We had a most horrid schoolteacher,
And us children did all hate her,
She’d shout at us for no real reason,
And threaten to see us later,
She had a dip on a Florida trip,
And was swallowed by an alligator,
But only crocodile tears were shed,
‘Cos we were all just … gladiator!

I am yours.
I have no choice and I don't want to choose,
I am yours.
In your womb started the journey,
I am yours.
Besides any hate or stumble and our great disagreements,
I am yours.
Not because you made me, because you fed me your holy milk and the serum of words,
I am yours.
Through every night awake I always thought of you,
I am yours.
You are as sincere as a sharp blade and I love it,
I am yours.
I have never cried for a woman the way I cry for you,
I am yours, my first teacher, my eternal goddess.

If I were to do it all again I'd tell my mother that I was sorry
I'd tell my brother that I love him
And I'd tell my best friend that
Maybe the skirt was a little too short for brunch with the parents

I'd tell my sister that I wish I had an ounce of her integrity
I'd thank my coach for believing in me
I'd kiss my teacher on both cheeks
For not leaving me in the hallway crying
I'd thank her for being my only friend for almost an entire year
I'd thank her for carrying me on her shoulders for so long
But most of all I'd thank her for letting go at the right moment

If I were to do it all again
I'd be more honest
Not blunt.
Because blunt is uncompromisingly forthright
And I, for one, give a ****.

If I were to do it all again
I'd understand that in order to get to "success"
I'd have to climb the thousand feet tall ladder called "fear"

If I were to do it all again
I'd jump out of the plane on two
Because people hold on to the edges at three

If I were to do it all again...
Man I'd be at the top of that ladder

"If you are pushy rude or crass,
I have not a minute to spare"

Dear Teacher,
What have I learned from you?

The world is not really as it seems
And now I know what '*******' really means.

I know that the world won't stop for me,
Not matter how bad I wish it to.

That no matter what,
Trying won't get you anywhere, but doing will.

That no matter where,
What I learned is really useful.

That no matter when,
There is always time to read, think, and analyse.

Thank you for teaching me this year.

Long ago, way back when,
I was teaching five year olds then,
The funniest things happen to me,
One day I had different coloured shoes, you see,
One brown, one blue, gross, prithee,
Preps said very loudly to me,
"You're the silliest teacher we've ever seen."
So much for teaching them literacy,
The joke was on me, quite definitely,
Still, I guess I can survive anything,
It's called my worst day of teaching.......

Thank you for the year, of fun and cheer,
Thank you for the education,
Now soon we will all be on vacation
Thank you for the year we shared
It is nice to know you cared
Here is a card,
That I worked on really hard.