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neth jones Jul 11
reminded of my hurt youth
             that never did quell

reprimand the cowardly self

should have sought
    correction from the harm
                that stoppered me

but i was too embarrassed
            to be met in therapy
Anais Vionet Apr 21
My freshman year is ending and I’m as busy as a one-armed juggler. Of course covid is back. It reoccurs at the worst times, like a movie slasher long thought dead.

When we have something scheduled very early in the morning, we call it an “early-burn.”  This one early-burn morning I had a 7am meeting. Peter and I had met for breakfast because he’s back in my life and he’s ALWAYS up and out early.

It was snowing and we were hurrying, because somehow, I always cut things close. I think I tripped over my shoe-string on a patch of ice. I went down hard and I heard this loud ripping sound. I’d ripped my pants badly and my book bag spilled too. I’m scrambling around on the ground in an attempt to grab some loose papers the wind was scattering.

Peter says, “Wow, your ******* are really thin.”

I jump up “I feel you don’t know where our boundaries are,” I laugh, “you’re so nasty - don’t just stand there grinning - HELP me!” I indicate two papers for him to chase. I looked to see how bad the rip was (BAD). Of course, my coat was short that day, so I untucked my blouse. “How does this look?” I asked Peter.
“That works,” he said, giving my fix his imprimatur.

The two of us managed to corral the papers. “Let’s pretend that didn’t happen,” Peter said. I realized I’d ripped my pants leg and scraped my knee badly - it was bleeding profusely.
“******* It!” I went off.

This lady comes up - seemingly out of nowhere - this old white Christian lady who we’d never seen before. She was so out of place and random and she says, “I really don’t think you should be talking like that in public.” She wasn’t harsh.

At that moment, a gust of wind came up that made me lower my head, as though I couldn’t look the old woman in the eyes but I was just ignoring her anyway - having my own set of issues to deal with.

She had a point though. I’m cursing too much these days. I feel like If I admit it, maybe it’s ok but I am trying not to cuss anymore - well less maybe - at least in a negative way.  
“I think you look fu-kin’ GREAT,” would still be acceptable.
BLT Merriam Webster word of the day challenge:: imprimatur: an official approval
Sombro Oct 2021
The first x on paper
The first glint of gold
The first step to success
Raven Feels Jul 2021
DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, who wants to count to ten when you can carry on to infinity?

she stopped time and asked
a question planted silence in advance
faced my truth on a real talk
never thought it was hard to stand or walk

rock plays numb humiliation
the inhale echoes wounds then exhalation
denial and defense
tears welled up the hidden immense

the wind swings
a lost count to infinity sings
red eyes
step on two legs cries and undeniable disguise

forbidden was for me to
reveal the vulnerable due
the intimidated call
of how things are messed up in sort to fall

and now I think
of how it stinks
memories of misery
a step between me and the cemetery

embarrassment attacks
white lies painted above the blacks
stepped on me
a bug under the shoe and I let it be

guess that she knew
but the answer hung in air and flew
my confidence buried peacefully when already dead
and the winter cold shivers in my head

Anais Vionet Jun 2020
Dear careless whisperer,
Some sharings are dagger-edged
and there is no escape when they’re turned on you
no countermagic for the soul crushing embarrassment
dropped as if from a great height.
Did you hear the gun-shot thunderclap of confidence
leaving the room?
I am a careless whisperer
Winter Sparrow Dec 2019
Hot Chocolate and Sweets.
A Tigers Eye and candles.
A sweet memory
Of heartbreak.

The last goodbye,
Brought no urges to end.
Not to I at least.
Not to you I hope.

I slithered around your neck like a serpent.
I adored it as if it was prey.
A vampires next meal.
My final taste of you.

Your lips are forbidden fruit.
But i climbed the tree.
I teased the apple.
But the forbidden fruit stayed untouched.

For a second i touched the apple.
For a second you almost fell.
I love your strength.
But I hate that I appreciate it.

Ill never forget that Eve.
The Eve of the Ghost.
The Ghost that could have been us.
But who am I?

A thief?
A madman?
A lost cause?
An embarrassment?
Laokos Sep 2019
these words
powerful as an enemy
as loving as
no woman
no woman
no woman
no woman
no explanation
no arms
no legs
no lips
no hands
no one
now just
one beer and a hit
is all i need
to forget about my
to forget about my
blundering , blubbering past self
weak and desperate for
embarrassment shadow
The uniVerse Oct 2016
A girl stood before me at the supermarket
a few random items littered her basket
pink socks poked out from her sneakers
they were covered with little creatures
an inch of flesh stood between
those ankle high socks and her jeans.

Nice socks I exclaimed!
she turned around inflamed
looked at me and said
I have a boyfriend
her face now red.

Are they his I asked?
her face broke into a laugh
sorry I got so defensive
guys make me apprehensive
I don't really have a boyfriend
sometimes I just like to pretend.

*I know how you feel I replied
in embarrassment I've often lied
and whenever I'm struck by beauty
of someone new I meet
I can't look directly at them
I look towards their feet.
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