You medicate my mind, but inside I know I'm dying by your hand alone; yet, my body cries out for more. The high is unlike anything the world could otherwise have shown me, lifting the world off my shoulders. Alas, Atlas, at least you got to breathe the breathe of a Goddess. Green dress, and red hair, so ******* gorgeous, her essence seeping into my stream of Being. My hearts racing, my thoughts, tracing the outline of space and time, encasing Your face in form, accepting my fate and yearning for more... As you gently lay me down, back to dirt, my mind is clouded and my eyes are purple, and I recall a journey, but my memory is hazy, and I'm so tired... To sleep now, and dream of your touch, is all I desire, for tomorrow comes with no mercy, and I must continue on my own... until you call my name, again.

Alex is the best, even when she wants to die.
The whole world sits and waits, 'until she doesn't want to die.
We're both only sixteen, skipping class to smoke ****.
In her brother's house, we saw it on TV, we left immediately.

And the light comes through the window and shines,
Off the stem of her brother's crackpipe.

Alex is my friend, we meet up after school
Her brother knows a guy, who can sell me lots of pills
Lying on her back, she says she wants to die
Then she buys a gram of coke, and she doesn’t want to die.

Summer storm makes for a blackened sky
I wonder where Alex is tonight

I'm feeling so tired now, always complaining about my day
Feeling so tired now
I wanna live another way
Don't wanna get lost in the clouds
I wanna drink my life away

I wanna feel the same
I wanna feel the same
Don't wanna feel the same
Dont wanna feel the same

I'm feeling more than High I don't mind
You're not a thought on my mind
And when your coming down
She'll be there by your side

Don't wanna feel the same
Don't wanna feel the same
Don't wanna feel the Same
Don't wanna feel, don't wanna feel the
same

I remember a time when I felt happy
Waking up everyday was a new adventure
Some people would say things behind my back,
But I didn't care

I just carried on

I would stroll leisurely into the classroom,
Take off my shoes at the door because I picked at them
Sit down at my desk, right at the front because I couldn't focus sitting next to anyone

And just carried on

I would pick my spiky, plastic ball off of the desk I sat at,
Constantly fidget with it, resist the urge to place it in my mouth
And bite off the spikes, feel satisfaction. Sometimes I could resist.
Other times I couldn't, but I didn't care

I just carried on

That was back when I was in Year Four, in a class filled with students
Who, despite not knowing the word ***** would be one anyways
Only admiring me for my intellect, like when I suggested the word Bioluminescence as a favourite word and the teacher thought it wasn't even a word, because surely I was too young to know it?

Somehow, I carried on

Now, looking back on those days I ask myself,
When did my strength fade? The world become grey?
How can someone so innocent, so lonely, so... weak,
Be so strong and resistant?

How did I be me, and manage to carry on?

When nowadays I am constantly suppressed by society,
I can't be me without being called a ******, a loser,
Loner and so ****** up that surely I'm a stoner?

Doesn't matter that I hate drugs, my "friends" do drugs,
Smoke **** and make fun of me because I don't,
That God forbid I'm clean, don't **** with that ****,
Never will and never have, but this means that they can be mean?

How have I carried on, for so long, falling prey to those call me friend
And fade away faster than the light of day whilst vaping it up,
Faded as ****,
When all along I believed I wasn't strong?

I look at them and see no hope, no future
Not for me in that direction, at least
And I've told them time and again
That it's so ******* wrong, that there will come a time when hitting up the **** won't carry you further along anymore

There will be a time when they will fail to carry on

Maybe I still got some of me left in me
There's more on the inside than what the eye can see
Believe in myself, listen to no-one else and honestly?

I truly believe I still have the strength to carry on

Might be clichéd the the leaf is the inspiration
But when I hit it I'm in a different nation
I feel like when I'm up there
There's no fear
I'm in a different place worried about no body
all my thoughts go away
insecurities go to play
its just a place of good feelings
good vibes, good thoughts
genuinely in my happy place
the leaf makes me feel like a new person
like I could go out and conquer the world
but when I get down from cloud 9
Thinking I'm still gonna have a good time
I come down and realise things still aren't fine.

"Stoner's Poem"

I see your snapstories,
I see your ask profile.
I see how you comment and reply and flaunt your English skills.
Trust me, I love your rebuttals,
More than Biryani and the Lebanese pornstar.
I see your Facebook posts,
I see your WordPress,
And I see, how you craft your poems flamboyantly,
And then, and then,
Pilfer my breath,
And rob my me.
Sometimes, just sometimes,
Your deportment bewilders me,
More than Lowry-Bronsted's theory.
I see how you dance in the rain,
Like "All, sin, tan, cos", do in my brain.
I see how you frequent every segment of my cardiac muscle,
And then desert it, like it's one of the many dilapidated constructions.
My reminiscences about your thingness,
Escalate me to a higher spiritual level,
More than **** does.
Oh, that smile,
Oh, that look,
Oh, the mystique in you.
And again, I am writing of Love.
And the pen doesn't seem to stop soon,
For I have taken a greater risk,
Than asking my friend about cathodes and anodes and electrolysis, while I took my last chemistry exam,
When the invigilator was around.

a tab, a hit, a smoke,
lets roll, lets drink, lets ****.

my pupils shrink, and then dilate
another line confirms my fate

such pure, unprecedented ecstasy
takes all my pain away from me

a tab, a hit, a pill,
a smoke, a dab, a thrill.

no judgement, fear, regret,
as we make another bet,

i can take another dab
if you can take another tab.

too much, its done, too late
the addict has found her mate.

I love when you all over my lips
And it's the same air that you and I breathe.
As I take you to cleanse my soul
With each breath I take you in.

Why would I ever want to leave,
When you keep me afloat when I'm drowning in my tears
And vanish with my fears when I prophesy the future bleak.

I blow you one last kiss,bye,
As you burn,while you whisper with the winds "everything's all right"

They look at the sky for hope they need
They look to their side to find a mate to meet
They look down to cultivate their ****
They come from the sun to eliminate routine