I am a distract yourself from the problem instead of facing things kind of person
I am a ‘the problem’ doesn’t exist unless you think about it person
I am a scared to be alone with their thoughts kind of person
I am the maybe it will just go away kind of person
I am the we can deal with it all another day kind of person
But the lie awake at night not being able to think of anything else kind of person
I am afraid to cry
Afraid to feel
Afraid to tell anyone anything that might make me slightly vulnerable
I can’t procrastinate but I can’t do it right now kind of person
I am the think of all the people you will disappoint kind of person
I am the kind of person where you think about me and realise you actually know nothing about who I am
My secrets
My dreams
My aspirations
I am the don’t tell anyone otherwise you’ll jinx it kind of person
I am the obsessive
I am kind (out loud)
I have emotions that are far to complex to verbalise or comprehend
My weakness is caring
My weakness is not wanting to upset anyone
And I know that sounds like a strength but it internally destroys me when someone says something wrong and I physically can’t open my mouth to verbally respond
And I try my best but its when I’m alone with my thoughts it hurts the most
When I realise there is no podcast, no movie, no Tv show or book to distract me from the inevitable
And you’re probably wondering what the inevitable is
But I don’t know

And that’s what scares me
That’s what keeps me up at night
Maybe a fear of failure
Maybe a build up of all those thoughts I’ve procrastinated thinking about
Maybe all those tears I should probably cry
But I can’t
No because then I’m weak
No because then someone can manipulate me
No because then I show that I’m not strong 100% of the time.
Even when I’m alone
And I don’t know why because I think people that can cry are brave I see their vulnerability as a strength because only the toughest don’t care what people think of them even at their weakest.
Plus crying is beautiful
And feeling is too
Because sadness hurts but happiness is ecstasy
And you can’t truly feel one without feeling the other
I am the fix your problems yourself kind of person
I am the don’t be a liability kind of person
I am the don’t weigh people down with your thoughts kind of person  
I have no idea but every idea of who I am as a person

An excerpt from a fairytale:

“You found what you needed from some token of love. Happiness lived at the end of bridges crossed and burned. You swim into an abyss of     oblivion and build a home in a sea of happily ever afters no one has dared to travel past.”

An excerpt from reality:

“What you needed, found you. You spend your days walking across broken bridges, mending what’s left of them and staring out at the horizon. Where the distant sun, ever so close, kisses your skin, and you are where you’re meant to be, manifesting the energy of healing.”

i don’t know how to explain it
but will try...
i can’t be the person you want me to be
/don't be blind/
i can’t rise up to this challenge
i can’t change
how things are right now
how everything's going
/it's snowing
inside/

all right
i just want to be crystal clear
everything's going to disappear
anytime soon

look at the moon
you will find the light at the end of this
let's share the very last kiss
then tap "erase all the past"
and trust

you have the key
to unlock whatever you need
but not with me
not with me

i can not face this connection
/wrong direction/
just wipe my number, come on!
from now on
i'll go my personal way
and you would need to find your path

anyway...

You are easy to love
You make time for me
You are generous with your affection
You communicate your feelings for me without hesitation
You openly and honestly share your thoughts with me
You are curious about me
You want to know who I am and you want to know why

I can’t express how much this makes me feel loved and adored
The way you love me makes me want to be better for you
You have reached into my soul and pulled out emotions I have never felt
You spark my imagination and challenge me to explore new adventures
I hope I never have to wake from the dream you have given me
I want all of you – your laughter, your pain, your passion, and your heart
I promise to never take for granted this easy connection – intimate, honest, and rare

All hail the dragonfly, master of the sky.
Master of the swamp.
Master of it's prey, be it orange, white or grey.
Perhaps the common whitetail, zooming all about,would choose to dress in the blues and hues of the dasher and wallow in the clout.

Don't mistake him for the damselfly, he'd rather die, he wouldn't be seen like that.
Even through the magnificence of his multifaceted eye.

All that structural coloration makes him look like a Christmas decoration.

All hail the dragonfly, master of the sky.
Master of the swamp.
Master of it's prey, I'll hail it each and every day.