I am terrified of what my age has become
Calling the weridos Gay because they don't fit in
Calling their friends whes and Fkboys because of their genders
they say everything is Stigma free but look around
It sure isn't
I am terrified my Anxiety might show and I'll have to just brush it off
as those who look at me weird because of this illness
My Grade doesn't understand that words can hurt
They say oh words don't hurt the tone  does
But A man can scream at a woman" You're a S**T!" or can say it Monotoned
Both sentences will hurt that woman the same
Those kids laughed when 13 reasons why came out
Not grasping that the show was specifically for them
That people feel this way and that it isn't some comedy act

They don't understand why my voice stutters whenever I speak
Or that my hand writing is bad because of my weak hands
To them all I am is a weird girl who cried during a project because of something I lived through

I am terrified of what my grade has become
That they have lost all common sense
They say no one is born equal but they won't even try to help
They just laugh at those who seem different
And it is stupid

They make fun and harass those who aren't like them
and the Administration turns a blind eye
Saying Oh boys will be boys or that they were only just having fun
Well you know what you can have fun and not make someone cry for  your own pleasure

I'm terrified of what my Grade has become because soon they won't realize what they are doing is wrong
I stress that I won't ***** up that my grades are good that I make a good impression
My Grade says they have stress
But They don't know what real stress is until you are sick from the stress you have
They don't know what real stress is until you can't think back to a time that you ever relaxed
They don't know what real stress is until you have realized you haven't eaten all day because you were too busy worrying about that grade you got on the insignificant quiz  

I am Terrified about my grade because soon we will be adults and they will not be able to know right from wrong

Its scary
As time passes
I wonder
Am I wasting my time?
Am I wasting my life?
It terrifies me that I might never be able to do those things
That maybe in the future I wont be bringing justice to the world
Even if not those, what if I end up doing nothing
What if I end up becoming nothing?

I am terrified.
I am terrified.
I am complete and utterly terrified.

The fine china that is my heart
Can disintegrate at just one word.
Will you hold it gently,
Or toss it to the curb?

Sometimes I regret ever giving it to you,
Was it worth the risk?
I wouldn’t take it back, though,
I loved it when we kissed.

It scares me so much I know how much
I get hurt at the simplest of words,
Never mind losing someone like you,
It would feel like the end of the world.

I know I sound so stupid
You just mean so much to me already.
I fall so fast and hard, especially
For a girl with a heart this unstable.

Screaming in silent hues
Into the sky, diffuse
Like my mind that I abused
My trepidation from it oozed.

I try to keep, but in vain
My broken thoughts inside my brain
Out of control, they proved bane
Never content within their terrain

And when all is ordained and said
I look down at my palms with dread
Glaring in disgrace and sins of red
The person in the mirror is dead

They say endings are scary
Again, what do they know?
Maybe they’re just guessing
Perhaps, going with the flow

Endings could be peaceful
Of endings I’m not scared
They are regretful that’s all
But my whole life I’ve dared

Endings could be happy
Of endings I’m not scared
They are just very guilty
Of things they hadn’t shared

Endings could be calming
Of endings I’m not scared
They’re just anxious because
They’ll witness all that they feared

Endings could be nice
It’s probably not, I lied
I’m not just scared of endings
Truth is, I’m terrified.

walking in a fog
once you get out
you realize
you have been walking
in water
the whole time

you're drowning

just hit my second decade
will it be my last?

are the questions
I ask in uni
worth the breath
I waste on it?

the papers I write,
the presentations I complete,
is anything worth it?

no one knows