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Nightmare Feb 11
Smear, trickle, tumble
The smell of iron from the red
Ties our senses together

Oh how I wonder where his mind went
For his eyes were shadowed
And his face was someone else

Yet, he started to cry a faceless cry
This correlates with a short story I'm currently writing
Nightmare May 2018
You are not a number
Like a calander, keeping track
Like the data of your sobriety

Or the days you kept counting, in order to see progress

You are not a percentage
Like on a computer listing your school progress
Like the calculations you make of whether you belong or not

You are human
Special in many ways
Different, but unique

But most importantly,

You are you
One of a kind
  Oct 2017 Nightmare
I could talk about the black holes you have for eyes
It's like the light gets lost in those hazel eyes that see nothing but pride
Not by chance did we meet but it felt like my world was put in place
You've never questioned me
Saw me through my worst and best
you said before we fell in love you had never heard me laugh so whole heartedly
I can't say you complete me because it's your black hole eyes that ****** in me into your chest in between your ribs and settled into your warm heart that I desperately try to hold while we lay in each other's arms
and I place my hand over your heart just to make sure I can make you feel so breathless like you make me
You never completed me you took over me
I've been heartbroken so many times and for all the wrong reasons and I'm clinging to you so pathetically praying to the god I never believed in
That maybe you will be the one to put me back together like some ******* teen novel
It's been ingrained into my mind that I will find my wonder wall
I called you my wonder wall because I wanted you to be the that saves me because I believe you'll be the one to save me
But you've built up walls
Walls that you don't realize are up
And I sit there carefully prying and knocking on the stone walls
and I'll hide when you start to back off
But maybe I'm the one with walls
Maybe it's me who is the black hole that ***** in the light and life and everything that ever made me smile
Maybe I'll **** you in and never let you out and destroy you like I have been time and time again
Maybe my rage will smash you like a beautiful vase and leave you to pick up the pieces
But I don't want that
I want you to tame my rage
And close my black hole of a heart
Let your warm touch calm my now cold heart
And I can hear wonder wall playing in the back of my head every time I see you
every time I kiss you
Every time I kiss you it's like another black hole
******* me in and pulling me apart like I'm made of thread and your nimble hands pulled the loose string
You sewed an undone seam on your hoodie
The hoodie I took from you and wear every single night dreaming that it's you engulfing me instead of this fabric
The fabric that makes me feel safe and stops my worries and paranoid rambling
Just like you
You with black holes for a soul and a warm heart that jumps when I touch you
You with the eyes that make me blush
You with the nimble fingers that glide across my body
You with lips oh god your lips
You who will never see this
You who will break me or save me
October 9, 2016 at 3:07am
  Oct 2017 Nightmare
Your hand leaves a warm trail up my thigh
Our hearts going too fast
"Do you feel safe do you feel safe do you feel safe"
Holding each other like we'll never see each other
I can not breath
All the air in my lungs have been given to you
Legs tangled in the sheets
Fingers in your hair
"I feel safe i feel safe i feel safe"
I can smell you on my shirt
I can taste you on my lips
I never want to let go
"Please dont go please dont go please dont go"
I wont let you go
I cant let you go
Dont let me go
November 11, 2016 at 11:30pm
  Oct 2017 Nightmare
I want calm mornings
I want to wake up on your chest and in your arms
For the morning light to wake me up
A smile on my face as i kiss your cheek and you slowly open your eyes to smile at me
The birds are a muffled song
A warmth in my chest I've never been able to explain
The bed creaks as we get up
The kitchen soon smells of coffee and orange juice
Maybe a cat maybe a dog with a tiny little silver  bell
The soft patter of feet on the hard wood floor
Our tooth brushes in a cup in the bathroom we share
Yours is blue and mine is red
Maybe ill help you pick a tie
Kisses every time we bump into each other as we get ready
Jingle of keys as we hurry out the door
Promises of coming home early and making plans for dinner
The door to our home is locked and waiting for pur return
November 22, 2016 at 11:51pm
Nightmare Jun 2017
I want to get lost in the forest
Away from all of my burdens
Away from all my worries
And feel free again
Nightmare Jun 2017
I write poems based on what's going on with me, past issues, current mental state, what's on my mind currently, and real life situations.

This is like my outlet
like people writing songs based on how they feel
or based on the stuff that has been happening.

Because of this, many of them are very personal.
Some are true, some are just a poem idea.
Can you tell which ones are real?
Can you tell which ones are base on what's been happening in my life?

Like a door way leading to my darkest secrets of my struggles.
I put myself here for you to judge
All true words, poem very unstructured. Just want to let you know about some things...
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