Worn dull, tired of lab grown
language stone carved
The way that can happen
Not just the obvious sonant brutality
acid bare knuckles
Other words, shaped for obscurity
slide
ar o u nd and a ro un d and
a r o u n d and
Skirting certain description
hiding behind
Below
like earth, unlike earth
unverified, unburied, not bare

The night has come
So the phase has shift
And in the moonlight
I feel myself drift
Out from my head
Deeper I go
Till I am out.

In our Lifetime
They come and go
You'll never see them coming
You never expect them go

Sometimes they come with a lesson
But sometimes with a heartbreak
One thing we should know early on
It's never wrong to prioritize one's sake

It took 7 dates,
But it was worth the wait.

When it finally happened
I could have sworn
that I saw explosions from
synapses firing beneath
the surface of her
bewildered
eyes;

My lips brushed
against
hers,
pressed tightly,
then
narrowly withdrew.
Incense
tangy & alluring,
smothered the air
between us.
I could not breathe!
I did not need to.

“Take off your sandals,”
She said.
“Feel holy with me.”

The thunder of trumpets rattled the red sea of blood in my arteries.
A chorus of shouting thoughts compelled me closer to her.
I laid a hand on her cheek, & stroked the contour
of her torso with the other. I felt us trembling,
but in my arms the gentle ripples
from her skin dissipated & I
Drifted into calm.
Our walls had collapsed,
& in the clearing beyond the rubble
& melted silk heartstrings,
I found promised lands.

I want to come out.
I want to walk out and slam the door behind me
with whatever variation of a rainbow flag
billowing in the wind as I walk past.

I want to be out.
I want to be me and do so shamelessly
without fear of judgement or dislike
from people who may disagree

I wish I was out.
But I don't even know what I am
I want be yours and yours alone,
but there's no flag for that

I wish I was yours...
you have my mind and body and soul
but I'm just here on the side,
because you are still hers.

I can't imagine anything else
It feels pointless to try
I was given this
Whatever it is
Everything it is
Painful, scary, heartbreaking
Sometimes beautiful
Beautiful enough to keep me here

Continue,
Continue

There might be more
Something good
Holding out for magic
Things I felt when I was young
Before reality was cement
It feels like lifetimes ago
Ancient pain
Ancient fear and guilt and shame
I can't distinguish now from then
I am wrapped up in it
Trapped by it and caged by it
Changed by it
Chained to it
Is living truly to suffer
I see that now

Continue,
Continue