I am afraid of lots of things
But mostly of myself
Because I love
Too hard
And I fall
Too hard
And I hit the ground
Too hard
I’m not sure I can get up this time

My soul is flying
I am an adrenaline ******
High on the excitement
Of being alive
I am in love
With this wild ride
Called living

I am impatient with information
I flip to the back of a book
To preview the ending
I don’t like surprises
I read the plot for a movie
Before I ever see it
Just so I always know
Exactly what comes next
You cannot read people like a book
And there’s no plot guide
For relationships
But I always try to spot the end
Before it’s near

I have a rock
With my name on it
And one for my father
And one for my brother
And one for each of the boys
Who broke me

They are grudges I carry with me
Heavy in my pockets
One step away  
From the cement blocks
Tied to my feet

Someday I will throw these grudges
As far as my body will allow
In hopes that they land in water
Less shallow
Than the names on the rocks