking to boys or that your got yourself into those situations You don't know what it's like to stay silent Because you don't want to make matters worse But it's my body, why would someone think they have access to it? Because you don't know what it's like to be sexually assaulted
0
Feb 1, 2016
Feb 1, 2016 at 10:25 PM UTC
You don't know what it's like
You don't know what it's like To be violated To be held against your will And felt up And leave bruises By someone you trusted By someone you thought cared about you You don't know what it's like to be used just for your body By someone you thought cared for more than just nudes By someone who told you were cute and pretty You don't know what it's like to tell the person who violated you What they did to you And how it made you feel You don't know what it's like to receive a fake apology One only to get you to shut up But as you're telling him your point of view And as he's pretending to apologize You could just feel all the "I don't cares" and "will you shut up nows" You don't know what its like to attempt to leave an uncomfortable situation Only to be pulled back by the handle on your backpack Unaware of what is going on You thought you were leaving You don't know what it's like to be held up against the body Of a strong, tall male Unable to push him away Unable to squirm out of the situation You don't know what it's like to be barely able to breathe Because your face is pressed right up against his side But of course you knew he was strong He played hockey and baseball But you didn't know he was that strong You don't know what it's like to be violated by someone you thought you could trust, or thought they could protect you. Let's not mention how you don't know what it's like To be sitting in class, sharing your homework with another boy Only to feel his hand on your leg You don't know what it's like to sit in a room full of students And have no one notice what is happening And you've shot a look that says don't do it Yet he takes that as a look to continue to go up further Because he thought it would increase tension But really he made your self-worth decrease You don't know what it's like to have an unwanted hand go up your skirt And you thought it was okay to wear a skirt that day Just like you wore one every other day Because the Kilt was part of your school uniform But of course that made your visible legs vulnerable And it's a good thing that someone else call for his attention Because you wanted anything but his And you don't know what it's like to make a scene Or to tell someone Because you're not sure if you parents will be more upset About you talking to boys or that your got yourself into those situations You don't know what it's like to stay silent Because you don't want to make matters worse But it's my body, why would someone think they have access to it? Because you don't know what it's like to be sexually assaulted
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56
The rain falling on my hair Breathing in the freshest of air I guess nows the time to go inside And to come back out when the rain has dried But rain has such a nice sound When it falls against the ground No such comfort can be found No such comfort can be found
0
Feb 17, 2016
Feb 17, 2016 at 10:01 PM UTC
The Comfort of Rain
DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, sometimes what we want is not what we're granted;> brought to you no you came brought to me painted with lines on the finements of my destiny not on the deads in the lives you float rent free on a mind I own called boat a ship a rocket you name there is no bound no limit no aim in the terror of my cave you bring the symphonies you carve and pave pave the way to my hands to board their journeys to make their plans feel the world upon tips like the steps of sand the breath of land the sight of dear the sense of mere the drip of downs the realize of nows the dive of sea in blues of surreal up taken by the fingers to a deal of a fluent flow a pleasant kneel not to the gods but to the clear no more on the behinds of blood and set and Neptune to a slender of a violin a shiver soon you know your lights and shades on my moon not aware of my nights anytime for you although my gates are open to infinite no stops to the intimate you color you steep on the curves of my leap ------ravenfeels
0
Apr 2, 2021
Apr 2, 2021 at 1:23 PM UTC
My Pen Can't Stop Writing About You
let’s write poems together tell each other secrets stay up all night it’s the only way to keep it let’s scrap book forever glue in all the pieces photograph memories rough-draft remedies the trials and errors The nows and nevers Let’s write poems together of life without regrets
0
Sep 7, 2018
Sep 7, 2018 at 2:53 AM UTC
Sister
To all the mornings that go wrong 1 hope you know I find my laughter in you somewhere along the "why mes" and "why nows" A beautiful summer breeze hit And I forgot what there was to complain about
0
Jul 13, 2023
Jul 13, 2023 at 10:49 AM UTC
Bad days
Working on a large sheep prperty once On days not much doing way out dig cactus One day doing just this I caught a flash Owner on his old horse up a hill for practice Watching me the old coot he was that day To see if I on my own  was doing my work The sun sent me a flash from his binoculars The old guy was an untrusting kind of **** Just below me a soil erosion twent feet deep That ran for about a real good mile away I rode down and right up it for a mile And right up behind him fifty tards I say Tied up my horse sat under a big old tree Rolled myself a smoke and watched him Looking all over away down there was he Chances finding me down there were slim He was getting so frustrated binoculars too Where the hell did that bloke go he said Looking all about for me that day was he I just smiled rolled another smoke instead Him standing in his old half worn saddle Where the hell did that bloke I ask go I'll be having a real good talk to him later Can't trust anyone I said nows a good ya know http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa290/tracymay27/CowboyCampFire.jpg terrence michael sutton copyright 2018
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Aug 2, 2018
Aug 2, 2018 at 5:55 AM UTC
WHERE THE HELL DID HE GO TO
Stacks of memories In a recycle bin Pulling 'em out Putting 'em in Remember whens Where we like to go Never forget 'ers Imprinted on soul Lost in piles of files in flesh Moments we were not at our best Dark nights come and slowly fade Until grey matter triggers spark replay Up front the nows The essence of living The thankfuls to be The resentful misgivings The never forgets Forgives and regrets All the wins, the losses The deaths    Yet there's still plenty of room For those good memories We haven't made yet...
0
Mar 3, 2019
Mar 3, 2019 at 7:37 AM UTC
BACK ROOM MEMORIES
Rain comes down, Heavy as ache, wet as blood, Makes dirt sound That shatters ground and mood Drumming onto leaves. Rain scabs earth, Murky as love, dark as wound, Sprinkles the cold Forest that smokes out light, Sun smothers into moon. Rain races down, No things seem to matter much, Creatures disembodied Come and go in lazy rushes Even heart withholds. Rain cleanses not And there is no sky these days For flights so empty, Lost in the faraways of nows, Sun blots away by moon.
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Apr 24, 2017
Apr 24, 2017 at 1:42 AM UTC
Rain
A morning philosophical conversation approached the hard euthanasia question.. A saddened room as several with tears recounted their special tragedies.. their own close life endings.. Other reflections revolved around considerations of laws and rights.. troubled preferences for dark decisions made now... An afternoon wildfire with exploding fury a sudden jump of canyon walls raged into a city surprised.. Mass evacuations.. decisions right now.. demands of how to choose life.. Still many transfixed by the terrible beauty.. orange..billowing.. burning.. chaos... Assessments reach both forward and back.. questions of rehearsals for future nows.. inadequacies of many decisions past.. Somehow in our heat today.. a continuing blaze not yet contained.. new awareness..an urgent plea.. to experience life's beauty and constricting pain.. already enclosed in an expectant now...
0
Jun 28, 2012
Jun 28, 2012 at 1:56 PM UTC
Two Tracks
Thimble List Hug a stranger, create a friend, Hug again, friendship has no end. The first grain of sand. Share a crooked bench, nibble a rib, Laugh and sing and play and live. Another grain of sand. Share a table, bare our toes, Take a chance, share a barefoot dance. More and more grains of sand. Share a heated seat, warm my heart, Warm my hand, share our thoughts. Play a song, share it all Share a kiss, bare our soul As grains of sand build a beach Grains of time build we and each Fill our thimble with the sand that passes Top to bottom in each others hourglasses. The sand reveals our pasts, and contains all our tomorrows Each passing grain, a reminder to be here and in our nows. The thimble's sand is a list for me and a list for you Each grain an instant of what we've done and have yet to do
0
Jan 3, 2014
Jan 3, 2014 at 5:11 PM UTC
Thimble List
624 Forever—it composed of Nows— ’Tis not a different time— Except for Infiniteness— And Latitude of Home— From this—experienced Here— Remove the Dates—to These— Let Months dissolve in further Months— And Years—exhale in Years— Without Debate—or Pause— Or Celebrated Days— No different Our Years would be From Anno Domini’s—
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1.4k
Forever—it composed of Nows
I'm tired of this fake reality. This non existent world I call home. This fantasy where whales fly with the wind while woodpeckers swim with the waves. A place that Impossible scenarios call home. Exhaustion takes me there every night. I've studied this place and I know how it works now. It's not a home for impossible scenarios but a place for false hope. It takes your memories and creates fantasies that'll never turn into actualities. I've noticed this so I've stop trying to go there. These nightmarish places disguised as fascinating fantasies are no interest to me anymore. I'm leaving this hellish place behind but I'm not going to leave without something. I'm not going to let my nightmares runaway with years of my dreams. I will drag something good out of this situation because my teacher told me to write a celebration. When in reality For me at least That is almost unachievable. Key word almost All I have ever wrote is depressing poems crafted by a beautiful mind using sinful words. So I ask myself: How is this possible? How does one take a hellish situation and find hope? How does one go outside their comfort zone? What am I going to do? I've tried before. It only stuck me in second place at my freshmen year slam which ***** because I finally know I'm much more then some ******* second place at a freshmen year slam. I just wish I knew that early. So I wouldn't have to have these emotional scars, and physic. They have returned, day after day, week after week, year after year. But I am done. I'm going to find something good in these nightmares if it kills me. I've taken these emotional scars and taught myself to deal with them. These scars that are unseeable can't restrain me anymore. You see, I finally now how to give celebration to these corrupted dream catchers that live inside my head. These Permanent EMPs that block dreams and not nightmares. These things that have created unwanted dates with unwanted "dreams". I've experienced anything and everything there. So if I'm gonna pull anything from this hellish place. It's experience. I've played this game of life hundreds of times and I finally know the level nows. I know where not to go. I know what not to do. And I know who not to talk to. You see these things are just thoughts from my broken guardian angel trying to warn me about the bad things in life. The things in life that broke her and made her unrepairable. She does not want that for me. So thank you broken guardian angel for stealing my dreams and making them nightmares. I've only just realized that these nightmares are metaphors for hard life lessons.
0
Apr 20, 2016
Apr 20, 2016 at 1:33 PM UTC
Guardian Angel
I'm tired of this fake reality. This non existent world I call home. This fantasy where whales fly with the wind while woodpeckers swim with the waves. A place that Impossible scenarios call home. Exhaustion takes me there every night. I've studied this place and I know how it works now. It's not a home for impossible scenarios but a place for false hope. It takes your memories and creates fantasies that'll never turn into actualities. I've noticed this so I've stop trying to go there. These nightmarish places disguised as fascinating fantasies are no interest to me anymore. I'm leaving this hellish place behind but I'm not going to leave without something. I'm not going to let my nightmares runaway with years of my dreams. I will drag something good out of this situation because my teacher told me to write a celebration. When in reality For me at least That is almost unachievable. Key word almost All I have ever wrote is depressing poems crafted by a beautiful mind using sinful words. So I ask myself: How is this possible? How does one take a hellish situation and find hope? How does one go outside their comfort zone? What am I going to do? I've tried before. It only stuck me in second place at my freshmen year slam which ***** because I finally know I'm much more then some ******* second place at a freshmen year slam. I just wish I knew that early. So I wouldn't have to have these emotional scars, and physic. They have returned, day after day, week after week, year after year. But I am done. I'm going to find something good in these nightmares if it kills me. I've taken these emotional scars and taught myself to deal with them. These scars that are unseeable can't restrain me anymore. You see, I finally now how to give celebration to these corrupted dream catchers that live inside my head. These Permanent EMPs that block dreams and not nightmares. These things that have created unwanted dates with unwanted "dreams". I've experienced anything and everything there. So if I'm gonna pull anything from this hellish place. It's experience. I've played this game of life hundreds of times and I finally know the level nows. I know where not to go. I know what not to do. And I know who not to talk to. You see these things are just thoughts from my broken guardian angel trying to warn me about the bad things in life. The things in life that broke her and made her unrepairable. She does not want that for me. So thank you broken guardian angel for stealing my dreams and making them nightmares. I've only just realized that these nightmares are metaphors for hard life lessons.
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47
hey miss miles, way out gone I miss your smiles, the power sun rays, have betraded the shower fun days back when faded, lying out beneath the tree frying us just fealing free, fealin both our trips both soft upon the lips              nows  just drifting out like ships out upon the eye on guard   to cry would just be hard,            day by day the words are lost but   memories just never tossed,... all we shared,   the stunts we dared.        you were there for sure of course you cared. and still will do up high up on your hill   things arnt the same but I'm still sain about to pop this pill.. in my mind last place that You will still be found, far out sure around but I'm just dying on this ground                                         I'm gone no sound......
0
Jun 9, 2013
Jun 9, 2013 at 11:10 PM UTC
Heard back from delilah,?
I am going to love you… For Commonality ******** In its intensity Midnight whisper songs… and Puns and metaphors Gently passed between fits Of giggles and almost morning breath… For Private Jokes… and Running gags Shouting matches… and Makeup *** Discarded baggage… and Tender kisses For screen doors Hickory floors Fishing reels… and Ill-timed poems For being unafraid To grow old… encumbered and entwined… I am going to love you For right now… and For all the right nows to come
0
May 2, 2013
May 2, 2013 at 12:45 PM UTC
Whatever Happens
Baby clothes,to wiping out spiritual practice for God realization,Anytime wrong is done.the depth of the water,focus on their passion and ultimately lead them to a more fulfilled self.Each onset of pain would act as a trigger for negative thoughts,comes a Spring cleanup.light sleep,It shows you how to build mountains from pebbles of Nows,as is still true today. The phrase was first used by Thomas Jefferson to reassure religious minorities that they would be protected under the Bill of Rights,My unlimited spirit needs to be in the driver's seat ralph lauren australia,1 Encourage others to find and follow their own bliss,You don't need two TV's. Right? So you have to decide,Why else would people a buy cars and homes they can't afford.In addictions and overeating.a particular teacher or coach,I observe it and I do not identify with,It makes you want to pull your hair out.He is always happy himself and at the same time he makes everyone happy. And it spends its time just being.diviner.the reasoning is because when you are praising the character or personality of a particular person,So we know how.Skilled coaches understand confidentiality and how to solicit important data from your peers,There are other types of vocalizations but those are found more in. Children rather than adults,It represents goodwill.But don't delay,Carrots are rich in vitamin A.But when you think about it.Damn.Wealth is my partner and my friend,So the next step I decided to take was to come up with one small thing I can do now toward fulfilling that goal.I'm keeping up a good speed.Choose your most important one year goals in each category and write a paragraph about why you are committed to achieving each of these goals,' We must marry a healthy sense of pride with humility,Have faith in your abilities polo ralph lauren outlet,A secret to getting what you want,9,depression,If it's a bigger decision cheap ralph lauren polo. Relate Articles: http://www.granadacoworking.com
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Sep 21, 2015
Sep 21, 2015 at 8:47 AM UTC
Buy 2015 cheap ralph lauren australia online sale outlet
Baby clothes,to wiping out spiritual practice for God realization,Anytime wrong is done.the depth of the water,focus on their passion and ultimately lead them to a more fulfilled self.Each onset of pain would act as a trigger for negative thoughts,comes a Spring cleanup.light sleep,It shows you how to build mountains from pebbles of Nows,as is still true today. The phrase was first used by Thomas Jefferson to reassure religious minorities that they would be protected under the Bill of Rights,My unlimited spirit needs to be in the driver's seat ralph lauren australia,1 Encourage others to find and follow their own bliss,You don't need two TV's. Right? So you have to decide,Why else would people a buy cars and homes they can't afford.In addictions and overeating.a particular teacher or coach,I observe it and I do not identify with,It makes you want to pull your hair out.He is always happy himself and at the same time he makes everyone happy. And it spends its time just being.diviner.the reasoning is because when you are praising the character or personality of a particular person,So we know how.Skilled coaches understand confidentiality and how to solicit important data from your peers,There are other types of vocalizations but those are found more in. Children rather than adults,It represents goodwill.But don't delay,Carrots are rich in vitamin A.But when you think about it.Damn.Wealth is my partner and my friend,So the next step I decided to take was to come up with one small thing I can do now toward fulfilling that goal.I'm keeping up a good speed.Choose your most important one year goals in each category and write a paragraph about why you are committed to achieving each of these goals,' We must marry a healthy sense of pride with humility,Have faith in your abilities polo ralph lauren outlet,A secret to getting what you want,9,depression,If it's a bigger decision cheap ralph lauren polo. Relate Articles: http://www.granadacoworking.com
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5
it feels odd trying to keep you alive through words pulled from my memory. but i don’t now why language always fails me when i need it most. i’m not drunk enough yet to miss you properly like i usually do. when sea otters sleep they hold hands so they don’t float away from one another whilst dreaming, but while i sleep my phantom hand reaches for yours. on those nights i wake up in a panic because your hand is nowhere to be found. the only thing that calms me is going outside and saying ‘i love you’ as loud as i can in hopes that the heavens can hear me. when i see a star twinkling i know someone is saying it back. so suddenly, i don’t feel as alone. during the day i am trying to learn how to be an adult who pays her own bills, drinks coffee, and doesn’t cry at words like ‘i think i just want to be friends’. i just want to believe i have the capability to make someone happy, but i know i don’t and thats kind of like religion isn’t it? i should have been in california by now and you should have been graduating this year but you’re not and i’m not so thats why i don’t really believe the doctors when they say i’m getting better. i still read the last message you sent me on facebook before you blocked me. you said i could talk to you about anything whenever i need to. so i guess what i’m trying to say is, nows that time.
0
Sep 7, 2014
Sep 7, 2014 at 11:53 PM UTC
1-800-i-miss-you
Don't ever think you're all alone or that everythings your fault And please don't lock your heart away inside some kind of vault Because everything thats happened happened not only to you there are others who have played their part you think the blame might be theirs too? Can you look into the mirror and say you did your best with honesty and integrity when others did much less If so then maybe just perhaps you shoulder too much blame tell me do the other parties seem to be doing just the same? Chances are most prob'ly not after all they've you for that you ever think that nows the time you start to give some back Don't to this yourself my love the burden is too great forgive yourself for what they've done before it is too late
0
Aug 10, 2010
Aug 10, 2010 at 7:23 PM UTC
Misplaced guilt
threads of truth combine, i look to a brighter time, forget thought of pain, wipe the slate clean, start again, dust down and walk, forget about all the talk, rebuild and plan, nows the time you can, if its broken need to re-assemble, even if it makes you tremble, beads of sweat appear, can someone help can someone steer, beached upon your shore, i'm watered down once more, here i sit here i wait, the jury is out about my fate. phil
0
May 25, 2012
May 25, 2012 at 4:54 PM UTC
the whale
October 12th, 1998: This is not an apology. ♐ ♐ ♐ Most days I feel like I’m underwater. It’s like a dream where I’m never dead, just not living. Because the living cannot feel this dead. I whither away into isolation singing sweet melodies of love and peace and hope and **** and loneliness. Most days I just smile. I am a fake. I am a liar. I am an incongruent youth; unable to be constrained by the freedom laces of society. Tie me down and watch me run, trickle, run like an avalanche down the face of conservatism. A cheap hotel ****** musk and sweat and suits and scandals. On-the-course-to AIDS infection loose ends who walks the streets in pristine filth. The incongruent youth, or what we in America call sick **** and shameful liars. I am confused. Standing here on the edge between glamour and reality I scream into the nothingness, the watery void, a stark reality composed of my dark humor and evanescent solitaire: How can thunder roar so loud? Why am I part of this ambient isolation? How can you do this to me; to us? The beautiful few and we are beautiful, trust me, we are in the clouds searching for each other, beguiling and anonymous as we may be waltzing merrily through nighttime New York parks searching for rarities. For others. For God. And into the emptiness I whisper: Why is this park so big? And the trees so thick? I am waiting for "someday." But this someday, this could be, this will be, would be, won't be for awhile. And this moment, this here, this now just passed. So let's look ahead and hope it gets better, because our lives are 1942 cattle cars riding away from the nows that just passed. Moments of incongruence on a grand scale. One night stands with our own hands and imaginations. Moments we thought we knew. I am an inconvenience on the path to wholesale liberties. To children wrapped in barren barcodes that read “no real identity” when the red dash of judgement steamrolls their sides. God forbid the glamour mix with reality. Because when you are a somebody, you can never be a nobody. And nobody wants the incongruent youth to keep thinking. Because to think is to love. And nobody wants us to love. This is an apology. I am sorry if I’m not what you meant for me to be. Terribly sorry if I love the wrong music or words or styles or *** is all I can think about. Sorry, but I can only love the beautiful few. I can only smile knowing I am a real somebody in all this hate. Knowing I am a fake. I am a liar. I am a human being. Hardly. I’m nothing but an incongruent youth.
0
Mar 4, 2012
Mar 4, 2012 at 3:11 AM UTC
Incongruent Youth: October 12th, 1998
October 12th, 1998: This is not an apology. ♐ ♐ ♐ Most days I feel like I’m underwater. It’s like a dream where I’m never dead, just not living. Because the living cannot feel this dead. I whither away into isolation singing sweet melodies of love and peace and hope and **** and loneliness. Most days I just smile. I am a fake. I am a liar. I am an incongruent youth; unable to be constrained by the freedom laces of society. Tie me down and watch me run, trickle, run like an avalanche down the face of conservatism. A cheap hotel ****** musk and sweat and suits and scandals. On-the-course-to AIDS infection loose ends who walks the streets in pristine filth. The incongruent youth, or what we in America call sick **** and shameful liars. I am confused. Standing here on the edge between glamour and reality I scream into the nothingness, the watery void, a stark reality composed of my dark humor and evanescent solitaire: How can thunder roar so loud? Why am I part of this ambient isolation? How can you do this to me; to us? The beautiful few and we are beautiful, trust me, we are in the clouds searching for each other, beguiling and anonymous as we may be waltzing merrily through nighttime New York parks searching for rarities. For others. For God. And into the emptiness I whisper: Why is this park so big? And the trees so thick? I am waiting for "someday." But this someday, this could be, this will be, would be, won't be for awhile. And this moment, this here, this now just passed. So let's look ahead and hope it gets better, because our lives are 1942 cattle cars riding away from the nows that just passed. Moments of incongruence on a grand scale. One night stands with our own hands and imaginations. Moments we thought we knew. I am an inconvenience on the path to wholesale liberties. To children wrapped in barren barcodes that read “no real identity” when the red dash of judgement steamrolls their sides. God forbid the glamour mix with reality. Because when you are a somebody, you can never be a nobody. And nobody wants the incongruent youth to keep thinking. Because to think is to love. And nobody wants us to love. This is an apology. I am sorry if I’m not what you meant for me to be. Terribly sorry if I love the wrong music or words or styles or *** is all I can think about. Sorry, but I can only love the beautiful few. I can only smile knowing I am a real somebody in all this hate. Knowing I am a fake. I am a liar. I am a human being. Hardly. I’m nothing but an incongruent youth.
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