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Arreonna Frost May 2016
"What are you doing?" She asked with a hint of fear.
When she saw me,
all alone,
on my bed,
with tears in my eyes.

"Are you okay?" "Do you need a doctor?" She asked,
as the blood dripped down my arm,
and onto my white towel,
staining it red.

My bony thighs with the words,
'fat' engraved onto my skin.
My ribs were poking out of my stomach,
I haven't eaten in days.

"Can't you see,
see what you have done to me!" I yelled.
One move and I'll be gone-
I began to shake,
more like shivering.

Shivering from fear,
shivering from coldness,
hitting my tiny fragile bones.
One move and I'll be gone-

I push my mother out of my room,
and latch the door.
She is pounding,
pounding harder and harder,
screaming for me to let her in,
as she sobs and sobs.

Everything goes silent,
my thoughts begin to race,
and all I can hear is the beating of my heart.
I take the blade in one hand,
with a handful of pills in the other
One move and I'll be gone-

Slowly I press down,
harder and harder,
and the blood starts to pour out.
I swallow the pills,
and soon fall into a deep deep sleep.
Never to feel the pain,
ever again.

One move and I was gone.
All from a fight.
My mom finally gets the door open,
and falls to her knees.

Nothing will ever ever take back,
what she just saw.
Her daughter just laying there.
Still-
lifeless-
5/15/16 **TRIGGER WARNING**
Nora May 2016
highs **** pain
from lows and
gains will gamble
death, russian
roulette from
morphine shots
will always take
you gently
Lauren R May 2016
I feel myself falling asleep on the staircase we sat on when you told me for the first time, out loud, that you wanted to die. I can feel the dead breath of winter. I can feel the slow drifting of snow onto my trembling hands and the unforgiving stillness of the concrete beneath me. I can feel your shaking and nonexistent forgiveness towards your own knotting fingers.

I can feel myself dozing off on the carpet you opened your veins and popped the seams of your skin on. I can feel the warm wetness of iron that once flowed through your arteries envelop my eyelids. I can feel your knife saw through my untouched hair. I can feel the soft edge of your cheek turn salty with tears. I can feel the cloth you gag yourself fill my mouth with cotton and the grooves of my teeth with formaldehyde.

I can feel myself awakening in the pill bottle that used to be full. I can feel the milligrams come in doctors note waves. I can feel the ***** climb from the back of my throat. I can feel the dizzy relief of holding back poison. I can feel your sinking regret and all 25 pills of its predecessors wringing your brain out.

I can feel myself opening my eyes in your casket. It is not empty. I can feel the burden of your body beneath me. I can feel the tough leather of your rope burned neck and the dull heat of my skin desperately trying to awaken yours.

Gone is sometimes not an adjective. He is a noun. And he is haunting my dreams.
I went through a lot of scary **** with someone
Rotten Meat Apr 2016
I cry full in tears tonight
Lost, not knowing what's going on
I want to rewind
I want to just start over

Why am I who I am now?
That month in 7th grade,
Changed who I really was, completely
This is what I've become

I don't want to be here anymore
My cover is ruined
Can it just be the end of the story?
This is like a never ending book

As I lie down on my bed
I held the pills in my hands
15 of them,
My hands began to tremble

I put the pills back
And held onto 'his' jacket
He let's me have it for a couple of days
I find comfort, when he's not around

I tell myself: Everything is gonna be alright
But no, it's not
Nothing is going to be the same
Can I just disappear for a while?

I don't know what to do
Feel so lost
Insecure
Never felt this in a while

Its another new day
Forget it
He'll be there for you
Just forget what has happened

I've swallowed the pain for 6 years
Not telling anyone about it
Not asking for help
Just kept it silent

So I can move on from this
I'll be alright
But I know I won't be the same
I'll be changing again

Still, as I sit here in the classroom
Wearing 'his' jacket
I don't know what to do
I just don't want to go home

I feel safe around him
He gives me comfort
I wish I could be next to him tonight
I wish I could

Just breathe, you're gonna be alright
He's there for me, always
I trust him
I'll  be alright

Still, as I go about my day
I can't stop thinking about what happened
I don't want to go home
Don't feel safe there anymore

My overreacting thoughts
Eased as I think about him
Not a day he's not on my mind
Today, I find comfort,

as his arms wrap around me
Purple Rain Apr 2016
Sometimes it's the love you lost that hurts the most
Looking for that girl Coast to Coast
She never will come back is What Hurts the Most
Being stuck in a day dream
Thinking of her lately
Remembering the time I give flowers to my baby
Now I'm asking God
Please save me
For my long lost love remembers me vaguely
Sometimes the love you lost that Hurts the Most
Frozen in Time on a love overdose
Writing about someone I lost forever ago...
Julia Mae Apr 2016
59.
there's nothing here
i choked on thirty pills
of brain killing chemicals
couldn't think, couldn't think
couldn't walk, couldn't talk
couldn't sleep, couldn't sleep
laid me to rest in my bed
there was blood all over the pen
my mouth became glued shut
couldn't cry for help if i wanted
but help wasn't here
when i was here
why should it be here now?
because i'm finally fading?
is this why there are so many funerals
for the ones life taking?
did life finally make sense
as i was lowered into the ground?
don't love me now -
i may have been born
just to die
there's nothing here now
choked on thirty pills ...
fifty pills ...
brain dead
i just wanted rest

don't love me in my afterlife
when you couldn't love my present life
Zane McHarris Feb 2016
I look
But your eyes are blind
I see you  
I try to show you what I see
In hope of a single
Beautiful moment Together

Shunned
Alone my hands are blind
I see you
I try to imagine the moment
One beautiful moment
Alone

Desperate
I search for something
I swallow the tab
To take me somewhere beautiful
Communication fails
As I succumb

I chase
Hoping to find you
But you've left
I've taken too much for myself
I fall to the floor in a
Beautiful Death
m i a Feb 2016
and oh boy i overdose,
i want off of this roller coaster
you take me high just to bring me
d
o
  w
    n.
and oh yes you bring me down.
alessia cara is beauts.
Shay Jan 2016
Bottles without their seals or caps - just sitting there,
little foil packets torn open in despair
empty of their contents to make me feel less blue,
leaving nothing in the bottom but white residue.

A pile of poison o' so sweet in a capsule form bundle,
travels down the claustrophobic and murky tunnel,
and sits within the pit of my stomach with it all
drowning in a stream composed of ethanol.

Euphoria sweeps through my veins,
I dance; a ballerina at 4am,
making the very most of my ability
knowing I'll soon breathe my last with docility.
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