Sanctimonious priests and their **** Biretta hats.
Tell me of me of gods praise and a world in its hard collapse.
Where were you when I needed you.
Breaking hearts I suppose.

Wilderness and forests breach out across the hills.
Sunshine and rainbows will bless our day begin.
But I'm not watching anymore.
There's no need to get preachy.

And I reek of desperation for another mans touch.
And there's none to hear me scream I've got a pretty good hunch.
Do you even seem to care?
It's not very nice over here.

Harbor buses ship Asian businessmen back over gentle seas.
The city is alive against the saintly laden breeze.
I reach out to the stars.
They turn away and blush.

And I'll be ****** if I ever admit its not you its me.
And I'll keep up this facade, I'm over here and I'm free.
My body wanes past the flowers.
Their beauty turns to coal.

The hour was late, and
soon to be later.
The minutes devoured the seconds.
Leisure was my antidote to a long day's madness.
Then I found her, or she found me.
She cast a spell on me in the witching hour.
Her gaze was possessive of me.
Premonition was her touch.

I know not how she crossed the room.
What mattered is she was in my lap. Summoned.
Yet, was it I who lingered, nose at heel?
You can't question the magic.
We are the agents of fate;
we are deciding and directed.

I could never be a marksman.
I wanted her to kiss me: I talked about our parents.
I wanted to dance with her: I romanced the weather.
I wanted a way to reach her: I reach for her thighs.
Oh, how we all wish the target would welcome the bullet,
and to my surprise, she welcomes.
My defences evaporate into the smoke-filled air.
I take her hand. The edge of her lip curves.
That's all she wrote.

Sometimes, complexity is a burden, and simplicity is freedom.

A lifetime of unrequited passion was distilled in that night for us both.
We danced in controlled chaos: not knowing our bodies, yet fully aware.
Time ticked backwards and forgot to tock.
I lost my tie, she lost her sock.
Giggles, the sign of a fermented joy.
The joy of not knowing joy, true joy, and then having it.

It was love... wasn't it?
Yes, it was. It was not mature, sure, but it was. We knew it.
We sheltered ourselves from the world.
Time ticked forward and tocked with abandon.
I remember moments holding her, sharing in her warmth as she shared in mine. A communion for two.

I remember rings exchanged.
I remember the first fruit of her labor. Our labor.
A hand so small it felt like a stick shift.
Time ticked forward and, then

Silence.
I don't know when we stopped talking,
but she was gone.

My tears, some semblance of oceans forgotten, dotted the clothes of my baby rocking in my trembling arms.
It seemed pain was my daily meal.
I faced questions I never considered possible:
Will she ever come back?
Will I ever love again?
What if I can't love again?
What if I feel this pain forever?
...
What if she's dead?

Our life replayed like waves lapping the shore in my distant mind:
How the upbeat jazz descended to slow rock tunes.
"Oh babeh, your lipstick kiss is foreva, it's the red rose ova my grave!"
Our cyclical steps matching, lighting fires in our hearts.
Our arms coiled around one another, as if we were falling from some hallowed place... falling in love is scary.

We try to smile and remember the madness when we're sober.

We forget the things that are important sometimes... all the time.
We forget so much that we become these chewed up, gnarled bits of humanity, searching for our souls when they are right inside us. Incomplete, sure, but there all along.
We have that hollow wanting.
That grinding hunger, that hot thirst.
I don't know the cure for certain, but, the memories seem to know.

Let's stop searching for happiness. That's like searching for flight. What we need is the wings. It's not youth, it's not money. It's opportunity. It's innocence: the belief that things are simple, because they are.

Innocence led me to Rosie that night.
Compromise in the face of difficulty stole me away.

It was years later that I remembered the pain.
Laura got off the school bus angry.
"Boys."
When I got to the bottom of it, she was in the wrong.
She dumped him... for nothing. Because she could.

Waves of despair bubbled up from beneath my present: the calling of the past.
I almost strayed from my resolutions.

I was left with the thought, "She's just like her mother,"
but I left that thought forlorn,
because the truth is, I raised Laura,
and so,
maybe I'm the demon calling the angels sick.

Maybe we're all demons.
It makes sense. We all feel we've fallen from grace.
The devil you know smiles from the mirror,
it wears your face and crowns you king or crud...

Starve it to death, hang it on your sterling bow and
sail for the waking dawn.

You may ask the question, "How can anyone really know 100% sure that they are going to heaven when they die?" The answer is found in the Scriptures. Here we will not look at what man has to say, but what God says in the Bible. Remember, if what man or religion teaches is contrary to God’s Word - God’s Word is always right over man’s word.

YOU CAN KNOW FOR SURE:
I Jn 5:12-13...
“He that hath the Son hath life; and he that hath not the Son of God hath not life. These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.”

According to God’s Word one can know that he or she has eternal life. In order to have this settled one must realize Salvation is only through Christ.
SALVATION IS ONLY THROUGH JESUS CHRIST ALONE:

Acts 4:12...
“Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.”
John 14:6...
“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.”

Many have been taught salvation is either through church membership, baptism, good works, or taking the sacrament. Most religions teach living a good life is required for one’s salvation.


YOU CAN NOT WORK YOUR WAY TO HEAVEN:

Eph 2:8-9...
“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.”...
Titus 3:5...
“Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost;”
Gal 2:16...
“Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified.”
Gal 3:10-11...
“For as many as are of the works of the law are under the curse: for it is written, Cursed is every one that continueth not in all things which are written in the book of the law to do them. But that no man is justified by the law in the sight of God, it is evident: for, The just shall live by faith.”
Gal 3:24...
“Wherefore the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ, that we might be justified by faith.”
Rom 3:20...
" Therefore by the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight: for by the law is the knowledge of sin".Understand, one can be sincere about their beliefs yet wrong. If you were sick and someone gave you poison to take instead of a medicine remedy; it doesn’t matter how sincere you are about taking what you believe to be medicine - if it is poison, you are in trouble.
Prov 14:12...
“There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.”

God’s Word makes it plain that the gift of salvation is only through Jesus and is by grace, not by doing good things.

According to the Scriptures, to once and for all settle in your heart that you are going to heaven.

THERE ARE A FEW THINGS THAT YOU MUST UNDERSTAND:


1. Why We Need a Saviour? WE ARE ALL SINNERS.

Rom 3:23...
"For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;"
Rom 5:12...
"Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:"
Rom 3:19...
"Now we know that what things soever the law saith, it saith to them who are under the law: that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God."
James 2:10...
"For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

Unless you admit you are a sinner; you will never see the real need for the Saviour. If we could get to heaven by our good works, why did Christ have to suffer such agony on the Cross?


2. If we die without Christ as our Saviour there is a penalty of eternal punishment in Hell.

Rev 21:8...
"But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death."
Rev 20:14-15...
"And death and hell were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death. And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire."


3. Christ paid the penalty for our sin. We MUST receive Him as our personal Lord and Saviour.

Isa 53:6...
"All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all."
Gal 3:13...
"Christ hath redeemed us from the curse of the law, being made a curse for us: for it is written, Cursed is every one that hangeth on a tree:"
Rom 5:8...
"But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
John 3:16...
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

4. Receive Christ as your Saviour.


In conclusion:
If you have already admitted you are a sinner and according to the Bible deserve to go to hell and if you believe with your heart that Christ died for your sins and arose from the grave the third day...
YOU MUST PERSONALLY BY FAITH RECEIVE CHRIST AS YOUR SAVIOUR!

Rom 10:9-109...
"That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation."

Right now after reading these Scriptures if you would simply bow your head and call upon the name of the Lord He will save you and give you eternal life. Remember, it is not just believing. Satan believes in God but that certainly doesn’t mean that he is going to heaven.

Rom 10:13...
"For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
John 1:12...
"But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name:"

Your Salvation is your own personal choice now. You can either RECEIVE CHRIST or REJECT HIM. It is up to you. Salvation is determined by what you do with Christ.

If wanna say sinners prayer and be saved in Jesus especially since the way the world's going and prophecies are happening every which way , christ is calling his bride soon bride meaning the church. Wanna accept Jesus Christ as Lord an Savior also known as Yeshua ha'mashiach means- Jesus the Messiah in hebrew. Many don't know either the word Yeshua means salvation in hebrew amazingly. If want to accept christ simply bow your head pray these words close eyes go somewhere quiet bedroom! Or closet somewhere with peace and quiet.
Pray these words it's a small sinners prayer.

Close eyes
We pray to God Yahweh also called elohim or Jehovah is the name of God!
Close eyes
Say this-


Dear God in heaven, I come to you in the name of Jesus. I acknowledge to You that I am a sinner, and I am sorry for my sins and the life that I have lived; I need your forgiveness.

I believe that your only begotten Son Jesus Christ shed His precious blood on the cross at Calvary and died for my sins, and I am now willing to turn from my sin.

You said in Your Holy Word, Romans 10:9 that if we confess the Lord our God and believe in our hearts that God raised Jesus from the dead, we shall be saved.

Right now I confess Jesus as the Lord of my soul. With my heart, I believe that God raised Jesus from the dead. This very moment I accept Jesus Christ as my own personal Savior and according to His Word, right now I am saved.

Thank you Jesus for your unlimited grace which has saved me from my sins. I thank you Jesus that your grace never leads to license, but rather it always leads to repentance. Therefore Lord Jesus transform my life so that I may bring glory and honor to you alone and not to myself.

Thank you Jesus for dying for me and giving me eternal life.
In Jesus name I pray amen!!!!!

Read rest below asap;

Don't worry about me, I'll be fine
I'll figure it all out in due time

I'll hide my pain behind my smile
Even if I have to struggle for a while

Am I a misguided fool
Hell bent on breaking every rule?

Do you see me as I am?
The one trying to take a stand

Trying steadily in vain
To circumvent all of the pain

If you were to ask me if it's all been worth it
I would shrug it off because it's not over yet

It's amazing how what is stored in your brain
Fills you with so much shame

Can you find a way out of this game
Or will you forever be bogged down by pain

Each day when I wake
I steady myself to challenge my fate

I've never asked for perfection
I only sought an end to the deception

The devil doesn't always appear with a red cape and horns.
Sometimes he is beautiful.
Like a fallen angel
because he is
and he was gods favorite...