two worlds within me
one rule-abiding
and the other rule-smashing

how do they coexist
in a world of culture
and tradition

if I choose for myself
i’m selfish and
irresponsible

if I follow the rules
then I won’t be living
authentically

recent conversations
have made me hold a mirror
to myself

wondering again
how do I bring these two worlds
together

I just want to live
my truth without hurting
anyone.

Just clear rejection is the fact of disinterest or integrity falling in pieces
Discomfort building in no more comfortable silences
Or paraphernalia of glances loosing it's eccentricity
Here we stand alone and no longer want to indulge in favors
Growing cold and abandoning what we savoured
Here we stand alone no longer want to clarify our choices
Whatever we'll say sounds foist
This weather is turning sad and so is our love
Disinterest building from distance or from lack of trust
It's fermenting with ignorance, leading sour roots
Day by day growing
And filling our lack of pursuit

War in the womb
Your death or mine 
****** if not kept 
Suicide if it is 
Either way
Agony

corona
   naked
    dilemma
         malady
             dying

Apart from her eyes,
She adorned my heart with her smiles.
We both started dilly-dallying
until our eyes meet again,
She wants me to accept its her reign.
A few snobbish glance of hers,
Push me through the dilemma;
Whether to talk her or not.
And that urge inside me keeps on growing,
but I couldn't find a window
to let my thoughts flowing.
It seems like I had a lot of time and
She's in no hurry;
yet I failed to initiate a conversation.
I was completely chapfallen,
but the words never came out.

Someone please
just tell me the answer
because what I thought was a crossroads
has branched into a dozen paths
and you know I don't stand a chance
against a decision-making dilemma
so I am handing over the strings
please just play me like a puppet
put the confidence in my choice
put the words into my voice
move my feet in some direction
I promise I'll have no objection
because I cannot think! I cannot act!
my mind is chock-full
and completely jam-packed
and I am indecisive to the extreme
so much so I'm about to scream
yes I know it's bad that I have no thought
but all my attempts are tangled in a knot
I am tired of the pros and cons list
I am getting lost on this track of twists
so take my choices, I do not care
it's not like I'm getting anywhere!

The poets are all just lost finding words.
And when they corner something’s essence,
A glimmer of truth or a scratch at the profound,
Does not all but a measly tuft of hair escape their page?