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I am the ghost of a teenage overdose
Poems
Huthaifa Abdul-Hakeem Mar 2015
Overdose
Huthaifa Abdul-Hakeem
Mar 2015
Part 1: "Why do I overdose" I overdose to get rid of the feeling I have for you, I overdose to make myself feel good, I overdose because of jealousy I see. "Why do I overdose" I overdose because no one loves me like you do so I overdose. I overdose because of the struggles I go throw. "Why do I overdose" please tell me. I overdose because all my life people come and go. "Why do I overdose."
Overdose
Turn Off The Lights Oct 2014
Life in a poem
Turn Off The Lights
Oct 2014
I am a fœtus
Swimming in darkness
Oblivious to the world around me
I am a new born
Opening my eyes for the first time
Taking my first breathe
Crying the first of many tears
Confused by my sight and the light around me
I am a toddler
Crawling my way across a universe made of shapes sounds colors
Overdose of senses
Too many things happening simultaneously I
Just stare around and try to make sense of this madness
I am a child
Taking my first step into childhood by standing upright
And walking around the world on my own two feet
It's the first of many steps
I will move forward to take over the world
With my eyes ears hands nose mouth
Overdose of senses
I am a teenager
Feeling my heart break for the first time
A broken friendship
A broken love
Deception in human kind
For the first time I wonder why
Why are we here?
If we suffer so much and so intensly
My heart breaks and I cry and I shake and I have no idea what is happening
Overdose of senses
I am a young adult
Wondering about the future for the very first time
Where I fit in
Will I fit in
How do I fit in
What will I do for the rest of my life?
Overdose of questions
I am an adult
Worrying about taxes and marriage and kids
I have settled down I have a career and I look back
On the days all the things that mattered were grades and friends
I am happy but is this the life I dreamed of?
Or did I settle for less than I wanted?
What would happen if I left it all now?
Overdose of questions
I am an old grandma
Relaxing eveyr morning with a cup of coffee
Next to the man who shared my life for so long
I look back on life and realize I am happy
I have made choices that lead me here and now I
Am happy
Overdose of emotions
I am a senile grandma
No one claims me anymore
I am in a care home where most people don't care
I am one of many and
I look back on my life everynight when the demons come and visit me
So I yell out in hopelessness and they sedate me
I am faced with loneliness and there are so many things I wish I had done
Overdose of emotions
Heart attack
No heartbeat
I am dead.
Swimming in darkness
Oblivious to the world around me
I am a new born
Opening my eyes for the first time
Taking my first breathe
Crying the first of many tears
Confused by my sight and the light around me
I am a toddler
Crawling my way across a universe made of shapes sounds colors
Overdose of senses
Too many things happening simultaneously I
Just stare around and try to make sense of this madness
I am a child
Taking my first step into childhood by standing upright
And walking around the world on my own two feet
It's the first of many steps
I will move forward to take over the world
With my eyes ears hands nose mouth
Overdose of senses
I am a teenager
Feeling my heart break for the first time
A broken friendship
A broken love
Deception in human kind
For the first time I wonder why
Why are we here?
If we suffer so much and so intensly
My heart breaks and I cry and I shake and I have no idea what is happening
Overdose of senses
I am a young adult
Wondering about the future for the very first time
Where I fit in
Will I fit in
How do I fit in
What will I do for the rest of my life?
Overdose of questions
I am an adult
Worrying about taxes and marriage and kids
I have settled down I have a career and I look back
On the days all the things that mattered were grades and friends
I am happy but is this the life I dreamed of?
Or did I settle for less than I wanted?
What would happen if I left it all now?
Overdose of questions
I am an old grandma
Relaxing eveyr morning with a cup of coffee
Next to the man who shared my life for so long
I look back on life and realize I am happy
I have made choices that lead me here and now I
Am happy
Overdose of emotions
I am a senile grandma
No one claims me anymore
I am in a care home where most people don't care
I am one of many and
I look back on my life everynight when the demons come and visit me
So I yell out in hopelessness and they sedate me
I am faced with loneliness and there are so many things I wish I had done
Overdose of emotions
Heart attack
No heartbeat
I am dead.
Armand-DeamoJC Aug 2018
Suicide; the answer
Armand-DeamoJC
Aug 2018
To all the goodbyes
I say goodnight
To everyone that dies
I hope it's bright
To everyone;
With a razor
Hand of pills
Tied rope
Dangling keys
Extreme height below
Finger over a light trigger
Electricity at hand
Open propane tank
Empty plate, with full glass
Stop, think about who you're leaving behind
I know my words aren't going to stop you, but just read
Did you bother to write and leave a note?
Is it worth it then?
Saying you're sorry, knowing you'll leave someone behind?
Stop. Think about why you're doing it
Do you have nobody?
Think about your opportunities that'll fly past
The chance of ever meeting someone?
Did you lose someone?
Think about if you'll actually see them again?
Being bullied?
Fight back, with whatever you have
Life shoved you down?
No, I'm not asking you to get up!
I'm telling you to get your *** into a nap
Think about all the possibilities that might not be
Think of all the opportunities and people in the future
Think of your legacy
Think of anything except the pain
Now balance the pain and everything else
Want to jump? Skyfall
Want to shoot? Paintball and games
Want to hang? Bungee
Want to overdose? Take 10% of it and party
Suffocate in propane gas, or blow up? Cook a nice meal, invite a friend or family. Surround yourself. No friends and family? Find a friend, build a family.
Want to speed wrong side of the road? Speed on the right side of the road and get carried with the wind, do it over again
Want to cut yourself? Cut off the pain and wrong influences
Electrocute yourself? Rather save electricity and watch a good movie with friends or family. Have none? Watch a movie alone, play a game online. Make friends, build a family
Want to starve yourself so you can get drunker and finally forget it all, when your liver gives in? Eat a lot more, blow off some steam at the gym and build a body that girls/guys would like, attract them and make new friends. Drink with friends.
I've tried many things, some of them didn't work out, or I couldn't stay awake longer. Create new dreams if the old ones died. Work hard for them. Achieve something
"At least leave a ******* legacy behind" is what my bestfriend, Steph used to say
"You can get out of this alive, but maybe a little ****** up, but anything damaged can be repaired" My bestfriend Josh used to say
"Life can carry you away without what you thought you needed" my bestfriend Divene used to say
Even more quotes from people I've lost in my life, so I ask you just think about it all
Still going through with it? Remember it's a one way ticket
I say goodnight
To everyone that dies
I hope it's bright
To everyone;
With a razor
Hand of pills
Tied rope
Dangling keys
Extreme height below
Finger over a light trigger
Electricity at hand
Open propane tank
Empty plate, with full glass
Stop, think about who you're leaving behind
I know my words aren't going to stop you, but just read
Did you bother to write and leave a note?
Is it worth it then?
Saying you're sorry, knowing you'll leave someone behind?
Stop. Think about why you're doing it
Do you have nobody?
Think about your opportunities that'll fly past
The chance of ever meeting someone?
Did you lose someone?
Think about if you'll actually see them again?
Being bullied?
Fight back, with whatever you have
Life shoved you down?
No, I'm not asking you to get up!
I'm telling you to get your *** into a nap
Think about all the possibilities that might not be
Think of all the opportunities and people in the future
Think of your legacy
Think of anything except the pain
Now balance the pain and everything else
Want to jump? Skyfall
Want to shoot? Paintball and games
Want to hang? Bungee
Want to overdose? Take 10% of it and party
Suffocate in propane gas, or blow up? Cook a nice meal, invite a friend or family. Surround yourself. No friends and family? Find a friend, build a family.
Want to speed wrong side of the road? Speed on the right side of the road and get carried with the wind, do it over again
Want to cut yourself? Cut off the pain and wrong influences
Electrocute yourself? Rather save electricity and watch a good movie with friends or family. Have none? Watch a movie alone, play a game online. Make friends, build a family
Want to starve yourself so you can get drunker and finally forget it all, when your liver gives in? Eat a lot more, blow off some steam at the gym and build a body that girls/guys would like, attract them and make new friends. Drink with friends.
I've tried many things, some of them didn't work out, or I couldn't stay awake longer. Create new dreams if the old ones died. Work hard for them. Achieve something
"At least leave a ******* legacy behind" is what my bestfriend, Steph used to say
"You can get out of this alive, but maybe a little ****** up, but anything damaged can be repaired" My bestfriend Josh used to say
"Life can carry you away without what you thought you needed" my bestfriend Divene used to say
Even more quotes from people I've lost in my life, so I ask you just think about it all
Still going through with it? Remember it's a one way ticket
I'm suicidal myself. Been for a long time. Just speak to me. Speak to someone. Let's fix this ****.
You deserve to live. Thank you for 50k views
You deserve to live. Thank you for 50k views