Ruffled,
Just like life,
Always a mess.
A pleasant mess

Eyes like the moon,
The light reflected off of
Its surface
Always reaching my eyes
When the world allows.
And the light of the moon
At night
Is possibly the most pleasant
Had I had the chance...

And the darkness
Always evident,
Because, void of light,
The moon still exists
And the veil of emptiness
Speaks volumes.

A mess partly smoothed
Down
Is still a mess;
Why not just
Throw your head back
Into the wind like usual?

Another person to thank,
Thank you
For making me smile.
Thank you
Really
For the genuine gazes.
That's all I need.

What have you done to me
The things you've done
Back and forth
You mess with my mind
I'm close to insanity
What kind of love
Take you brain
And switches it
With your heart

I have a pain in my legs, and my right foot
I can't tell if it's from running,
being tense all the time,
or if it's growing pains

I have a sore throat
It hurts to swallow
You know, it's summer
But I think I'm catching a cold

I have a bruise on my head
A patch of hair missing the size of the nickle
I think it's from when I (accidentally)
Ran headfirst into a wall

I have an ache in my heart
A hole in my brain
I can't tell if it's from thinking too much
Or feeling too much
It's all the same

I’m not ok
And I’m done letting that break my heart.
I’m going to forgive myself first this time.
I’m not going to add my disappointment to my situation.
I don’t want to add lightning to dark skies anymore.

And some days it’s ok to put makeup over it and dance.

And I will not let anyone make me feel bad about it.
About being pretty and broken.
About having a big heart but not enough to keep the beating steady.
About wanting your lips as clean up of this mess.
And your hands for grounding.
For needing the sun and coffee just as much as the moon and my pen.
About smiling and breaking at the same time.
About breathing and coming back together at the hands of myself again.