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Birds sing and fly
With a freedom not for I
As my heart's stinging lullaby
Sounds like a despairing cry

For I can see the sunshine
Brightening the sky
And yet I am confined, again,
In the darkness of my mind.
Hello again,
Little one

It's been five whole years now,
Can you believe?

How time passes with the falling of each leaf,

How I always got to love you
But we never got to meet?

I get sad sometimes,
Thinking of your little feet

The way you might have cried so much
That I would never sleep

But it's that time of year again, little one
And once again, I weep

Because you are the greatest love
I never got to keep.
how can you say goodbye if you never got to say hello?
insomniatrical Oct 2022
how does it feel to be this cold?

so much now
that not even
the raging flame
of your self hatred
can keep you warm anymore
Forgive the title, I'm lacking in inspo but I still like memes
insomniatrical Oct 2022
Once again, it comes again,
Chase away the hunger with cigarettes
And don't give in

I watch the numbers bob up and down,
A water park of emotion
And I feel that I will drown

Watering myself like a plant,
I need only sunshine and water and that's it,
And I wish I could stop but I can't

Every day the numbers get smaller
I start to feel so little
But the demon in me grows taller

My mom loves having 'skinny kids,'
Never mind my health
I just have to see my ribs

I think I'm cursed

It got into my head,

It's never been worse

I won't eat until I'm dead.
insomniatrical Jun 2022
oh god, no
leave me be

dreams of you are ruining my sleep

run away,
far, far, away

in those terrible white heels i see

plaguing me
you wore a baby blue and white boho dress

and it wounds me
as it sits in my closet
because I haven't touched it since

it was yours, in my mind.
always yours
from the moment the fabric graced your hips
and that smile spread on your lips
and you turned into someone new

there was something about the ensemble,
later that night
inhibition melted away and I saw the real you for a moment,
or a few

strange that you are so many complex people
wrapped into one shallow being

that you would be scared to show me again who you were once truly
as if the entire world watched through my eyes

but I can promise, friend no longer,
it was only myself, and my whole self,
who watched you
in hatred and admiration
insomniatrical Mar 2022
so happy lately
maybe it's you baby
write me a song about hazy days
we sing and we dance on the daily
aren't we crazy
reaching so far for the stars
we get spacey
you're singing to me in the car
how did we get so close to home
by running so far but never alone
speeding and crashing together in the snow like
your arms are where i was destined to go
and my soul is the only one that you wanna know
we're spinning and feeling
unreeling and healing
if i was a liar i'd claim that you were stealing
my heart but i can only scream at the top of my lungs
that oh, Sunshine
my Love, my Light
i am giving it to you
every day
and every night
insomniatrical Feb 2022
He liked one of the songs I played
So much
That he saved it
He plays it
Doing the dishes

He sways against me and sings in my ear
Softly, sweetly
Like a person discovering love
He sings songs he knows,
And songs of his own

Twisting his fingers with mine
Smooth and warm
On the palm of my hand

He is a constant concert,
I dance and hum in tune
The rhythm of his words
From the morning
To the afternoon
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