im hiding in all the places i promised you i would never go again
im singing the lullabys that remind me of old friends
but mostly just you
and your face, that was never blue
only on two occasions i had to see you cry
and i held you lovingly, promising i would never say goodbye
i guess i lied.
that's exactly what i did
im not going to fib
ripping out another rib as the days drag by
slowly, miserably, never by surprise

My heart stopped,
I couldn't breath,
I started bleeding
from my mouth,
I had a seizure.
In that time
I accepted death
then I woke up
****** up.

Everyone trying to explain
                I try but can i afford to?
                  Leaving for good , in ink


Wait a minute
Is this even legal?
Money baths
Coke plates
Romance
From royalties?
Surroundings
Heroes , ******
Introscopics
All the same
Saying-*******
I love you.


                         I know what it lookslike
                       Cliches and cheap flowers
                       Conversations gone cold
                        Some of you haven't met
                         I just wanted something
                      That was meant to happen
          Everything pure gets ****** in
The end

Little baby, I heard you're coming
I wish I was excited, delighted to meet you,
but I am not.

Maybe if your dad wasn't a felon from a bad family
and your mom wasn't an uneducated hippy.
If only they had their life together and it was a whole different situation.

I have no choice but to accept it, to accept you.
Sorry, but I am not thrilled.

This really kills because you are holding her back.
Back from her dreams.
I know this sounds mean, but listen up.
If she has you, you are going to absolutely **** her life up.

Little baby girl, I can call you that because I found out your gender today.
I wish I was excited to find out.
If this was a normal situation I would be happy, but it is not.
But because of you, I am going to have to deal with your **** up of a father for the next 18 years and probably more...

Seriously baby. I kinda hate you...but I love you at the same time.
This is a weird situation.

I worry about you and your future...
I wish that I could take you away the second you are born,
hide you away in a tower, but I don't have that power.
You aren't mine, it's not my right.
Your life is going to be a crazy ride, hold on tight.

You are going to grow up around some really messed up people,
I am worried that they will hurt you.. If they do, I'll **** them.
Every ******* one, super slowly and torture them.
Please be careful little girl.

So, little baby girl...
This is what I am hoping:
You will be born, healthy and pink.
Your mom will leave your dad.
You both will come and live with me.
That would be quite nice, I think.
Your mom will marry some awesome dude that has a career.
A new, wonderful side of your mom will appear.
You will be happy and have the childhood we didn't.
The childhood that we couldn't...

I am sorry.
I am so so sorry.

I know you are not born yet, but I want you to know, that I am here.
I am here for you.
If you ever need a taste of a normal life, come and visit.
Come and stay.
I love you little baby girl and I am sorry.
I am so so sorry.

In a trance, slashing throats. I'm in a killer mood someone's going to pay for this. All this betray and backstabbing. Pleasure by seeing other people suffering. Stressed out, messed up, ****** up. Killing every living thing as I walk by. Tonight you're all going to pay. Tonight is the end. **Suffer!