So close
To the fateful day
So close
To what I've strived for
So close
I've told all my friends
So close
Can't afford a mistake
So close
Can't afford miscommunication
So close
Must plan carefully
So close
Musn't lose my chance
So close
Need to stop overthinking
So close
Need to do my research
So close
Don't mess it up
So close
Be careful
So close
And yet so far
In the middle
But so near the end
Just not there
Too far gone
To go back
Or try again


I messed it up, didn't I?

And so the shoe drops,
Easily, easily
It’s much easier for you to wound me,
than wear your human mask over lizard skin.
You gnash your teeth and flail your limbs,
like a stupid ******* lizard person.
How hard is it to check in when you’ve said something so worrying?
How hard is it to speak?
Or is it just that words don’t issue,
from betwixt your lizard beak?

they're here, i said, we've gotta run fast.
who's here, he said.
they're here to get me, i said, don't you hear them?
hear what, he said.
the voices, i said, the scraping on the wall, getting closer and closer and closer and closer... they're going to hurt me, they're going to.
you're okay, he said
they're hurting me, i said, they're here, right here, it hurts.
they're not, he said, it's all in your head.
deep breath, deep breath, now open your eyes.

I worry about the future,
I worry about the past,
I worry about worrying and
How long will worry last.

I'm happy with my family,
I really love my wife.
I'm happy being happy
I really love my life.

It all boils down to perception,
Am I worried, happy, sad?
Step back and see you have all you need and enjoyed the things you had.

Don't worry about the future,
Don't worry about the past.
Don't worry about worrying,
Smile, laugh, cry, it's all part of life's blast.

with each day that slowly trickles by
i try not to give up on the hope of the
effervescent tomorrow

I have a dilemma in heart and mind
My brain to me is so unkind
Do I suppress my evil thoughts
With a measly prescription, store bought?
I’m staying strong for him
But some days depression wins
And my anger bubbles up
So instead I wash it down with a cup
Of water and a little nauseating pill
It’s blue and powerful, it often makes me ill
I worry to start again
Because I could barely stop back then
It’s not worth the toll
So I flush them down the toilet bowl

Wasting time, hours spent doing nothing.
She once thought she could hold the world in her hands,
stand on mountains and face the gods.
Now she's stuck. Lost, trapped and out of time.

She worries about time, watching clocks tick by;
her hours are spent trembling, anxious of the rising sun.
The moon holds her gaze, gleaming down from her kitchen window.
"Why did you leave me?" she calls out, eyes sorrowful.

The moon just stares, fixated on the girl in the window.
Time keeps ticking by, the moon turning into the sun.
As the rising dawn arrives, setting fire to the cold sky,
she holds her head high and whispers,

"The sun will always rise." The sun smiles back,
radiating warmth that keeps her from turning to stone.
Smashing the clock, shattering glass on stone floors.
The girl breaths a sigh, the clock's ticking stopping.