I sit cold,
Confused
as to how that can be,
because I have you
seated beside me.

But you are
Drained
of the warmth
I once called
home.

It’s like everyone around me can’t see my pain, it’s like there is something wrong with my brain.
I’m feeling really drained, I think that I might go insane...how could I restrain?
My chest is really heavy and my head is feeling wavy, I cannot keep steady.
Where is my self control? I’m feeling completely un-hole.
Something has taken over my soul and I have lost all control.
I feel so hopeless, I don’t think that I can cope with this.

Endless unknown thoughts piercing
my empty soul,
Pure unexplainable thoughts controlled my soul,

I will never save my soul,
i feel like drained by unexplainable thoughts, Yes im happy but why?

I'm looking for something that I'm not sure if it's exist in this realm.
My body imprisoned of this thoughts

I'm so drained
I can barely lift my fingers
To press these keys
Yet it's key
That I get this message out
A message about
How tired I am

Each breath of solitude is an escape from the chaos that is you. Each moment in your presence is like being stuck on the edge of the tide as wave after wave hits me from all directions; battering my body and my spirit.

Your constant demands on my time - my emotions and empathy - exhaust my will and my motivation. I long for the harbor of peace, in the storm that is you.

Yet each time you call out for me; I race willingly to your side. I give you my everything knowing that you will take it without remorse or thankfulness in your heart.

I give you my love in the hope that one day someone on this earth will think me worthy of the same.

29OCT2019