There was a sign; my body felt it.
I know that it says something.
But I don't know what that means.

I don't know where to go.
I cannot know it.

But I know that I need to stand up now.
It is certain.

And I know that another sign will come.
So that I can approach more to somewhere.

Yes, I know that, as I have known it.

it scares me to know that you keep things from me. that there are things you don't say. because if you can lie and say you're fine then how do i know you aren't lying when you say you love me? how can i trust that anything you say is real if you can't even say the things that are hurting you inside. whats worse is that you tell him. yes, i have done my own share of such things, but all of that is just physical, it doesn't mean anything. why can you not just talk to me? just, say what it is and i will listen. i may not understand but i will hear what you have to say.

but what you should really know is that i will always be honest with you. because when i start lying to you, i won't know what lies i've told myself

you should also know that i will always love you. even if we separate and bridges burn, you have made your mark and like it or not you will be in my heart forever.

or
if you do change (inside or out) no matter what i will love you. not your clothes or the things you do, but you. changing yourself can't change the way i feel right now.

and things aren't perfect, they probably never will be.
and i told myself i wouldn't do this.
i told myself that you needed to work things out on your own
but i keep telling myself that if i just shove things at you eventually you will understand that i care about you. that you'll forget whatever it is that you can't tell me and just see me and see that i love you but im starting to feel like you never will. if you can just stop making things your fault, stop making things big and bad and just let them be what they are.

The moment felt your lips on mine again
Footsteps on my heart
Wings filled not only my stomach
Fluttered through each part

Even being apart for months
Still run back to your embrace
Beginning to wonder if we truly love
Or just love the chase

I have given all I had before
Won't do the same thing twice
Took until there was nothing left
Inside my heart but butterflies and ice

**** violent urges
Heaven's gate in your smile
Hook with fleeting surges of warmth
Through frozen veins for miles

No one able to light up my body like you
The way winding happiness spreads throughout
Like wildfire with one single touch
Burning hesitation in my core along with doubt

I do not know why I let you back into my life
Into every tissue and cell
Thought that I was free from your control
Rooted too deeply to completely expel

i am a bad poet
because i do not truly know
how to feel anything

and every metaphor before and after this
are desperate attempts to feel something more

I know that I am alone..
You know that I am alone..
That's why I need you to be here..
Hold my hand and lend me your back..
It's enough..

I need to be calm and not have a lot of thoughts..
or it will get worse..

Until the day that I really need someone beside me..
That day I will not allow anyone to accompany me except you..
You are really mean, if you not come..

What a quaint turn of phrase
To describe my malaise
tis an accurate way to frame it.

To excrete or not see
Not a fun way to be
And no one upon which to blame it.

Is life often this way?
Nothing good either way?
Just a sad choice of what’s bad or worse?

Is this all we’ve got?
The noose or a shot?
And is this life naught but a curse?

I’d like to believe
We weren’t meant to just grieve
That a future with joy lies ahead?

Not just **** and blindness
But some hope and kindness
Something nice before I notice I’m dead!

Perhaps my reward
Is meant to be scored
Just after my untimely demise?

In which case I must say
I’ll begin right away
My quite excellent will to revise.