You said you'd be there
You said that you loved me
You said you would never hit me
But then you pulled off the mask.

Mr. Know It All
You don't know anything at all
You saw what they did to me
I begged to be free
My hands were tied
My eyes were wide
Your pride urged you to lie
I was pleading for the key
Now there's nothing left of me

Dark clouds fill the sky
I couldn't see anything
And I especially couldn't think  
I didn't know what to do
They were dark and gloomy days
We were together then
But you always made my day
You gave me a hug then a kiss
You said I smelled like coffee
Because I did

But I was the one afraid
You were the one with confidence
You said you loved me
But it was all a lie

After a while
You started saying I love you
But in reality I never said it back
I always thought that
Is that bad?

I started to lay there
Thinking my own thoughts
On how this could've happened
I just lay there thinking
Most of the time it's sad
The others times I'm crying
Or I'm just thinking

All of those nights that
I lay there thinking
It's because of you
You knew that I did this
But you didn't know it was about you
I'm sorry I kept this
But it was true

As the light begins to fade,
Children begin to close their eyes.
We start to see a make believe,
An illusion of the mind.
As we slip into a dream,
We sence something not right.
We quickly wake up to a sight of a dark And gloomy room.
We close our eyes just one more time.
We think all night and to our suprise,
A dream is life in disguise.

Someday, we shall die and burn,
Like we do everyday

The day so bright,
but i am feeling clouded,
gloomy is the area that surrounds me.
Uncomfortable in my own self,
i feel so confused,
lost,
misunderstood,
afraid,
but i smile through out the day,
proud of my achievments,
but my efforts are not admired,
a day so bright,
i am lost in its darkness,
who am i?
What am i?
I do not know,
but all in all failure strikes

this life 
and that love will always hurt
last night,

i anxiously desired to feel your skin 

once i felt you graze my back 
all the passion filled me again.

these walls you built 
are becoming increasingly aggressive

i want you 
but if this is the cost

long term it is too much
you wouldn’t understand

but i know whats wrong, 

it’s not your face 

it’s not your personality

it’s not your kind eyes

i want 
to be loved 

i was at one point 

but it left me too wrecked, unfixable.
baby you’re incredible

you should never lose 
the love you are capable of giving


i just don’t believe 

i don’t’ want to &
drugs are predictable 

i know she will never change

you see you, are unpredictable

whether you love me today 

doesnt mean you will tomorrow
i have found the love i am capable of being with

now go and find somebody who loves you

our skies appear to be so gloomy
like they're always going to turn into a storm
a storm that will swipe the hopeless thoughts away
i used to look at life differently
i used to not look at life at all
but now i see clearly
the splattered like paint that are our eyes and clouds
the merged shapes and lines that are our houses and anatomies
i know now that all this will pass by like a blur
like it always does
my father tries to spend as much time with my little brothers
when i refuse to, he says
when they've grown up, i'll miss their little selves
oh, i can't guarantee i will
but i do think that he does this
because i've grown up
and he's left to miss my little self
because the people i don't recognize at reunions always tell me how big i am now
and he smiles the same smile every time at them that they seem to understand
and then he shoots me a very different one i've yet to understand

Those November days I ought to know so well;
How they might often pass like a quick breathe,
Amidst you at once, and soon leaving nothing left.

The puddles after storms would emerge standing swamps;
And the cloudy sky would cast a constant haze.
Around, silently, life would go on, for countless days.

My journal would saturate like that of one
A bard weeping who had cried upon
           Just a mild tune to cast a moment away.

It hit like chronic to the lungs, sharp,  blissful pain. Reality My daily dose, chalk full of excitement, pleasure, and vigorous torture.  
I am defeated. I am shattered.
My head plays like a grimy ***** with bad shots. My affection is a void of self loathing and set on fire by pity.
The smile I use masks the pain of my true self, for the most troublesome people, bring the most joy to the world, for if they cannot be happy at least the others around them can. I will not apologize for whom iv become. No one has apologized for making me this why.