My mind has faulty insulation, cracks for thoughts to creep in no matter how hard I try to block them out. Fractures as if from years of wear letting painful memories or cringing moments flood my head wreaking havoc as they soil it all. Regrets plague my conscience, stealing me from sleep, from peace. Keeping carefree out of my reach, to no end. No end in sight.

A.C.

I've met so many people,
Seen so many faces
Yet here I am
Sitting by the tree
All alone,
Often Pondering
What life would have been?
Had I not cut off
People who reminded me of
Simpler and happier times,
Singing together
To the tunes that barely rhymed,
Had I not cut off
The things that always seemed so real,
And some feelings that I tried to conceal.
But here I am
Learning to be happy,
Even if it seems sloppy
Maybe God's watching over me,
As I walk along my path carefree
Maybe I was playing with my sanity,
Just by sleeping in the arms of destiny.
Will I be happy about being selfish?
Or is treading the longer path towards gratitude something I'd relish?

Happiness in an electromagnetic energy
Which flows from person to person in a liturgy
We say hallelujah in harmonious synergy
The joy spreads like ripples of the sea of Sicily
The spirit is contagious
Shining bold and religious
That smile expressed is prodigious
Mirrored from me to you which is unpretentious
The feeling is a supernatural high
Like the sun rays which pervade the sky
Expressing our soul's chi
A revelation of our energy that can electrify

Ah, what a sight to see!
With the bright sun in the distance
Chirps of the bugs and bees
To forget the reason for our distance

A walk to end all walks
Till I see the dawn wake
As I reminisce that box
That always made you quake

Longing to dream as you could dream
Not to remember and a night to forget
To forget that pitched scream
And the tumble of your chess set

All I can do is wait for my day
And continue to live carefree
Walking into the next Friday
Living in a shattered reality

You ask for where my destination is,
I smile, but not answer,
My heart is at leisure.

A man on his boat,
Just like an immortal.
His melodic aged voice sung,
“Up is heaven, down is earth,
Where the wind blows,
Is where I go.”

I chase after balloons without a second thought. I break into a full sprint down the street, across a parking lot, onto a busy road, just about anywhere, don't care who sees, don't care who stares. I once caught two balloons on the same day within about 5 minutes of each other. It was a great day.

But now I see
After the destructions hit me
That I was too carefree
That jinxed my own glee;