The word peace
Conjures up images of hippies
In tie dye shirts
And flowers in their hair
But Personal peace
Now there is something there
Bubbles floating
In the steaming bath tub
That makes me feel like
A rose petal
In a hibiscus tea
Melting me into
A softer side of me
As I dose to sleep

Mornings rise
And I breath in
Breath out
Mantra moments
Spent with an app
That filters into my body
And let’s go of the crap
Of noises and neighbors
Of people who blather
On and on
This stream
A river
Of unconscious anger
Yet it has become a leaf
In my tree
I breath in
I breath out
Letting my branches stretch
Farther
As I repeat the mantra
I embrace all of the good in me
I embrace love, life and harmony

She who spoke with no love,
waited on external acceptance
That, it never came

She who found comfort in a shell
Delicate and golden, but unrecognizable
to a polluted mind

She who bowed to insecurity
Scoured and torched by internal pain
She no longer seeks to remain

And she no longer will.

High and noble
clawing back up to confidence
the fractionalized ebb and flow of my self-development
It sinks to laze and despair
then comes back with newfound action and plans
Just constricting and expanding
in the entropy of a universe
where everything else does the same (collapse)
recognizing so I can do better than better each time
Wondering if it's just my body
What pills did I did or did not take?
What did I or did not eat?
One weekend off and I'm knocked out
but what's worse
the routine or the break?

While secret angels watch my steps
I walk inside a maze at night
I've heard about an ancient myth
excitement grows, so I turn right

I find small cracks in glossy walls
the maze it lights all by itself
how could this be? Inside this cleft?
I walk and wonder, then turn left.

No, right it was, or how was this?
I get confused by all this “same”,
all cracked up walls, although in light
I start to feel the loss of bliss.

How could I think that this was smart!
Or wait a minute - never did,
just heard this myth and wanted more,
it speaked all clear and bright to heart.

And now, the longest passageway,
in endless steps I walk again
and maybe now I wished I stayed
in velvet bed, escaped from rain.

But here I am, oh well I might
as well begin to find the trail
I dreamt of clouds and ancient arts
and in this room: I found The Grail.

But now I heard this strangest noise
a growl or something from within
it was like screams from forest depths
and I'm quite sure it's not my kin.

I want to turn, to go back home,
but all behind me stops to glow
It's like I need to see and choose
what's done is done, and now I know.

So choice is made, I have to walk
towards this creature in the night
although the screams get to my bones,
I walk with safe and loving light.

Oh my, these walls! But finally!
I get to see an end in sight,
and now, this ends quite frightfully
my meeting with the darkest night.

And there it is, this beast of old
it searches in the open air
a beast like this with feet of mold
with *****, smelly, ugly hair.

It senses me, yes this I see,
but now it's quiet as myself
it's like it asks me of my plea
it hurts and cries - like inner self.

At end I dare to get it close,
it's blind, it doesn't see me there,
but oh, it senses and it knows
and in its eye I see a tear.

I touch its head, and then I feel,
this growling deep inside of me
a sorrow lost, I need to kneel
I need to set this feeling free.

And now the beast, it starts to glow,
its eyes can see the sights again,
and I feel inner peace and flow
and heavy, healing, pouring rain.

The secret angels reappear
and give me smiles of warmth and love
they free the beast from chain and snare
and then return back to above.

At last I stand, alone in maze
I thought was meant for Holy Grail
but all was test of inner praise
of mind and body, although frail.

"I will not live to refine
mediocrity"