I thought vulnerability was for the weak.
Even when I let you inside my thoughts
I've had both hands on your steering wheel.
I swerve hard left turns on the difficult memories,
dodging the on coming traffic of blatant truths.
My minds is a pile up on intestate 98
but I have you on the detour route
to Mr. Nice Guy lane on the road of "life is okay".
The next stop is "I am happy" street on the corner
of "you will be all right" avenue and "I don't care" lane.
But these fabricated roads are painted over signs
that trick you into believing that I am truly "fine".
But all the cars have crashed and burned
and now you know the truth.

A mother
Two sons
A reckless drive

Deadly injuries
Tried staying alive
Faces of tears
As he disappears

Leaving them broken
Along with hopeless
Everyday the notice
That their son was motionless

Headlights, LED's, burning bright
Into my retinas, reflected in rear view
And side mirrors, a radiator grill just
Visible, almost the outline of a person
Behind the wheel, androgynous ghost,
Mad Max or just mad, determined
To drive to wherever, faster than
Anyone else, cocooned in black leather
Heads up display laid out across sweeping
Digital dashboard, vying to pass me;
But what of the queue plainly ahead
Stretching to far horizon, vanishing point,

Perhaps it is supernatural, absorbing traffic
Clearing the way by passing through it,
An alien craft with technology far
Advanced from our slow turning wheels
Selfishly driving alone in our home from
Home interiors, gathering subjects
For an out of this world experience
Or maybe a time machine
Like Back to the Future powered by flux
Capacitor, it will disappear and turn up
Ahead of all of us, or maybe my imagination
Has run riot and it's just another impatient
Idiot.

I love to sleep with both eyes wide open,

So I can catch my dreams in the real world.

Maybe I just made all this up in my head.

I have written the truest story never told.

I dared to laugh at a joke nobody spoke.

Disembarking the coattails of a trail of smoke.

Where's my car?

I forgot where I parked.

I am lost,

In this labyrinth of thought.

But it is okay.

Maybe this is where I am meant to be,

A place made by me.

We heard the screech
Then the pop
Of metal on metal
Or metal on wood
It’s hard to tell the difference
When you’re half asleep

People were running
To it and from it
People afraid that they’d
Be sent away
Away from their babies
Others stopped them and calmed them

My thumbs wrestled
With dialing 9-1-1
But I described it best I could
As quickly as I could
And as accurately as I could
Then we waited.

An image
A sound
A motion
It stops.
Mind reeling
What happened?
Can’t think
No, can’t be
Not to me
Call who?
Police? Why?
Oh... I see...
Wait, I’m alive
But what if...
I could’ve died.
Now what?
Why am I crying?
I can’t look
The damage is bad
Am I breathing?
My fingers won’t still
Typing, calling, yelling
What happened?
The image
The sound
The motion
Again, again, again

the red light bores into my eyes
--hypnotizing me--

before bright rays slide through the dust
warming my skin

I see the blue melting with the yellow
to form a vibrant green
that
signals for me


my foot releases
itself
from the brake

my momentum move me
forward
away from
safety

and then I see the headlights
slowly fading to black

everything is silent

death feels like a mother's embrace
Doesn't it?

what was forgotten comes
flashing back
only now

in sepia

Well somebody said
Cars are for strong men
You can't love your car
If you do not spend

Hours of attention
Stacks full of money
But I was born to love you
And you to make me happy

Calling for my attention
Calling for my love
As close as we could be
I saw note , sticked on


I wanna be the one with unbreakable field
Wanna be the one, simply by nature
I do wanna be the one
Knowing how to stop my heart

Car price is going high
******* right at me
I can't still believe
What it is doing to me

Im starting to tremble
I'm starting to care about
But Inside in my hearth
I know I'm not alright